Cover Letter Help

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Hi everyone! I would like advice and/or suggestions to improve my cover letter for a New Grad RN program. I'm struggling to find a good balance in providing as much info about my experience/qualifications as I can without being too wordy. When I read my letter aloud, it doesn't seem to flow naturally. What do you guys think? I would appreciate any feedback greatly! :)

Start of Letter:

My compassion for children battling cancer was evident as a capstone preceptee in a Pediatric Hematology/Oncology Unit. I always came in driven by my passion to support patients and families through their toughest, most vulnerable times and to celebrate victories against life-threatening diseases. As a BSN graduate from School, I intend to fulfill a personally and professionally rewarding role in your New Graduate Registered Nurse Program.

Your commitment to scientific excellence resonates with me. That is what I strive for in my own career. Through my capstone project on oral mucositis, I educated patients, families and staff on current evidence-based oral rinse guidelines to reduce oncologic complications and achieve optimal outcomes. I am an ambitious learner who welcomes challenges and seeks improvement, which led to my pursuit of a nursing externship at Magnet® recognized Hospital. I was frequently commended for being the only student selected from California.

During my senior preceptorship, I adapted quickly, integrated with various healthcare professionals and considered all aspects of patient life in response to illness and treatment. In under eight weeks, I took on responsibility of three patients independently. The remarkable levels of professionalism, critical thinking and prioritization that I acquired through my experiences would make a valuable contribution to your efforts in eliminating cancer. In addition, I aim to continue my formal education and participate in research and philanthropy opportunities to continue serving our communities.

I value the chance to discuss how I can contribute further. I may be contacted by phone or by email. Thank you for your time and attention to my application.

End of Letter

Specializes in Pedi.

I agree, it doesn't sound natural.

In general, cover letters should follow the following format:

1st Paragraph- who you are, what position you are applying for and why.

2nd Paragraph- why you are a good fit for the position

3rd Paragraph- closing/thank you for taking the time to read this letter, how to reach you, etc.

I think cover letters are outdated and didn't even write one for the job I currently hold nor the one that was my second choice before I accepted this one. I definitely didn't write one for my last job since I didn't even apply for that job, I applied for a different job with the same employer. As a new grad, it might be necessary though.

I agree, it doesn't sound natural.

In general, cover letters should follow the following format:

1st Paragraph- who you are, what position you are applying for and why.

2nd Paragraph- why you are a good fit for the position

3rd Paragraph- closing/thank you for taking the time to read this letter, how to reach you, etc.

I think cover letters are outdated and didn't even write one for the job I currently hold nor the one that was my second choice before I accepted this one. I definitely didn't write one for my last job since I didn't even apply for that job, I applied for a different job with the same employer. As a new grad, it might be necessary though.

Thanks for the help!! I'll rewrite my letter using that format. I really need that guidance.

That's so awesome that you didn't have to write cover letters! I wish I didn't have to write them either, but every new grad program I come across requires one. :( These are my weaknesses!

Specializes in Med/Surg/Infection Control/Geriatrics.
Start of Letter:

My compassion for children battling cancer was evident as a capstone preceptee in a Pediatric Hematology/Oncology Unit. I always came in driven by my passion to support patients and families through their toughest, most vulnerable times and to celebrate victories against life-threatening diseases. As a BSN graduate from School, I intend to fulfill a personally and professionally rewarding role in your New Graduate Registered Nurse Program.

Your commitment to scientific excellence resonates with me. That is what I strive for in my own career. Through my capstone project on oral mucositis, I educated patients, families and staff on current evidence-based oral rinse guidelines to reduce oncologic complications and achieve optimal outcomes. I am an ambitious learner who welcomes challenges and seeks improvement, which led to my pursuit of a nursing externship at Magnet® recognized Hospital. I was frequently commended for being the only student selected from California.

During my senior preceptorship, I adapted quickly, integrated with various healthcare professionals and considered all aspects of patient life in response to illness and treatment. In under eight weeks, I took on responsibility of three patients independently. The remarkable levels of professionalism, critical thinking and prioritization that I acquired through my experiences would make a valuable contribution to your efforts in eliminating cancer. In addition, I aim to continue my formal education and participate in research and philanthropy opportunities to continue serving our communities.

I value the chance to discuss how I can contribute further. I may be contacted by phone or by email. Thank you for your time and attention to my application.

End of Letter

Your letter shares some very good information, but I must agree with my colleague KelRN215.

But I would like to add, outdated though they may be, they are more professional when applying than not. It shows you made an effort to be professional and courteous.

You might save the rest of the info for the interview. Best to you!

Your letter shares some very good information, but I must agree with my colleague KelRN215.

But I would like to add, outdated though they may be, they are more professional when applying than not. It shows you made an effort to be professional and courteous.

You might save the rest of the info for the interview. Best to you!

Thank you!! :) I'll definitely share my info in the interviews, if I get to that point.

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