Female Or Male Ob/gyn- Which Do You Prefer? - page 2

Hi, I have used a male OB/Gyn ever since I started going to see one (oh about 20 years or so). I have never been to a female doctor. I have friends who swear by them. They say only a female... Read More

  1. by   julieK
    Quote from JUSTYSMOM
    Hi,

    I have used a male OB/Gyn ever since I started going to see one (oh about 20 years or so). I have never been to a female doctor. I have friends who swear by them. They say only a female doctor could really understand what they are feeling. They would NEVER go to a male doctor. Others (like myself) prefer male doctors. Maybe it's phychological on my part? I don't know why, but the thought of another female poking around in there makes me uncomfortable.

    Who do you prefer? Is there really that much of a difference? Are female doctors more sensitive than males? Or is that dependant on the doctor? I thought my male doctor was sensitive, thoughtful and caring. He also had a great sense of humor. Who do you work for?

    The reason why I am asking this is I have recently moved. There is an all female practice about 5 minutes away from me. My regular doctor is a good 25 minutes. I don't know if it is worth the switch or just stay with him.

    Thanks
    Jules

    I have never understood folks who say that a male OB couldn't "understand" what we go through. So what? Is it a requirement for your oncologist to have had cancer?

    -Julie
  2. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Quote from julieK
    I have never understood folks who say that a male OB couldn't "understand" what we go through. So what? Is it a requirement for your oncologist to have had cancer?

    -Julie
    excellent point!
  3. by   Daysleeper
    My gyn is relocating and I am devastated! He is the kindest most gentle physician I have ever seen. He's not bad on the eyes either!
  4. by   camay1221_RN
    So true!

    I have a male OB/GYN, and I wouldn't trade him for nothing! There are many female OB/GYN's I dealt with in PP that I would have delivered at home before I let any of them near me or my baby!


    Quote from julieK
    I have never understood folks who say that a male OB couldn't "understand" what we go through. So what? Is it a requirement for your oncologist to have had cancer?

    -Julie
  5. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I could see how someone could say that a male might not understand (not referring to all, here). I have an aunt who suffered with pelvic pain for a year and had 1 male gyn tell her to quit making stories up, another said she needed a shrink, and finally she found (a female doc) who took care of the problem (endometriosis). My aunt swears she'll never go to another male gyn again. Granted she's generalizing that they're all dismissive, but i saw her doubled over in pain several times, and getting dismissed as a head case sometimes sends people in their ways.
  6. by   julieK
    Quote from LPN2Be2004
    I could see how someone could say that a male might not understand (not referring to all, here). I have an aunt who suffered with pelvic pain for a year and had 1 male gyn tell her to quit making stories up, another said she needed a shrink, and finally she found (a female doc) who took care of the problem (endometriosis). My aunt swears she'll never go to another male gyn again. Granted she's generalizing that they're all dismissive, but i saw her doubled over in pain several times, and getting dismissed as a head case sometimes sends people in their ways.

    That is an awful story, but, again, I don't feel it proves anything. You may make the argument that females are, in general, more understanding as health care professionals. However, in that case, one should claim that she would only rather go to female MD's, OB/GYN or otherwise.

    -Julie
  7. by   kids
    I have never had a female provider (Gyn or PCP) that I was comfortable with, in fact, I just "fired" my female PCP after 3 years because I feel like she has never listened to me.

    I would not trade my (male) OB/Gyn for anything, I have been with him for almost 20 years. Annual exams are so quick there isn't time to be embarrassed and for the first time in my life, painless, honestly, I hardly notice when he does it. I am a more than little biased. This doctor who cared for me and at times cried with me thru several 16-20 week losses and eventually a hyst for cancer. When I was in school 15 years ago I went into the rotation with a lot of anxiety. He was the doc on the first 3 deliveries I was in on (2 vag, 1 cs), knowing my history he spent a lot of time on me. I am not sure I would have survived the rotation without him.

    When my daughter's water broke & she went into labor early she very anxous as she had not yet met anyone in the practice except her OB. My doc was the on-call for the practice and he did a wonderful job with her (and her baby).
    I will never forget the look of agony on his face when the baby went bad after birth (or the relief on his face when he saw the same baby, completely healthy at 14 months).
    Last edit by kids on Jul 2, '04
  8. by   RNBSN1
    My preference is for a female OB/GYN.
  9. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Quote from julieK
    That is an awful story, but, again, I don't feel it proves anything. You may make the argument that females are, in general, more understanding as health care professionals. However, in that case, one should claim that she would only rather go to female MD's, OB/GYN or otherwise.

    -Julie
    I'm not making the arguement that one gender is better understainding than the other. What i am saying is that to me, personally, i want someone who knows what they're doing. But i can understand another's reasoning on why they feel one gender is (fill in the blank here) than the other.
  10. by   Chaya
    It all depends on the individual for me- professional manner and accessability. I have had MD's of each gender that were patient, compassionate and knowledgable and MD's of both genders that were abrupt, rough and arrogant. One difference I have noticed around here is it takes longer to get to see a female MD due to higher demand, and there have been several times for me when an extra 2-3 week wait was not possible!
  11. by   lisamc1RN
    Neither! I try my best to avoid all OB/GYN's! :chuckle That being said, if I need to have a female problem taken care of, I want an excellent, compassionate, caring, competent FEMALE. Why? Because I feel more comfortable, safer with a female. I feel very vulnerable when I have my clothes off, and a female doc, with the qualities listed, eases this a bit.
  12. by   bluesky
    You know as yet another woman survivor of sexual assault, you'd think I'd prefer a female.... I can't STAND getting massaged by a male. Yet my OB/GYN is a great, gentle and professional MAN. I have no gender preference for my providers as I have my share of bad clinicians in both genders.
  13. by   Spidey's mom
    I agree with Deb . .. caring, compassionate and competent are among the things I look for and gender, in my experience has had little to do with it.

    My first exam at 18 was with a male physician who was very kind and walked me through an embarrassing event. My mom and grandma had scared me so much that when I was sitting in the room talking to the doc, he asked me when my hives started. I looked down and sure enough, fear had made me break out in hives. He was so very nice when I told him my fears.

    I had a female ob/gyn with my first son. Her husband was her business manager. She was booked so solidly that you rarely saw her for more than 5 minutes. She was distracted and I didn't bond with her at all. My delivery was almost robotic in terms of her bedside manner.

    My next two kids were delivered by two different male docs. Great experiences!

    I go to an all woman group now . . PA, NP, Physician. They also are RUSHED RUSHED RUSHED. I get the fastest pap/pelvic exams . . . never much of a peep about how I'm doing. They also delivered my last child. It was an emergency cesarean so I didn't much care about bedside manner . .just competency.

    Gender, for me, makes no difference.

    steph
    Last edit by Spidey's mom on Jul 2, '04

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