What's the weirdest name you've heard a patient name her baby?

One day, while at the nurse's station, a colleague of mine was wheeling her pt to her postpartum room on a stretcher. As she passed, mom was holding her baby, daddy walking alongside of the stretcher. I cooed over the baby and asked what the baby's name was going to be. Mom said, "Her name is Yoda." Maintaining barely my professionalism, I calmly asked her, "Does this name have a meaning?"--thinking that this perhaps also had a meaning in another language like Swahili (they were a black couple). Nope. Mom says,"No. I just like the sound of it." As she continued on her way, I thought "Poor, poor little girl."

I thought I had heard it all then, but a few years later, I was laboring a couple from Mexico. The father started told me he was going to name his son "Hitler." I swallowed hard and asked him if he knew who Hitler was. He started to tell me what a great and smart man Adolf Hitler was and how proud he was to name a son after Hitler! I have a firm belief that, as a nurse, it is never my job to tell parents what they can and cannot name their children....but.....after much prayer throughout the day, I decided to talk to the parents. I asked dad if they were going to move back to Mexico after the delivery. He said they intended now to make the USA their home. I thought perhaps he might be moving back to a pro-Nazi neighborhood in Mexico. Nope. I finally had to tell him that perhaps he needed to make Hitler the child's middle name if he was insistent on it---or just use the initial H. I explained to him how despised the man Hitler was in the USA and what a hard life his son would have if his name was Hitler. He said he understood and agreed. I never found out what he did wind up naming his son. I still think about this child even today. Sigh.

Finally, there was the mom who named her cute little girl a name that sounded like "Di Giovanni." I asked mom how she was going to spell it. She didn't know. She submitted a birth story to me (I was teaching childbirth classes at the time and had a bi-montly newsletter) and spelled it something like "Dgeefhogmdoy." It definitely didn't look like it sounded. And it was going to be heck for the little girl to learn to spell for school!


Char..

My hockey-playing husband wanted to name our son Zachary Zamboni. Needless to say I said no.

We had a patient with the first name Female. Thinking she had come in AKA, I asked what her name was and she pronounced it "femahlay".

We had another woman named Clamidia.

One of my co-workers swears (no pun intended as you will see in a minute) she knows a young boy with a name that is pronounced " shath-eed" spelled " Sh**head".

I babysat a girl named Heather Ann G..... Poor thing had to be asked not to put her full initials on her homework.

Along that line Clarise, a gal I knew was named Fran, her middle initial was A and last was T.....and she was WELL over 250lb. I felt for her, too! :-(

I was in line at Target today and I thought of you guys.

The register girl's name tag said...

"KAKA"

I'd smack my mother for that.

Heather

Bilirubin, we had a lady that named her son Bilirubin. She thought it was a beautiful name and had been in the hospital with hepatitis and heard the doctor talk about her bilirubin
level rising. So that's what she named the poor kid.

Have also heard of a "Billy Ruben" baby. Went to school with a girl called April Day - all the kids were convinced her middle name was "Fools"!

I had a Plastika Noriega (pronounced PlastikaNoreeeka)

ChickenA' (Sheekeena) looked like chicken A
Tinea Capita....sheesh ringworm?

My sis worked at the dept of social services and said the names follow the soaps....Kayla, Kim, Hope etc.

Of course my hubby's birth certificate read BABY BOY ___ until he went in the Army at age 23, and needed to pick up a birth certificate. We had to go in and change his name!

On Labor and Delivery on TLC this week a mom named her baby Isabella Lugosi. She was of course going to call her Bella.

I went to school with a kid named "Rubbin"-- pronounced "Reuben"