Why do nurses eat their young? - page 4

I received my DREAM JOB last June in L&D as a new grad and was basically taught everything I know from my wonderful preceptor. I was hired for nights, because that was what was available at the time... Read More

  1. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Quote from Tweety
    Because you taste good.


    . Why brand the whole profession and them as a group over this one issue?
    I agree.

    I wish the OP good luck. But then, we make a lot of our own, and you sound prepared to do that. I hope it all works out.
  2. by   SmilingBluEyes
  3. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Great post Steph!!!
  4. by   Tweety
    Quote from SueBee RN-BSN
    Every single nurse in this fourm has been eaten, and has eaten. Most are shamed to admit it. Abuse is a cycle, and we all know it.

    Stand up for yourself, and teach nurses to become strong together. If some nurses refuse to follow, or lead others to a better profession, well, tell them lead, follow or get out of the way. It's really that simple-

    I have had a couple of "moments". I was having a horrible day and was being called by PACU every 15 minutes about a bed and finally I blew up and asked her very firmly to not call again, nothing has changed in the last 15 minutes and I would call when the room was ready and I hung up on her in the middle of her sentence.

    I can only imagine her coming to this board if she was a new grad "I was SCREAMED at.........why do nurses eat their young?" The reality was after I took a deep breath and waited a few minutes I called back and apologized for hanging up on her, but that repeated phones were unecessary.

    I could have come to the board, and cried "the PACU nurse harrassed me endlessly. Why do nurses eat their young?"

    So yes, we all have our moments in time when we are less than 100% peaceful, loving and kind. But it still doesn't mean we as a profession eat our young. I take each moment for what it is.

    I do like your last paragraph. Excellent advice.
  5. by   SueBee RN-BSN
    Quote from caroladybelle
    No, my dear, much of what gets labeled "eating'" is not abuse but miscommunication, constructive criticism taken wrong, or oversensitive feelings.

    While there is definitely some abuse in healthcare, it is not the pervasive ill that you perceive it to be. And it is just as prevalent in most other professions. But quite a bit of "eating" really isn't.

    Please do ascribe what YOU feel to all of the rest of us. Not "every single" ever really is.
    It's abuse plain and simple. I do find it interesting how many nurses don't know what abuse is, or if they are being abused. I must wonder if their childhood holds the answers to this?? This would be an interesting study!!!
  6. by   Tweety
    Quote from SueBee RN-BSN
    It's abuse plain and simple. I do find it interesting how many nurses don't know what abuse is, or if they are being abused. I must wonder if their childhood holds the answers to this?? This would be an interesting study!!!
    It's plain and simple to you. I think we have to allow for some leeway here in personal opinions what is abuse and what isn't.

    Someone might label me hanging up on a PACU nurse as abuse, others don't.

    Personally I don't label what the original poster stated as "abuse".
  7. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I guess I have a thick skin. I don't see this as abuse so much as maybe a bit of witchiness (with a B). Like I said, thicker skin, strong self-assertion and a sense of humor will get a person far in this profession, as in any.
  8. by   caroladybelle
    Quote from SueBee RN-BSN
    It's abuse plain and simple. I do find it interesting how many nurses don't know what abuse is, or if they are being abused. I must wonder if their childhood holds the answers to this?? This would be an interesting study!!!
    I believe if you review my posts on this BB, you will find that I AM WELL aware of what abuse is and that I do not tolerate true abuse.

    Unfortunately on many of the posts that sling aroung the terms : eating, bullying, abuse, harassment, unfair, etc....it becomes clear that in many cases, that this is not abuse but someone taking offense at appropriate criticism, grading issues, etc.

    We also only hear one side of the store, we are rarely given the opposing side. Thus the info we get on the BB is quite biased.

    Recently, a male poster wrote a post, in which he complained that he wanted to have tips to help keep him from being "raped" by paying taxes at tax time. When I responded that "rape" is not an appropriate term for being required to pay one's monetary due and it is offense to use that term for mere tax payment, I was slammed by the terms "politically correct" and being too uptight.

    I responded as I will respond to you. When one uses such brutal terms as rape or abuse or bullying or harassment, etc. to describe things that are not truly in the same class as rape/abuse/bullying/harassment, it diminishes that case of those that ARE truly being treated unfairly and brutally. The words lose their meaning, and their cases get thrown in as just more noise....another person claiming brutality, where there may be little....

    May you not know what true abuse is...I have family lost and family found from the Holocaust, and have been overseas to the third world. They could tell you about "unfair" and "abuse".
    Last edit by caroladybelle on Apr 2, '07
  9. by   PANurseRN1
    Quote from cinthern
    Thanks again, I appreciate both sides of the coin. I can totally tell who has been a nurse for a long time and who are newbies just by the responses. No need for any hostility, it's just an observation I have made from being where I have been for the last year, and the nurses who have been around for a long time are definitely more impatient, nasty and downright mean to me, but that's there problem.

    Nobody "handed" me this job, I worked my ass off for it. I went back to school later on in life (I am in my 40's) to only do L&D nursing, even after everyone I ever met told me I would never be able to get a position as a new grad in L&D, I was determined, and I did it. I will be damned if someone tries to take that away from me. I LOVE what I do, I am sorry that I didn't have to do 1-2 years of med-surg, but I thank God for where I am today.

    Again, thanks for the responses, and keep them coming!

    Jennie
    Funny how we went from great co-workers to this. And who said anyone was trying to take anything away from you. I think you need to cool off a bit. Who even said anything about med-surg?

    If your situation is truly so horrid, leave. Why stay if you are being treated as badly as you claim to be?

    PS: Everyone who goes to nursing school works his/her butt off, not just you.
    Last edit by PANurseRN1 on Apr 2, '07
  10. by   PANurseRN1
    Quote from SueBee RN-BSN
    It's abuse plain and simple. I do find it interesting how many nurses don't know what abuse is, or if they are being abused. I must wonder if their childhood holds the answers to this?? This would be an interesting study!!!
    Maybe it's you who cannot tell the difference?
  11. by   Mrs.S
    Experienced nurses ARE mean to new nurses sometimes; I don't see anything wrong with venting about that. I've seen new nurses where I work become targets of unfair criticism and have heard the more senior nurses make snap judgements about them. I imagine it's the same in any profession. It's a lot harder to let workplace crap like that slide when you are a new grad and unsure of yourself and don't really know anyone yet and they don't really know you...
    And there ARE different dynamics when there is a group of mainly women working together versus a more even mix.
    Anyway, OP, easier said than done but just keep doing what you are doing and it will probably just blow over.
  12. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Quote from cinthern
    I can totally tell who has been a nurse for a long time and who are newbies just by the responses.
    It remarks like this that will not help the problems you speak of, seriously.
  13. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Quote from SueBee RN-BSN
    Every single nurse in this fourm has been eaten, and has eaten. Most are shamed to admit it. Abuse is a cycle, and we all know it.

    Stand up for yourself, and teach nurses to become strong together. If some nurses refuse to follow, or lead others to a better profession, well, tell them lead, follow or get out of the way. It's really that simple-
    Never been "eaten" here.

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