You're not alone, I promise. I'm on a floor in LTC with 36 patients on the 3-11shift. I had another nurse from 3-7 then would be on my own. Within just a month of being there, the demographics changed completely. We received many highly combative, anxious, screaming, noncompliant and just generally more intense residents. I voiced my concerns over and over to the supervisors, ADON and DON and was told I was having trouble because I was a new nurse. I knew that while a small part of it was that, the other part was that these residents were far too complex for one person to pass meds much less address any issues or concerns.
I ended up with pneumonia and was out for a week. When I returned, all of a sudden they had on two 3-11 nurses. When questioning the other nurses, no one really knew why but I am fairly sure that one of the supervisors or administrators had to work the floor and realized I wasn't just being a frantic new nurse. It was actually a mess.
LTC is not my favorite place. I had two nights of orientation and then was let go on my own. Now, if I ask a question or just want to bounce ideas off a more experienced nurse I get heavy sighs and irritated answers. One supervisor actually put her head on the desk and said, "Seriously?" when I asked about a very involved admission form I had never even seen before. I'm just trying to keep my head down and push through to get my year of experience and get out. The facility is actually one of the best in my area and the staff all really care about the residents but the lack of any sort of real training and inconsistancies are driving me crazy. I actually found out half of what I was told in orientation was false and completely against regulation.
One supervisor told me to forge a document that I had forgotten to follow up on the night before. She actually said, "Just make up some numbers. It'll be fine" I told her obviously I would not do that and she said, "Well, that's on you" And all I could think was, Yes, Yes that is on me. I made a mistake and if I get reprimanded for it then it's for good cause. I'm not going to lie, period, but especially not on a patient record.
Anyways, just a few of my horror stories. Know you're not alone and any nurse I've talked to says the first year is horrific but once you get your feet wet, and can get into a field that you enjoy more, it's worth it.
Best of luck with everything.