Hysterical phone calls about people in labor! - page 6

in all fairness, i almost entitled this " hysterical daddies", but realized that, though that is largely the scope of hysterical phone calls regarding people in labor in my experience, it doesn't ,... Read More

  1. by   mark_LD_RN
    you will not believe this one, we got a frequent flier wanna be labor patient and hubby that comes in here every couple days with different complaint and possible labor since she was 34 weeks she is now 38 weeks. well they are a rather unkempt couple. last visit she came here she still had dried blue ultra sound gel on her belly fron 2 days ago. i had her this time checked her and told her to go home take warm bath and get some rest, this was at 11pm. at 3 am i get a call they are at Wal mart walking and she discribes something thick brown and slimmy that came out of her vaginal while walking i told her it sounded like her mucus plug she denied any fluid leakage so i told her to go home get rest yada yada. well get this husband wants to speak to me, he gets on the phone and tells me that the "book says amniotic fluid and mucus plugs smell sweet. and that he smelled it and it smelled sweet and also tasted sweet!" yuk i liked to barfed on the phone. then he shows up with it to show me, yep good old mucus plug wrapped in a little piece of tissue.

    what do you think about this one. well I had to check her again and send her home. it has been a cpl days since we saw her last ,but talked to her doc today he said she had called this evening saying she was in labor and could feel the heart beat in her vagina, and that she thinks she is dialated because husband looked up there and it was open 1 1/2 inches.
  2. by   SmilingBluEyes
    OMG mark you WIN THE GROSS ME OUT AWARDS...i nearly spit my coffee on my computer screen. that truly is the nastiest thing i have heard in a freaking LONG LONG LONG time. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
  3. by   SKM-NURSIEPOOH
    originally posted by smilingblueyes
    omg mark you win the gross me out awards...i nearly spit my coffee on my computer screen. that truly is the nastiest thing i have heard in a freaking long long long time. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
    ....that sure is the :uhoh21: nastiest thing i heard.... lol!!!!

    in fact, that's beyond nasty, that's down right foul.... :imbar yuk!!!
  4. by   lindalou
    We had one the other night come in and tell us she was dialated to 4. after her VE revieled she was high thick and closed the nurse asked her why she said she was 4. she said"well dugh......I can get four of my fingers up there." She was wiggiling her fingers at the nurse. The nurse came out of the room, slapped the counter at the nurses station and acting mad said" I need to go back into orientation, you guys lied to me wiggiling all ten fingers she said this is how to know if your pt is complete!"
  5. by   mother/babyRN
    Ha ha! I recently had a neighbor call and ask if I could do an SVE ( she had gloves) in order to see whether or not she should go to the hospital. I declined as she wasn't that uncomfortable and hadn't had the bendfit of reading her ultrasound to see where the placenta was....If in doubt, just go, I told her. THEN I called ahead and told them to expect her.
  6. by   JenniferNRN
    Originally posted by mother/babyRN
    it isn't unusual for us to throw them ( the OBs) and pedis ( also invited but not required) out of the way so we can do what we have to do. It has happened often enough that they willingly do as the nurse tells them since they know we know more about it than they do

    That is so true...had my first (knock on wood) bag and mask resus. this weekend along with a NICU nurse and I was practically pushing the OB out of the way and instructing her because she wasn't getting a tight seal on the mask. She was ordering others to get a preemie mask because she thought the regular one was too big. It was fine once I took over and got a good seal with the chin up a bit...she just wasn't holding it right or positioning the baby's head correctly. Turned out okay, thank goodness (Wiping the sweat from my forehead), but it is really scary that they don't know how to do it.
  7. by   shay
    Originally posted by lindalou
    We had one the other night come in and tell us she was dialated to 4. after her VE revieled she was high thick and closed the nurse asked her why she said she was 4. she said"well dugh......I can get four of my fingers up there." She was wiggiling her fingers at the nurse. The nurse came out of the room, slapped the counter at the nurses station and acting mad said" I need to go back into orientation, you guys lied to me wiggiling all ten fingers she said this is how to know if your pt is complete!"
    OMG, THAT IS PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!! :chuckle :roll

    And Mark, that mucous plug thing.........that is NAS-TAY!!!!!!!
  8. by   at your cervix
    OK, Mark, I'm not sure I can top your mucous plug story but I am going to give it a try.
    We had a pt a while back that had several children, all of which had been taken way from her because she was not capable of caring for them. She was determied that she would get this baby back and she was also determined to breastfeed, therefore, she breastfed kittens to keep her milk up until she got her baby back. (she never did.) so, how did I do, gross anyone out???
  9. by   anitame
    Wow! At your cervix,
    Think of all the money people spend on pumps. All that time pumping to increase milk supply. Hmm, I'm gonna start a new business marketing kittens for milk supply issues. Wonder if they could help with engorgement too?
    That woman needs a psych consult. Big time.
  10. by   Dayray
    Just think of the poor moma cat.. she must have been really engourged and with 8 breasts too

    poor kitty
  11. by   BBnurse34
    I had a first year resident (male) admit that he had tried to breastfeed a puppy to see what it felt like.
  12. by   KRVRN
    Eww, why would he admit that?
  13. by   mother/babyRN
    He must be an evolved man....Or, one with many sisters...Used to embarrasing bonding tales.

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