What gives with the unsupportive spouses? - Page 4

How true skylark! Kids are very able to adapt, and they do recognize a parents efforts. They might not understand enough of the details of adult life to fully appreciate your sacrifice when they are little, but I assure you as an adult daughter of a nurse I look back and feel extremely thankful for everything my Mom did.

Nursing school is temporary. It is not a permanent change. I do not see any implied contract in marriage that says someone can't enter college just because they were not in college at the time of the marriage. In fact, I would argue that if there is an implied contract to marriage and parenthood, it is that you promise to do your very best to love, support, and provide for your family to the best of your ability under all circumstances. Giving up on an education you desperately want is not doing your spouse or your family any service. The only thing it will achieve is regret, unhappiness, and most likely resentment.

My feelings about others are based upon how they treat people. If someone walks this earth consistently mistreating people, you can bet your bottom I'll judge them all day. I believe the vast majority of people do the same or something similar. There are always exceptions, like kids cousin who sounds like a very misguided woman who should probably consider the needs of her family more. I'm not saying there are not exceptions, but I think those kind of stories about unsupportive spouses like 'Linda's' are the minority not the majority of student spouses.

We all have our opinions and our judgements, it is a matter of whether or not we are bold enough to express them or feel it appropriate to express them. It is not a matter of whether or not such judgements exist. What do we have if we don't have each other? If we can't put our best foot forward to treat the people in our lives with respect how can we expect anyone to respect us?

Marriage and parenthood do not solely define an individual. Surely, many of us wear many different hats not just the Wife or Mom/Dad hat. If someone's spouse doesn't respect their partners desire to be an individual outside of the marriage, I find it difficult to respect them. At the same time if someone compromises the well being or finances of their family in the process of chasing the chosen career of the month, I can't hold much respect them either.

I'm not irrational. I can clearly understand 'there are always two sides to every story" and sometimes the student may be a high maintenance selfish pain in the rear who expects far too much of their spouse, but do you honestly think the majority of people who feel their spouse is unsupportive are completely off base in expressing their frustration? I could be wrong, but my gut tells me that is not the case. A few invalid student perspectives does not negate the reality in which many spouses are un-supportive for completely selfish reasons.