Talked out of nursing by others and myself.... - page 7

by radicalsenseofhope

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I need some encouragement and maybe a kick in the pants.... Back in 1999, I was a 3.9 gpa pre-nursing/pre-med major and loving it. I dreamed of being a doctor or a nurse practitioner working in primary care someday. In 2000 I... Read More


  1. 0
    Who gives a damn what others have to say in relation to your dream? Do it. You don't need all of us here to tell you what to do either; you already know what you need to do. I'm only saying this to push you in a good way. I mean this well.

    "You are far too smart to to be the only thing standing in your way."
  2. 0
    Quote from Carefreeliving
    Who gives a damn what others have to say in relation to your dream? Do it. You don't need all of us here to tell you what to do either; you already know what you need to do. I'm only saying this to push you in a good way. I mean this well.

    "You are far too smart to to be the only thing standing in your way."

    I might just have to add that last line to my motivational wall. Thanks! This thread has been a great kick in the pants for me. Just what I was looking for. :-)
  3. 0
    To OP,
    I think you should go for it. I went to an ADN program, the average age of students was 33. Most of my classmates had children, husbands, fulltime jobs, and they all had trouble juggling their family and household responsibilities with school. I think that it could be a great opportunity for you to set an example for your children-that hard work pays off, and to make them proud of you. And it's also a good opportunity to show them that they will have to work hard to earn what they want because things are not just handed to people. I do not see any down side to furthering your education so that you can better support them, and I am sure one day they will be going to college and that is expensive so it's a great time to get a head start on saving for that too. Also, many of my classmates have had to get extra support from their family while they were in school as far as picking up the slack on chores. I grew up doing chores from a very young age, and when I went to college it was pathetic how many people I had to teach to use the washer and dryer in the dorms. I also have talked with classmates whose husbands never supported them through school and that had put a huge strain on their relationships. They told me that their husbands had always put the children and housework on them and that now they could find a good job to support themselves and they felt liberated and empowered. Whatever you choose to do, I hope it makes you happy and I wish you the best of luck.
  4. 0
    YOU ARE IN NO WAY TOO OLD FOR IT!!!

    I am in an RN program right now (class size = 36). We have 1 woman in her 50s, and AT LEAST 5 in their 40s, and approx 10-15 in their 30s.

    It sounds cliche, but if you set your mind to it, you can achieve it!!
  5. 1
    Quote from radicalsenseofhope
    I need some encouragement and maybe a kick in the pants....

    Back in 1999, I was a 3.9 gpa pre-nursing/pre-med major and loving it. I dreamed of being a doctor or a nurse practitioner working in primary care someday. In 2000 I left to become a stay at home mom. As early as 2003 the urge to go back was creeping back in. Over the years I've talked myself out of/and been talked out of nursing with so many reasons.... among them, fear that the sacrifice of nursing school wouldn't be worth it; fear I would not have enough spoons (energy) to make it as a new nurse on the floor; fear I would not get a job in the post 2008 economy and the glut of new grads.

    I was dead set on going back in 2011 when I once again was talked out of it by people telling me that I was too old to work night shifts and there was no way I was getting hired in this economy without starting on nights. I told myself that I just couldnít do it. I've tried every avenue I could think of to circumvent nursing and still do what I want to do. But the reality is that nothing can replace the medical/clinical training of nursing (short of medical school); no career will allow me to do the things I could as a Nurse and a Nurse Practitioner. I need to view that time as a new nurse on the floor, maybe working nights, like an internship/residency that will give me the background I need to reach my goals. I need to stop letting fear dictate my decisions. I need to find ways to overcome the challenges, like the difficulty of working nights at my age (I'm 37 now). I need to stop doubting myself.

    Stop doubting your self. If your heart is in it, go for it. 37 is rather young!! You already did the stay at home, your kids are a little older and perhaps its mommy time to go back and fulfill her dream?


    I've recently started talking to my husband about finally going back for my ADN/BSN (and ultimately FNP) and he is somewhat supportive but still trying to talk me out of it. He doesn't think the sacrifice will be worth it in terms of time away from him and the family (our kids are 10 and 12 years old and we homeschool). He tells me that he is happy to support me financially and I donít need to work. But I want to work? Is that crazy?

    Please don't take this the wrong way, you asked for advice, so here it goes: I believe every adult should be able to have something to fall back on. Having a wonderful husband that can take care of you is a blessing. Remember, marriages do sometimes fall apart, people die, interests change, life throws lemons at you to bat. I am sure you get my point.

    Friends who are nurses are telling me that a nursing career just isn't worth it with the grim realities of working as a nurse on the floor these days. Other friends who are nurses are telling me to go for it. It is hard work, but rewarding.

    Stop worrying what friends, relatives or the rest of the world tells you. You are 37, not 15 and worried about peer pressure

    If you really want this, do it. How much longer are you gonna put this off? Or have you come to an ultimate decision to just not do it. The answer lies within you and only you. My opinion and the rest of the world's does not matter afterall.

    Will I finally do it? Iím not getting any younger. If Iím ever going to do it, now is as good a time as any. Nurse Practitioner or Bust? I could use some support and encouragement, share your stories with me, etc. My husband just doesnít understand my drive to do this. I know when the going gets tough, I will need support. There will be days when I doubt what Iím doing. I need a support network to remind me of my goals and why Iím doing this. Also, I would like to offer support to others who may be in similar situations. We can do this.

    "Don't worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try." -Jack

    Canfield

    Much luck in your final decision!
    radicalsenseofhope likes this.
  6. 3
    Quote from radicalsenseofhope
    Thanks! Great link! You are so right. I have the fire and I won't be satisfied until I see those letters after my name!

    And yep, it has been over 10 years, so I have to retake my A&P, microbiology, and chemistry. But I'm excited to do so. Loved em the first time around, looking forward to refreshing my knowledge and maybe even deepening my understanding the second time around.
    Dear radical,

    I was 40 when I started nursing school. My situation was different in that I was a recently divorced single mother of a 10 year old daughter and another in her first year of college.

    My first career was as a Registered Dental Hygientist--and most of the prereq's are the same...however, mine were also over 10 years old.

    In my first semester of NS--I retook A&P (Lecture and Lab), Micro, Human Growth and Development AND of course all of the nursing classes--and clinincals. It came to 19 credit hours!!!!!
    and, unfortunately, I had to work 2 days a week as a Hygienist (I took night classes for everything but nursing)

    But that first year FLEW by (the rest was normal) and it is now 20 years later.
    I have never looked back.

    GO FOR IT!!!! I have always worked from day 1 and never had a problem finding a position.

    the diva
    gacna, Jessy_RN, and Red35 like this.
  7. 0
    Quote from nurseladybug12
    To OP,
    I think you should go for it. I went to an ADN program, the average age of students was 33. Most of my classmates had children, husbands, fulltime jobs, and they all had trouble juggling their family and household responsibilities with school. I think that it could be a great opportunity for you to set an example for your children-that hard work pays off, and to make them proud of you. And it's also a good opportunity to show them that they will have to work hard to earn what they want because things are not just handed to people. I do not see any down side to furthering your education so that you can better support them, and I am sure one day they will be going to college and that is expensive so it's a great time to get a head start on saving for that too. Also, many of my classmates have had to get extra support from their family while they were in school as far as picking up the slack on chores. I grew up doing chores from a very young age, and when I went to college it was pathetic how many people I had to teach to use the washer and dryer in the dorms. I also have talked with classmates whose husbands never supported them through school and that had put a huge strain on their relationships. They told me that their husbands had always put the children and housework on them and that now they could find a good job to support themselves and they felt liberated and empowered. Whatever you choose to do, I hope it makes you happy and I wish you the best of luck.
    Thanks for your comments. Good points. I like the thought of teaching my kids how important hard work is.
    Also, I have never liked feeling dependent on my husband financially. I am a fairly smart lady and I've always felt like I should be using that brain to help support my family. Plus, I just have a downright passion for healthcare/nursing that I just can't shake. :-)
  8. 0
    Quote from seanynjboy
    YOU ARE IN NO WAY TOO OLD FOR IT!!!

    I am in an RN program right now (class size = 36). We have 1 woman in her 50s, and AT LEAST 5 in their 40s, and approx 10-15 in their 30s.

    It sounds cliche, but if you set your mind to it, you can achieve it!!
    Thank you! :-)
  9. 0
    Quote from diva rn
    Dear radical,

    I was 40 when I started nursing school. My situation was different in that I was a recently divorced single mother of a 10 year old daughter and another in her first year of college.

    My first career was as a Registered Dental Hygientist--and most of the prereq's are the same...however, mine were also over 10 years old.

    In my first semester of NS--I retook A&P (Lecture and Lab), Micro, Human Growth and Development AND of course all of the nursing classes--and clinincals. It came to 19 credit hours!!!!!
    and, unfortunately, I had to work 2 days a week as a Hygienist (I took night classes for everything but nursing)

    But that first year FLEW by (the rest was normal) and it is now 20 years later.
    I have never looked back.

    GO FOR IT!!!! I have always worked from day 1 and never had a problem finding a position.

    the diva
    Thanks so much for sharing. You are right. The school years will fly by.
  10. 1
    Why should you listen to other, experienced nurses? I don't know. Maybe b/c they have decades of experience, and they have pretty much seen it all.



    I will tell you this, and then I am done here. God bless you and the best to you; but listen. Only go into nursing if you cannot see yourself doing ANYTHING, and I do mean, ANYTHING ELSE. It's a similar question to what pre-meds need to ask themselves, except that the upfront money and time commitment are NO WHERE near the same; thus this is a much bigger question for pre-meds.

    Having said that, please, if you move forward with nursing, know that with the good sides of things, there are a TON of not-so-good things--chiefly, the lack of adminstrative support, overall--and in general--and more backstabbing and subtle infighting and sabatoge that you might ever consider possible. YOU MAY luck out, or at least you may not see it initially. But b/c there is so much underhanded nonsense, on top of other natural stressors to the work, you MUST protect yourself. Therefore, I STRONGLY recommend that you get experience after school and have more than one nursing position. This is better protection IMHO than simply working in a unionized hospital.

    I want you to go in with your eyes wide open, but I know that is only possible to the degree one gets experience in the field. Yes, some nurses ****** just to ******. Some people don't like the essential nature of being a nurse, thus, anywhere they work will be crap to them. But I am NOT talking about those people. I am talking about people that actually LOVED what they did/do as professional nurses. Sadly, the way things are run, that get sucked out of even the best, most enthusiastic of nurses--or those nurses simply become bullies themselves. The important thing is to always be able to work, but regardless of what you think or what others say--even Nurse Mgers or HR people, guess what? Many if not most nurses get eliminated, terminated, fired from positions, even though they were good nurses or at the least, has the potential to be. This is worse now that it ever has been, and it has always been an issues for as long as I have been a nurse (2 decades).

    Protect yourself. The reality is, you can't protect your patients if you can't protect yourself. It doesn't take much to get screwed in this field, and I am NOT kidding. I have seen soooooooooo many good and great nurses get screwed over in this field. So if you really love and can't see yourself doing anything else, go for it. But make sure you protect your ability to work--and that begins with your practicuums/clinicals in school. You can get top grades, if you somehow get screwed during a clinical, you can find that you may not make it through the program, or you may need a reference, and find that some instructor wasn't as positive about you as you thought. This wasn't an issue for me, b/c my mom was a nurse, and she sort of clued me into things before I started. Some students are whiney, don't take initiative, or they are either too passive or the other extreme, ridiculously overbearing, or just plain not careful. But since you have been around the block, you will not be as easily intimidated, and you should be going in with more wisdom about how the real world works.

    Good luck and Blessings and the Best to you.

    It's just not fair IMHO to give people a head's up about what they are going into. ONLY YOU can decide if this is right for you, and if you can or can't see yourself doing anything else.

    radicalsenseofhope likes this.


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