A good thing, or setting up for failure?

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    My journey through the desire to know more about myself, the path I chose, and my questioning of whether it is good or not I prepare now.

    A good thing, or setting up for failure?

    Hey y'all!

    Another boring day at the ranch, been holing up with a migraine that hasn't let up for two days. As such, I have a lot of time to study things, think about my upcoming move to Fresno for schooling and the nursing program. On a sidenote, a big thanks to Jowelenne, at Mercy Medical Center Merced for your advice to go to Fresno, and for helping me so much in general.

    I have a lot of family who are/were either nurses or doctors. The medical field has always been a fascinating deal for me. I suppose it came natural to me, at 16, to do my first PICC line on my dad.

    Sure, in high school, my nickname may have been the shrink. I loved trying to help people with their issues, but never thought I'd try to make a career out of it. At one point perhaps at 18/19, I considered taking my moms path as an RN, and concluded I didn't want to have to tell patients family members that I just coded their loved one, and could not save them. Or have to tell a pregnant mother that she will have a miscarriage. You know, the sad stuff. The bad of nursing. The things that I still have vivid memories of, my mom coming from her shift at 7AM exhausted because she did this all on the daily.

    I reckon perspectives change over time, and mine certainly did. I reckon I toughened up, realized bad things happen every day. And I can either try to do something, think of the differences I will make, rather than the ones I could not make.

    This journey to the path I chose started with anxiety I developed almost a year ago exactly. It's not that I'm a cyberchondriac who Google's every ache and pain I may experience in the day, rather I felt frustrated that I received no answers to what I was experiencing, so I just started doing my own research, and quite frankly, fell in love with becoming more knowledgeable on the subject and wanting to help others going through the same thing, and worse.

    At some point, I reckon I got tired of my seemingly-never-ending pages of the psych nursing book, and broke out my mom's Lippincott manual which she used before she took the NCLEX, oh, sometime in the 80s if my memory serves me.

    I, again, became glued to this, and still haven't let down.

    When my work is done around my ranch, job searching is done, and my personal and social needs are fulfilled I find myself becoming waist deep in studying the nursing books, most of which I can understand pretty well. The stuff I can't understand, I flip to the next page and figure there's a time and a place to learn that particular thing.

    I'd say, on average, I spend 2-3 hours of my day studying nursing. Issue being is I'm not even in the school yet.

    To me, it is also a great distraction,and a fulfilling timekiller rather than the incessant, addictive realms of the internet, and makes me feel like I'm actually doing something with my time.

    Is this an OK practice to do? Is it OK to enter the nursing program in 2 years having some basis and idea of what I'm in for, rather than walk in blindly? The way I see it, I'm not studying to pass a test, and make money. I want to make a difference, it's what I thrive on.

    Or will this knowledge I will learn be thrown out the window, and end up fixin' myself up for failure in the long run?

    I'm almost leaning on the latter, but then again, I do figure this habit is indeed a better way to kill my time than most activities. Thanks y'all!
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    About Mudpinesredneck

    Mudpines redneck: 23 years old, owner of the Gadsden Mountain Ranch in beautiful Midpines California

    23 Years Old; Joined May '17; Posts: 34; Likes: 48.

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    3 Comments

  3. by   BookishBelle
    I always think being a self learner is a great thing. Too many kids in my nursing program complained that they had to "teach themselves". I'm pretty sure there's no way for a teacher to download all their knowledge and experience directly into your head so I didn't really get what they were moaning about. The more you put into it, the more you get out! If you are really enjoying it, I would maybe think about getting some more current copies out of the library, since things are constantly changing in our understanding of the body and medicine. There's also some wonderful YouTube channels. I think your studying and engagement will only be beneficial to you!
  4. by   Mudpinesredneck
    Hey Bookish! Thanks for the input! Been thinking Nurse Bass and Nurse Mendoza have great channels!

    When I start riding my motorcycle more for school, I'm going to try to buy a helmet with audio built in, then get a ram mount for my handlebars. Gonna be fun riding off in the woods listening to that kinda stuff. Well, it'll also play its fair share of Pantera and Five Finger Death Punch, but I'll definitely keep nursing audiobooks in mind! Lol
  5. by   BookishBelle
    I'll have to check out nurse Mendoza- I love Sara at registered nurse rn so mostly listen to her while cleaning or other boring things. I did the same thing with my mom's old nursing textbooks a couple years ago when trying to decide on my path, so your post made me smile!

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