Well, it's been about four or five weeks since school started, and I've been having a bit of a hard time coping thusfar. We got our first AP2 test back yesterday, which was over blood, the cardiovascular system, and the lymphatic system. I felt so confident. I finished the test, I went back over my answers, and I felt great about it. I made a 60. Lowest score in the class.
I studied as best I could. But I also work full time in a LTC, where they told me to begin with I could study as much as I wanted to after the residents went to bed, so long as I caught my call lights. Then they put me on a hall where three women in particular stay on their call lights from the time we put them to bed until we make final round. They swore to me they would assign me to the rehab hall, where most of the pts are self sufficient, only two of which are incontinent, and I wouldn't have to be on my feet the whole 8 hours. But, no, they put me on the more populated long term hall.
By the time I get off of work, I'm exhausted, having been up since 6 in the morning. I do my best to study when I get home, but it's all I can do to keep my eyes open. I'm no spring chicken, I get tired. I can't pull all nighters like most of my fellow students.
So I came to the realization that if I can't get a decent grade in AP, I'm going to have a helluva time in Chem and Micro, neither of which I have studied before. I didn't take biology OR chemistry in high school, which was years ago anyway. I did take AP, and in AP1, I had a solid B (one point shy of an A). Now I'm starting out this semester with a D. I don't want to drop and lose my funding, but I'm scared I'm not going to be able to recover from this first test.
I've considered cutting my hours back at work, but I can't really afford to do that. I have already talked to my other teacher whose class I'm having a problem with and he was real helpful. "If you don't get poetry, there's no sense in staying in Comp 2. You might as well drop." Gee, thanks. I'm still going to have to take it again later. What do I do then? Fake my way through it? Poetry makes NO sense to me. Yes, I read the poems assigned, but I have no idea what they are about. It's like I'm reading Russian. And, before anyone asks, the only learning disability I have is ADD. I'm not dyslexic.
So I have narrowed down the possibilities. I can tough it out for this semester then not return (which would suck, because I atleast need a degree in SOMETHING), or I can switch my major. I had originally planned on going to school for my Bachelors in Agricultural Education, and now I'm considering this course instead of what I'm doing. I can finish this semester, hope for a C on my nursing pre-reqs, and change majors when I go to register for classes for Spring. Most everyone would understand. I can maintain my job as a CNA through school, as it's the first job I've ever had that I find atleast tolerable. But then I could graduate with my degree and be an Agri teacher at (hopefully) a local school. I already know I can teach just about every shop course, only needing a slight refresher in Forestry and small engine repair. Welding, general shop, animal sciences are no brainers for me. I know this stuff like the back of my hand. Maybe I was fooling myself thinking I could be a nurse. Maybe -- just maybe -- it's more than I expected it to be. Or maybe I'm just overwhelmed with work and school.
So, my question is this. Is nursing, a career that I have kicked around in my head for the past ten years, really worth the stress and sacrifices I'm about to have to make to make it happen? Or would I be better off going down my original career path, becoming an Agri teacher, and touch the lives of people in a different way?
Oct 11, '12
Saysfaa- I have done welding for the past 10 years professionally. That's one reason I got so good at it. When I was taking welding classes for my AAS, the teacher basically let me teach the class because I had far more experience than he did. I also had a hand in grading. I will admit, some people didn't pass basic welding because of me. Not because I have ridiculously high standards (it was the first time most of them had been anywhere near molten metal), but because they made no progress.
wordsofmymouth- I am still going over the possibilities on this. I know, for a fact, that I am going to stick it out as best I can this semester. The only class I'm dropping is Comp 2. There are two other professors that teach Comp 2, so I am going to talk to them next week (I've been out of school this week for a different reason) and see which one will either rely less on poetry or will at least help me to understand what is I'm reading. I wish the teacher I took Comp 1 under was still teaching in this area.
I am fairly convinced that I will be changing my major for next semester. I know it seems like a knee-jerk reaction to receiving a bad grade, but in all honesty, I haven't been as excited about nursing as I should be. I had also considered RT, and was considerably more excited about that, but the fact is that RRT jobs are hard to find in this state. There is an RRT at the hospital here making less than a CRTT.
I am not doing this lightly. I know that if I could make it through nursing school, I would love being a nurse. I know that I would make a good nurse. But something deep inside me has always wanted to be a teacher. It may be the feelings of yearning I had in high school for a teacher that would care about me, met only by my agri teachers. And I think I can handle teaching agri better than any other subject. English, while I am good with words, does not appeal to me that much. Yes, I like editting essays, but the reading would bore me to death. History is lost on me. Science would be fine, except I would be stuck with students that aren't interested. Math is just beyond my comfort.
I know that as an agri teacher I will get kids that aren't interested in doing the projects that I will assign. That's fine. They can fail and I will be able to explain why. "Well, Mrs. Smith, little Johnny thought it would be more fun to sit around and flirt with Susie than do the assigned project, therefore he received a substandard grade." I don't believe that every student in a general shop class should be passed because the class "doesn't mean anything." Perhaps, as I further my career, my view points will change, but at least at first, I won't be everyone's buddy the agri teacher.
So I think it's an education in education for me. There will be less competition, less stress, and better nights of sleep. Yes, I still have to take a few classes I wish I didn't (Chem, Lit, etc), but all-in-all, I think the outcome afterwards will be a happier rivershark2005.
Last edit by rivershark2005 on Oct 11, '12
: Reason: Missed a word...