Having trouble getting pregnant...getting worried.... - page 3

Here's my story in a nutshell. I have 3 children: 9, 4, 18 months. My husband and I would like a large family, and I didn't have problems getting pregnant with my other children. We have been... Read More

  1. by   crankyasanoldma
    Quote from mother/babyRN
    When you aren't so focused on it, it will happen...BELIEVE ME, my "infertile" husband and "infertile" self had three children in three years once we stopped thinking about it..
    So, just relaxing will unblock tubes and cause sperm to swim? Wow, how come the Doctors and patients don't know this (sarcasm alert)?
  2. by   sbic56
    Quote from jemommy
    Children are a gift from God. Have you ever considered the fact that He may not be ready for you to conceive another. Make sure you talk with Him. Count the blessings that you DO have. Stress less. Relax. and all things will happen within time.
    Your "give it to god" response was quite appropriate for this poster as it is clear she is religious by the tagline. I do hope you'd be cautious about giving that "advice" to just anyone though, as it may not be so appreciated.
  3. by   jkaee
    Quote from sbic56
    Your "give it to god" response was quite appropriate for this poster as it is clear she is religious by the tagline. I do hope you'd be cautious about giving that "advice" to just anyone though, as it may not be so appreciated.

    While I do appreciate the thoughts behind jemommy's response, I do have to agree with you and others also. While my tagline does show that I am a religious person, I posted to find out what "medical" reasons there might be that would cause me to have trouble getting pregnant again. I don't think people realize how hurtful (however unintentional it may be) it is to hear "You should be thankful for what you have.......it will happen.....give it time....give it to God....give it a rest.....etc." esp. when you have been faced with pregnancy loss before. It doesn't matter how many children you already have, if you lose a baby that you wanted desperately, it's devastating. And when you think you are having trouble conceiving, it's a scary thing.

    So, not to turn this into a religious debate, but for everyone out there that expresses well meaning sentiments like those mentioned above, please remember that that's probably not what we want to hear. A lot of time we come here for advice and comfort, but there are times when we just want medical answers to questions we have in areas that we don't know much about. Again, thanks to EVERYONE that replied, I appreciate it.
  4. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I know JUST how you feel jkaee.........
    I have had 4 pregnancy losses in 2 years. People are often struck dumbfounded, unsure what to say but they want to help. So they do say things like "let God handle it.....let go, let God, etc."


    it's not helpful to us, but they don't know it and they mean well. Please remember no one here means wrong or to hurt you, honestly. We all want to help in some way, and some responses are more helpful than others, but take this with you. We ALL care and wish we could help.

    Hang in there and I wish you all good things. I am hoping to read soon you are pregnant and getting big as a horse!!!!!

    Take care hon and vent anytime to me.
  5. by   Stitchie
    Quote from SmilingBluEyes
    I know JUST how you feel jkaee.........
    I have had 4 pregnancy losses in 2 years. People are often struck dumbfounded, unsure what to say but they want to help. So they do say things like "let God handle it.....let go, let God, etc."


    it's not helpful to us, but they don't know it and they mean well. Please remember no one here means wrong or to hurt you, honestly. We all want to help in some way, and some responses are more helpful than others, but take this with you. We ALL care and wish we could help.

    Hang in there and I wish you all good things. I am hoping to read soon you are pregnant and getting big as a horse!!!!!

    Take care hon and vent anytime to me.
    Hi Deb,

    I am truly sorry for your losses. I've been in the same boat. It is the most frustrating thing in the world.

    No one, nothing softens the blow of infertility or pregnancy loss. I've heard these for 5+ years now, just relax, maybe you weren't meant to have children, it's God's decision, this is a message, until I just quit talking about it because it was damaging my self-esteem. As well as my marriage.

    This is a very painful and isolating subject. Everyone has an opinion about it, and sometimes the well-meaning remark is wounding to a woman experiencing the losses.

    Maybe those who work in L&D and see babies popping out all over the place -- that's their job - don't realize what it's like to be a woman and not have a birth story. To those of us who have been damaged by infertility and pregnancy loss don't understand this 'just relax' business because we can't relax about it.

    To the OP: keep us updated. I hope you have good news for us soon.
  6. by   jkaee
    I know this is probably to early to say anything.....but I got a positive pregnancy test a couple weeks ago. I "feel" pregnant, but I just can't shake the fear that something will happen this time, too. I'm very happy, but guarded, esp. with my history and my mom's and sister's history with miscarriages and pregnancy problems. And, of course, I KNEW once I posted to you guys and talked to my doctor about my concerns, I'd get pregnant and sound like an over-reacting idiot..... :chuckle That always happens with me.....I go out and buy a super sized box of tampons and pads, and then I wind up pregnant!

    We haven't told many people yet, just waiting to see what happens....last time I miscarried it was on Thanksgiving, and I had to hear everyone congratulating me on my pregnancy when we weren't sure what was happening. My husband was away with the kids visiting family out of state and I had to drive myself to the ER 2 times over the weekend when I started bleeding heavily.....what a holiday to remember. Ok, enough negativity....happy thoughts..... :chuckle

    I'll keep you guys updated....I don't go to see the doctor until June 7 (they keep you waiting longer and longer nowadays before they'll see you!) so we'll see what happens between now and then. Once again, thank you ALL for your support, and Deb, thanks for understanding and being there!


    Jennifer
  7. by   CHATSDALE
    Some Practical Advise Is Lose Weight If You Have Gained Some With Your Other Pregs And To Limit Intercourse Before Your Fertility Time So As To Give Sperm Time To Build Up Doucing With Baking Soda May Help Also Follow Up With A Clear Water Douche After Word Will Prevent Any Irritation
  8. by   crankyasanoldma
    That is great news!

    Best Wishes!!

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