How to handle the death of a faculty member with young children

Specialties School

Published

This is my first year in school nursing (most of my experience ICU and dealing with death/talking to families of older age). I just received news one of our faculty members has passed away. He was very young, had just had gastric bypass a couple months earlier and was doing great. I work in an inner city school so for most students these faculty members are the closest thing they have to a family or true loving relationship. My kids are preK-8th. How do I deal with this loss as a school nurse? These poor kiddos are going to be devastated to hear the news :(

Flare, ASN, BSN

4,431 Posts

Specializes in school nursing, ortho, trauma.

I am so sorry for your loss. While I am positive you and your colleagues will do all that you can for your students as far as support, be sure to support one another.

kidzcare

3,393 Posts

I am so sorry for the loss of this young man. It's very sad.

My son's kindergarten teacher passed away at the end of my son's year with her. She had been with the district a very long time. She had been ill for a while (brain tumor) and had been off work for an extended time before passing. I don't know how they handled the immediate aftermath but a couple months later they planted a memorial tree by the school playground and had a small service there for her.

GdBSN, RN

652 Posts

Specializes in School Nurse.

I am very sorry for your loss. Encourage your students to talk about their feelings. Be supportive and patient, students will act out in many different ways because they do not know how to deal with their feelings. Does your district have any type of grief counselors that could come to your campus?

NutmeggeRN, BSN

2 Articles; 4,620 Posts

Specializes in kids.

OH my...I am so sorry. You have a difficult time ahead but you and other staff will be there for them, and that will help. Just please take care of yourself during this process.

OldDude

1 Article; 4,787 Posts

Specializes in Pediatrics Retired.

I think these guys are giving great advise to take care of yourself and other staff and, in so doing, you'll be able to better take care of the little ones. What a sad situation...prayers are heading your way from all over.

mom to many

104 Posts

I'm so sorry. Prayers for you and your students and faculty.

MrNurse(x2), ADN

2,558 Posts

Specializes in IMC, school nursing.

So sorry, prayers for you, your coworkers and students.

TaylsRN

17 Posts

thank you all for your kind words and advice. We had a crisis intervention specialist come to the school today and all the children have made cards for his family. it has been a hard day for the students but so far they are all handling it very well, we've even had time to talk about the dean and the memories the students have had with him which I feel has helped. All of the advice above has been great and the principal and I will be coming up with some sort of memorial plant or scholarship in honor of him. you guys are amazing :inlove:

mrsfoster601

96 Posts

Yeah I can relate I was offered a school nurse job at one of the other elementary schools around this area but the school nurse at one of the schools passed away during my hiring process so I had to take her school I was so nervous didn't know what I was walking into my first day of work at the school turned out ok I was an listening ear for the staff and the students and the school was glad to have me so just be that listening ear sometimes people just want someone to talk to:)

Windchaser22

408 Posts

Specializes in School nurse.

I'm so sorry for your loss. We are here for you too.

Specializes in SICU, trauma, neuro.

Not a school nurse, but my kids' schools have seen their share of loss the past couple of years. Last year the high school lost 3 students to a murder-suicide, earlier this year two kids were killed within a week or two span (one accident, one homicide); and 2 yrs ago a faculty member at the elementary school was killed in an MVC.

I don't know that the nurses did anything in particular; they did have grief counselors brought in for the high school incidents. The principal sent a mass e-mail to families with the news; expressing his condolences to the families and friends; and outlining steps the school had taken to help the students. I don't know if or how they broke the news to the students.

The faculty member had been a para in my middle daughter's K or 1st grade classroom. I remember she was heartbroken. The principal likewise sent an e-mail to the parents within a couple of hours of her death, and at least in my daughter's classroom the teacher told the children. I don't remember if they had any other services available.

I'm sure you'll be a comfort to your students; you clearly care about them. Given the high incidence of family dysfunction I would maybe advocate for getting a grief specialist if the school hasn't already. And then if you notice an increase in physical or behavioral sx in individual kids, advocate for them.

I'm very sorry for the loss of your colleague!

+ Add a Comment