have you had an abortion? - page 4

I need some advice and was wondering if anyone has ever had an abortion and regretted it? Can you please tell me why you chose abortion and how you came to decide that was the best choice for you. ... Read More

  1. by   TweetiePieRN
    Quote from DOCS RN
    I think you have a lot of nerve to even ask this question in this forum. What you are asking for is very personal and painful information. You should grow up and take this problem that you have to your priest (clergy), your partner, possibly your parents, your GYN and a good counselor. The information these important people have just may be able to help you sort it all out.
    YOU have a lot of nerve to even berate the OP, especially since you are a newbie to THIS forum. Your post was extremely insensitive. Maybe you are the one who needs to "grow up". Nobody is being forced to post "very personal and painful information." All information put out here is voluntary.
  2. by   nekhismom
    nobody's being forced to say anything. as i said before, if one has a very strong opinion about a topic and can not discuss it in a rational, non-judgemental way, then one should simply avoid that topic.

    not picking on anyone, here. this is just a little reminder. please remember not to attack others. especially if you disagree with them!!!!!

    personal attacks are against the tos, which can be found at:
    http://allnurses.com/forums/showthread.php?t=31788
  3. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Oh Docs, NURSES are on that list of "very important people", along with clergy and doctors you already mention, you know. Just thought you might like a reminder........
    have a great day all.
  4. by   Sheri257
    Well, I didn't have an abortion, but I was in the same situation. I put a baby girl up for adoption several years ago, after my boyfriend at the time lied about having a vasectomy and told me I didn't need to use birth control (obviously I was very young and believed him.) I didn't have any money, and the boyfriend skipped town as soon as he found out I was pregnant. My family was very upset and made it clear they wouldn't support me, financially or otherwise, and they refused to even speak to me, so I was pretty much on my own.

    Even though it was an incredibly difficult and painful experience, I knew I would feel so much better years later if I didn't have an abortion. I don't hold it against anyone else for making that decision or judge them, and I'm not a religious person either. I just knew I personally couldn't live with it. Several years later, I'm pretty happy with my decision, although it's still emotional for me. Now that my daughter is an adult, I'm grappling with the question of whether I should attempt to get in touch with her or not.

    Last edit by Sheri257 on May 24, '04
  5. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Quote from nekhismom
    nobody's being forced to say anything. as i said before, if one has a very strong opinion about a topic and can not discuss it in a rational, non-judgemental way, then one should simply avoid that topic.

    not picking on anyone, here. this is just a little reminder. please remember not to attack others. especially if you disagree with them!!!!!

    personal attacks are against the tos, which can be found at:
    http://allnurses.com/forums/showthread.php?t=31788
    at that rate it's going anymore, the majority of categories will be set up so that your post has to be reviewed by a mod before it can be public, just like the ce forum.
  6. by   TweetiePieRN
    Quote from LPN2Be2004
    At that rate it's going anymore, the majority of categories will be set up so that your post has to be reviewed by a mod before it can be public, just like the CE forum.
    If that ends up happening I will no longer visit allnurses.com and will stop recommending it to co-workers and friends.
  7. by   mother/babyRN
    I think if the original post had been about opposing or conflicting views on abortion, it would certainly be prudent to discuss the issue. This was a personl thing and therefore really not the forum for discussing viewpoints for or against. In my opinion anyway....But then,It ALWAYS seems to get around to the way people feel about being for or against it.....Injecting that part into a simple query seems a little selfish and selfserving....Of all things, this poster did not need to feel attacked or ostrasized, and those of us upset ( and in some ways, appropriately so) when a discussion is moderated because it is no longer "feel good", what are ya gonna do? All "discussion" groups are jumping on that bandwagon these days.....Too bad....But that is the way it is.....
  8. by   Energizer Bunny
    Yep, it's too bad that we can't all remember that everyone has a viewpoint and that everyone's thoughts/feelings are valid. I try to put myself in that person's position before I respond, hoping that others would do the same when they respond to me.
  9. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    That's why i kept my replies at "you do what's best for you". My opinion on abortion doesn't have any place on this thread. Just because i would feel a certain way does not mean that this is the best thing for the OP. Nor would i even DARE to say "oh please do_______". Their choice, no matter what the OP decides, it's really NOB (no one business).
  10. by   mother/babyRN
    I too have left more than one "discussion" group when actual discussions were deemed unacceptable...Sigh....
  11. by   nekhismom
    I'm NOT gonna shut down this thread or start moderating these posts here, not at this point. I just want to remind everyone to be civil.

    As some of you have pointed out, you have very strong beliefs about this topic. THe VAST majority of the posters here have responded very maturely and have been quite supportive. Thank you, you know who you are.

    But it seems like everytime an abortion topic is brought up, it gets really ugly, and name calling begins, then feelings get hurt, and it goes down hill from there.

    So far, this thread has been pretty mild compared to some of the other threads on abortion. And I would like to see it remain that way. That's why I posted the reminder to be nice!

    Open discussion is always allowed, and threads are not shut down just because they don't "feel good" on this forum. If threads are closed, it's because they get downright ugly. This thread is not ugly, and will remain open.

    Thanks to everyone who is civil and respectful of others. Have a nice day, y'all.
  12. by   ?burntout
    Quote from cutecat
    I need some advice and was wondering if anyone has ever had an abortion and regretted it? Can you please tell me why you chose abortion and how you came to decide that was the best choice for you. I am currently facing the question of abortion myself but I don't think I can go through with it. I don't personally know anyone who has had one who I can talk to about this. Anything would be appreciated; I would not judge anyone.
    I have never been in your situation, so I don't know what to tell you other than to talk with someone you trust (a close family member, a friend) or a counselor to help decide. This decision is totally up to you...whether others think it is right or wrong, or people are going to be angry or sad, you have to do what is best for you. Another thing would be to look at the websites that have been suggested...it might give you some additional insight.

    I wish you peace in whatever decision you make...
  13. by   kmchugh
    I have realized there is one piece of advice I can offer. There are people out there, on both sides of this issue, whose views can best be described as malignant. These people are going to advise you to follow one path or another, not because that path is what is best for you, but because that advice fits their own personal agenda, your needs be damned.

    Where ever possible, avoid these people. You will already know what they are going to say, so their advice won't be any help anyway. Regardless of what they tell you, they are not there to help you. If they sense that you are going to follow the path that they don't want you to follow, they will try everything they can think of to change your mind. They will yell, scream, and lay every guilt trip on you they can think of. You are going through enough, without adding this to the burden.

    Kevin McHugh

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