Anyone else with PICU orientation woes...?

I'm so sorry to hear about your unfortunate experience. Some people are just not cut out to mentor others and it sounds like you've been saddled with one. There could be any number of reasons why she's treating you like this and I'd say most of them would be her issues and not yours. She might be someone who doesn't think new grads should work in ICU. Or she may be one of those who believes that there is only ONE correct way to do anything but you're not privy to those methods and if you want to work in HER unit you should have learned them before you arrived. She may be someone who feels threatened by new staff to the point where she can't see any benefit to having them around so she's chasing you away. She could be someone who cannot relinquish control of any aspect of patient care and resents having to do so for an orientee. Or she might be insecure in her own skills and position on the unit. Then again, she might just be a miserable person! I work with at least one of each, so I can see how it might be for you. She obviously has no idea how to be an effective preceptor or to give constructive criticism. Your manager doesn't sound like a very sympathetic sort either. Do you have a clinical nurse educator you could talk to about what you've learned and how your orientation is going? Is there someone else on your unit whose style and personality more closely mesh with yours who could take over your orientation? It would be such a shame to throw the baby out with the bathwater here.

Don't be discouraged if your orientation is extended. In this environment that could be a blessing. And remember that orientation is only the first stage of learning how to function well on your unit. When you're turned loose on your own, you're only going to know the basics of how to do your job. Each patient and family will teach you something. Right now you're focused on the details... everything you do is mentally broken down into steps as you do it. It takes a minimum of 1000 repetitions for an activity to become second nature. So give yourself some credit and some room to grow.

Don't wait for things to get better, find a way to MAKE them better. Use your language skills to create a script for speaking to your CNE and manager about changing preceptors. How can you word your request so that it doesn't sound whiny (your word, not mine)? "I'm feeling as though my learning style isn't compatible with Mary's teaching methods. She's really good at bedside care but I don't feel as though I'm able to emulate her the way I'd like. Perhaps my preceptorship would go better if I were partnered with Rachel for the rest of my scheduled orientation." It's all in the presentation.

Let me know if there's any way I can help.

You are definitely not alone in a miserable orientation experience. I am having one myself in med-surg. I am sorry it is going so badly for us but it is good to know I am not alone in how I feel. I too was very excited to begin work, thought I had found my niche in life, and received nothing but positive comments in clinical rotations. Now I feel completely incompetent and abused daily and wonder what I have gotten myself into.

My nurse has been in the profession for 33 years and precepted many orientees. Everyone says how good she is at precepting (including my manger and nursing education) but I just dont see it right now. Professionalism is lacking, native languages are spoken amongst staff and critiques are done in patient's rooms! Everytime I have said something it has been completely misinterpreted so now I just grin and bear it and focus on the skills she is teaching. I have been told things like "you need to be faster" as if a new grad who has only been doing this for 3 weeks doesnt know that already. Easy for a 30+ year pro to say. When I asked for tips on time management and organization I am told "it comes with time" and "you need to relax...you worry to much." I am given no constructive criticism yet I am told to "be more confident." I now attribute my frustrations to a cultural diference and a poor unit atmosphere so there is not anyone else o turn to. I have never had anyone so up my backside ever and it is hard not to be anxious in a situation when you are not given room to breathe and figure things on your own and thus build confidence. I could go on and on.

Thanks for letting me vent. We'll get through this and one day I think/hope I will appreciate the experience. I plan on paying my dues here for 6months to a year and then move to a more positive unit. We all deserve to feel fulfilled! Best wishes to you!