making fun of patients - page 2

i am currently doing an externship on l&d and maternity and often hear the nurses making fun of the patients. such as " omg shes 23 and on her 4th" or " wow shes too young to have children, she... Read More

  1. by   l.rae
    Originally posted by shay


    Young motherhood by itself is not a bad thing. Young motherhood x 5 by age 21 with 5 different men and on AFDC is a bad thing, and quite frankly, the politically correct "approval" of such things is what's wrong with our society in the first place.

    Shay, dahling....did your ever know that you're my hero?.......LR
  2. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Yep--- who needs Jerry Springer when we are firsthand witnesses to such messes IN REAL LIFE? Ya know, teen pregnancy is NOTHING new........but what * is * new is how we are expected to accept all situations, no matter how dysfunctional as "normal" and are expected to respect them. THAT is what has changed from my Mom's generation to ours---- Yes, I, too am a product of accidental teen pregnancy but my MOM did not ask a DIME from our gov't or society and did not get pg repeatedly by different men. NOR did she have more kids than she could feed and take care of in every way! Things have changed even in the last 10 years, and as nurses, we are continually exposed to situations that become more outrageous every day. This gripe we have is NOT about teen motherhood in and of itself. Get our point, Jax?
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on Dec 26, '02
  3. by   jaxm0mma
    i do see your point very clearly.. and do feel venting is perfectly natural. i find many situations i want to scream at... with due cause. maybe i just overlooked the fact that almost everyone coming to the hospital to deliver is on medicade. I will not be one of them but i dont want to be the topic of someones conversation because i am not 30 having my second child.
  4. by   mother/babyRN
    I am with Heather on this one. Personally, I don't "make fun" of patients, but I have mentioned stuff like" Wow, she's so young to have so many kids, etc.." NEVER in front of the pt or in a demeaning way. One CAN make statements such as you described and not have them considered making fun. However, if you run across something like you described that makes you that uncomfortable, assuming it wasn't obviously demeaning or meant to hurt, you might ask yourself if you are taking something personally that wasn't meant that way at all..Nurses under stress sometimes vent their stress with humor, albeit sometimes inappropriate...We should be aware of our surroundings and people's feelings, but when you have been a nurse for some time, you will see that you have to laugh often so you won't cry or crack up.....NEVER should demean or diminish a pt or co worker of course..
  5. by   mother/babyRN
    Pretty much my attitude and attempted approach to ANY pt, whether young or old, on welfare , drugs, booze or anything else untoward or unpleasant, is this...There but for the grace of God, go I....It could happen BUT I still have occasion to vent......(discretely)....I, as well as all of you, would be the first one in there to save lives or protect one, however......
  6. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I doubt not being over 30 is the reason for the gripe. Like shay said, "walk a mile (or 1 million as we have ) in OUR shoes" THEN understand.
  7. by   jaxm0mma
    i was in no way griping but trying to understand... sorry i got things stirred up!
  8. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Well, not to "stir it up more ", but really, coming to a room fulla nurses with this, it may have been what you expected. As you see, none of us is taking "making fun of patients" lightly, but you need to understand where WE are coming from if you come here saying these things. If you are on your way to being an RN, I hope you remember this and can rise above it and provide better care than you saw that day. But remember, it may not always be easy.
  9. by   shay
    Originally posted by jaxm0mma
    i was in no way griping but trying to understand... sorry i got things stirred up!
    You didn't "stir things up," jaxmomma. It's simply that this is a hot button for a lot of us. We see so much abuse of the system every single day and it tends to get really old after a while, kwim?

    Well, sorry I kinda came out fangs first there. I can understand how you might take it that we (OB nurses) "look down" on all young moms, and that's just not the case. We don't. 2 of the patients I had that were the most mature were 14 and 15. One was a rape victim, the other delivered a baby with a severe heart defect that was unknown until delivery. They were amazing. But again, they were the exception to the rule, unfortunately.

    I don't know about anyone else, but I've had an especially icky past few weeks patient wise. Crack mommies and no prenatal care mommies and who's-my-baby-daddy mommies galore. I'm a tad raw. I'd personally love to have a young mom in labor with a wanted pregnancy and supportive family. It would be refreshing right now.
  10. by   mother/babyRN
    I guess we needed to vent!
  11. by   sanakruz
    Please tell me who yall think approves of teenage mothers on welfare? Do you think just because welfare exsists that anyone but an ignorant fool would look at it as a lifestyle CHOICE?

    I was taught to not make value judgements on my patients. I must continually keep myself in check with this.

    So where would you rather have your tax dollars spent? How 'bout education?( Let's include how sucky it is to be a teenage parent. )

    There's always SCUD missles to build, too.
  12. by   shay
    Originally posted by psychnurse.com
    Please tell me who yall think approves of teenage mothers on welfare?
    LOTS of people do. They say so. People in my area of the country, in particular.
    Do you think just because welfare exsists that anyone but an ignorant fool would look at it as a lifestyle CHOICE?
    Yep. I hear welfare mommas laughing all the time at the "chumps" who are out there working while they get a free ride and get to sit at home and milk the system. It is indeed looked upon as a viable, desireable lifestyle by some.
    I was taught to not make value judgements on my patients. I must continually keep myself in check with this.
    Well goody for you. I am human. When I'm perfect, I'll come report.
    So where would you rather have your tax dollars spent? How 'bout education?
    Bwahahaha!! I would prefer not to have my "tax dollars" spent ANYWHERE. I would prefer to keep that money for MYSELF, thank you very much. I am a libertarian, not a socialist.
    There's always SCUD missles to build, too.
    What the hell does this comment have to do with anything being discussed here??

    Let me break it down for you, honey. This is an internet message board for nurses. We come here to vent, to discuss. If you don't like us venting, tough s***. More to the point, this is an OB NURSE discussion area, and YOU, PSYCH NURSE, have no freakin' clue what we go through. Get off your high horse. Puleeze. If you don't like it, DON'T READ IT. We have every right to vent here about the frustrating aspects of our job. This is not happy kitty fun land where everyone is politically correct and syrupy sweet and walks around with rose-colored BLINDERS on. We are on the front lines and see it for what it really is. Unplanned, unwanted pregnancies to ill-prepared, uneducated, uncaring parents is shockingly common in this country, and not just on Jerry freakin' Springer, either.

    Get over it. Yes. I judge. I judge people. It does not affect my care. I get more thank yous from my crack/welfare mommies than the average nurse. Do you honestly think our personal opinions affect our care? NO. We come here to vent. Please walk away and let us do that if you can't handle it.
  13. by   sunnygirl272




    Go, shay, go shay!!!!

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