I need some encouragement and maybe a kick in the pants....
Back in 1999, I was a 3.9 gpa pre-nursing/pre-med major and loving it. I dreamed of being a doctor or a nurse practitioner working in primary care someday. In 2000 I left to become a stay at home mom. As early as 2003 the urge to go back was creeping back in. Over the years I've talked myself out of/and been talked out of nursing with so many reasons.... among them, fear that the sacrifice of nursing school wouldn't be worth it; fear I would not have enough spoons (energy) to make it as a new nurse on the floor; fear I would not get a job in the post 2008 economy and the glut of new grads.
I was dead set on going back in 2011 when I once again was talked out of it by people telling me that I was too old to work night shifts and there was no way I was getting hired in this economy without starting on nights. I told myself that I just couldn't do it. I've tried every avenue I could think of to circumvent nursing and still do what I want to do. But the reality is that nothing can replace the medical/clinical training of nursing (short of medical school); no career will allow me to do the things I could as a Nurse and a Nurse Practitioner. I need to view that time as a new nurse on the floor, maybe working nights, like an internship/residency that will give me the background I need to reach my goals. I need to stop letting fear dictate my decisions. I need to find ways to overcome the challenges, like the difficulty of working nights at my age (I'm 37 now). I need to stop doubting myself.
I've recently started talking to my husband about finally going back for my ADN/BSN (and ultimately FNP) and he is somewhat supportive but still trying to talk me out of it. He doesn't think the sacrifice will be worth it in terms of time away from him and the family (our kids are 10 and 12 years old and we homeschool). He tells me that he is happy to support me financially and I don't need to work. But I want to work? Is that crazy?
Friends who are nurses are telling me that a nursing career just isn't worth it with the grim realities of working as a nurse on the floor these days. Other friends who are nurses are telling me to go for it. It is hard work, but rewarding.
Will I finally do it? I'm not getting any younger. If I'm ever going to do it, now is as good a time as any. Nurse Practitioner or Bust? I could use some support and encouragement, share your stories with me, etc.My husband just doesn't understand my drive to do this. I know when the going gets tough, I will need support. There will be days when I doubt what I'm doing. I need a support network to remind me of my goals and why I'm doing this. Also, I would like to offer support to others who may be in similar situations. We can do this.
"Don't worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try." -Jack Canfield
