George and Martha..One Nurse's recounting of a fetal demise...

I too am a first semester nursing student. A similar situation is what made me decide to become a nurse. I was 15 weeks pregnant when I found out my unborn daughter was not going to make it. She held on for another 5 weeks before I had to go to the hospital to deliver my daughter who would never come home with me. I spent those 5 weeks coming to grips with her death, making her an outfit to be buried in, a blanket to be wrapped in, and arranging funeral arrangments. I was so wrapped up with myself and my loss that I forgot about my husband. And it has affected us to this day (it happened 2 and a half years ago).

My nurses were not as special as you. They never came in my room to "check on me", they only came in to get the vitals they needed. There were no tender touches or words. Surprisingly it was the doctor who comforted me.

I held my daughter for 2 hours. Looking at her perfect fingers and toes and ignoring all of the swelling she had from head to toe. She had Turner's Syndrome and many cystic hygroma's. But she was PERFECT! She had her fathers nose and her brothers lips and my funny looking feet. We named her Mariela Sancia and buried her with my grandfather.

I want to be the compassionate nurse that you were that night. That is my inspiration. I had three healthy children prior to going through this heartwrenching event and all of my nurses were great. I want to be that great nurse through the good and the bad. I believe that it can make a world of difference to the mother who needs it.

Mermaid you are awsome! Your writing ability is so very great. Even if you decide not to publish a book (which I think you should) be sure to submit it to nursing magazines or even Good Housekeeping etc.You're right that who we are goes into our "practice". Isn't it amazing all of the touching situations we see & deal with on a daily basos. We are so privalleged to be there & make a difference! CONNIE

That brought tears to my eyes as I read it...it was so well written and anyone that has ever been there can relate to it. I agree with the other posts..you should publish! Thanks so much for sharing!

Mermaid...Your voice is beautiful! I am starting nursing school in Jan. and I know that I have been called to the mother/baby speciality. I hope that your compasion is what I have in my heart. Good luck with publication!

That was beautiful. I hope I can be as wonderful as you the day I have a family who has lost their baby as my patient in postpartum. I am in tears here.

Martha, I was very touched by your story. I've only seen one 15 week fetus, but he was perfect. 97 grams-funny how you remember. His mother held him for a long time. He still had a heartbeat, so hard not to be able to do anything.

I work with the babies, don't remember how I got involved with that one as I wasn't there when he delivered.

Keep on writing, you do have a way with words.

What a beautifully written sad sad story. I am sitting here in tears. How good you were to that poor woman.

Mermaid4- this is an amazing story. You have touched me beyond words. I am currently a nursing student and have my heart set on becoming a labor and delivery nurse. My only real worry is-will I be able to comfort a patient in need. I am very emotional and not really good at containing those emotions. Will there be training for this important aspect of nursing? I don't mind showing people how I feel but I also want to show them that I can be strong for them and their situation.