Nurse Fights for License After Sex With Dying Patient - Page 19Register Today!
- Jan 27, '11 by hecallsmeDuchessWhen I read stories like this, I'm amazed first of all that it can happen. I don't get what it is that people find attractive in a sick person, whether they are in the hospital or at home. A sick person is in a very bad place, bodily functions misbehaving and all such things just going on at the same time. Yet these are the people that some nurses/aides/physicians happen to fall in love with. How does that happen? Are these people somehow so lacking in self-esteem that this is the only way they think they can get acceptance? I find it disgusting to say the least.
I think this nurse should receive some sort of punishment but not only that, I think she may very well need psych evaluations done. The reason I say this is because I don't think (or I haven't read yet that) she has offered any type of apologies which tells me that she somehow thinks she has done nothing wrong in this case. And that terrifies me! Even if the man involved were somehow culpable, how is that this nurse could not make a better judgment call in this case?
No need to be disrespectful but what with the veggie joke.. :down but no professional person such as physicians, nurses , physical therapists, psychologists etc., do not need to have sexual relationships with their patients. Its taught in bioethics courses and its taught in life. This is a slippery slope to take a stand on. Professionals should be professional and not cross the line otherwise vulnerable people will be hurt. Otherwise we are not above a person who acts on every urge they get.
When you are ill you are vulnerable in many ways I see it all the time as a nurse. Some people will even give up their own sense of control to the nurse and I tell them they have to choose its not up to me. This man was dying the dying can be taken advantage of emotionally and its a nurse's responsibility to guard against crossing that line. I think the Oklahoma BON was right this woman has questionable ethics I dont care if the man was married or single. You simply dont have sex with patients . Real black and white to me. She is getting a slap on the hand. If a man had done this as a prior poster had said he would probably be accused of being a sex offender or predator.
- Eriksoln thats different the sister is not your patient.. If she was interested in you there is nothing wrong with that and I really dont think said person in Oklahoma gets on Allnurses .com LOL
What I dont get about the woman is the whining that she has had a travesty of injustice well whether she gets her license back or not she will have a hard time getting work in Oklahoma if at all. I lived there and worked as a RN there and people forget nothing and neither does the BON.
- Quote from losernurseBtW and then I am leaving this post as I am losing my temper no a man does not have the absolute right to stick his penis (cant you use the correct term or do you know it ?) into anyone otherwise it would be ok to rape women or men or sexually abuse children. I love how people can look at an issue so broadly and say things like that . No one has the right to do anything that hurts another. You dont get it most of us dont become nurses to go shopping for sex partners.. its a little pathetic besides wrong when you are licensed in the state of OKlahoma they give you a copy of the rules of the BON. Apparently she didnt read them.. too bad but I wouldnt have to read them to know its wrong to have sex with someone you care for and take care of physically as a nurse to mess up my life and theirs and the man's family. Just myGreat, another battle over semantics. How do I define the word "the". The guy has a "right" or ability, or entitlement, or desire or whatever you want to call it, to stick his d@#$ into whomever he chooses. The woman has the same. Is cheating a cruel and thoughtless and "immoral" thing to do? Yes. Stick to the issue. These two, however wicked and vicious they are in their actions and dealings with others, and especially this woman, however "strange", did nothing that made her a criminal, IF the man was of SANE/SOUND MIND. People are starting to argue morals versus legality. This woman should not be punished in this way for her lapse in "morality". She should be ostracized and ridiculed, but not punished legally. It is UNETHICAL for the state board to take her license... though she should look at it as a blessing in disguise when it comes down to it. Get a job at Red Robin. Flippin' burgers q2 minutes versus flipping assorted veggies q2 hours? Hmm. Tough choice. Gonna have to think about that one.Last edit by Psychtrish39 on Jan 27, '11 : Reason: left out a word
- Jan 27, '11 by kbrn2002Quote from caroladybelleThanks for the heads up. As offensive as that "flipping veggies" statement was, I will try my best in the future to refrain from feeding his ego by responding.The "T" word is frowned on by the mods.......
Though if it walks like a duck and quacks like duck.......
- Jan 29, '11 by nursenowQuote from HorseshoeOh I understand it very well. I have no problem with them convicting her for that behavior. I totaly agree with you that it is wrong. But 20 years for sex? MDs kill patients by poor decisions, nurses abuse and steal narcotics from their patient, among other things against non-consenting patients and they at least get a chance to redeem themselves and continue in healthcare. Have sex with a consenting adult patient and your career is over?nursenow,
Please explain how having sex in the patient's home (where she worked as a hospice nurse) was "away from the work place?!"
What part of the Oklahoma Practice Act which states that nurses may NOT have sex with patients under their care (and yes, hospice nursing is an ongoing assignment, not a 9-5 obligation) do you not understand?
She was wrong, no doubt about it. but to end her career? I have spent time at the BON site looking at charges and punishments against nurses for various offenses and find the punishment they administered to this nurses totaly out of line compared to many crimes/punishments you will see levied by the state against nurses for patient abuse, drug theft/use, DUI and the list goes on. Including offenses that actually put people's lives in danger. I believe the punishment was a result of the culture in that state based on having lived there for a number of years. Totaly out of line.
- Jan 29, '11 by Horseshoe^^^Yes, I believe 20 years is really better than she deserves. It wasn't "just sex." She left this entire family devastated. I think permanent revocation would have been more appropriate.
The other examples you provided of nurses abusing their position say to me that the BON in Oklahoma is just too lenient in general. The answer to the problem of giving nurses who commit those other acts is not to back off sex offenses. This nurse should not be treated leniently simply because nurses have gotten away with X, Y, and Z. The BON needs to apply harsher penalties for those abuses as well. In other words, attention should not be paid to lessening this nurse's penalty, but to applying appropriate consequences to all abuses committed by nurses.
- Jan 29, '11 by nursemarionQuote from Spidey's momI am not saying it is ok, I said it is immoral. Still, there are always many side to every story. No one knows what his married life was like but him. Relationships are complicated. He must have been going through all the things that we go through in life only very quickly. Many men have a mid life crisis and have an affair. Is this what he was doing? I don't know, it is no doubt a complicated story. She obviously had problems, but so did he. I think the whole thing is so sad and creepy.Maybe part of the problem here is that people aren't reading at least the entire article.
Yes, this happened when she was employed.
Regardless, you cannot quit and then take up with a patient . . . . not to mention a patient who is married. And dying.
Heron says she's heard you must wait at least a year and I heard in a class on boundaries that there is nothing in writing exactly but 2 years is a good start.