Midwife delivers baby, takes husband. - page 3

What was this midwife thinking? Get thee back to ethics class! :down:... Read More

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    People who do not have a grasp on morality, will simply not be able to understand why the midwife's behavior violated a code of ethics.
    The good thing is that morality can be taught and learned.

    The midwife violated the trust placed in her by the family she assisted. It was ethically and morally wrong.

    The above is not in any way meant to offend, and I apologize in advance for any hard feelings it may cause.
    markkuss, Mrs. SnowStormRN, Otessa, and 2 others like this.

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  2. 1
    Quote from imintrouble
    People who do not have a grasp on morality, will simply not be able to understand why the midwife's behavior violated a code of ethics.
    The good thing is that morality can be taught and learned.

    The midwife violated the trust placed in her by the family she assisted. It was ethically and morally wrong.

    The above is not in any way meant to offend, and I apologize in advance for any hard feelings it may cause.
    No reason to and try passive aggressively insult me. I don't see what is wrong with questioning morality. Thanks Silverdragon102, your post helps some. I am not trying to argue that is morally okay for the midwife to do what she did. I was just looking for a concrete violation. I'm aware that things have to be handled on an individual case, but I was looking for information like Silverdragon102 was able to provide.
    sunkissed75 likes this.
  3. 1
    To Trenia:
    I meant no insult. You are the same age as my daughter, and we simply don't think alike. We don't have the same values. We don't think the same things are important or worthwhile. We come from different times and have been molded by different events. I was taught about ethics and morals from my parents. My daughter didn't learn about those things from me, even though I tried to teach her what I felt was valuable. She learned from her friends and TV. It's the phenomenon I witness here time and time again. The younger posters simply don't view the area of ethics the same as those who are older. That observation is not absolute, but it does occur more times than not.

    Words on a screen are a less than optimal way to communicate. That's why I now place a disclaimer on my posts when I truly mean no harm. I did not mean an insult.
    Mrs. SnowStormRN likes this.
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    at first i agreed with trenia but after reading rn/writer and silverdragon102 posts i have to say i changed my mind.
    your professional relationship with a patient and her family doesn't end once your job is done. plus then i read the part where the midwife looked up the husband on facebook and that to me is a huge no-no. you just don't do that.
    i especially liked this quote by silverdragon102:
    "in the event of a complaint it will be for the nurse or midwife to show that he or she has not abused or exploited any professional relationship. "
    which this midwife clearly did.

    the wife is better off i think. once a cheater, always a cheater. my two cents.
  5. 0
    Okay I just have to say this.

    That husband was a grown human being. Unless the midwife drugged him, locked him in her car trunk, and kept him tied up against his will then he was not "taken." I just hate when that is said. It makes it seem like it is all the midwife's fault. Unless he is pretty mentally unstable he cannot be taken. He left because he wanted.

    If my husband ever becomes "takeable" then whoever wants him can have him. And believe me, he feels the same way if I become "takeable."
  6. 0
    This is an interesting issue. Obviously both parties are dirt bags (midwife+husband) in this situation...but:

    Would the situation change if it was 5 years from now? (the article stated 8 months or so). 20 years? Is there an acceptable time length? What about if the couple got divorced first with no infidelity?
  7. 0
    Omg people cheating on their spouses? unbelievable!! Thank god this is only an isolated case and not a common practice in our society. Ok enough sarcasm. Why is this even news? You want stories about people being immoral just stick your head out the window.
  8. 5
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti....html?ITO=1490

    Here's an article that supplies a bit more information.

    It makes it seem like it is all the midwife's fault. Unless he is pretty mentally unstable he cannot be taken. He left because he wanted.
    The husband most definitely has blame in this as a person and as terrible marital partner. But the midwife has extra blame as a professional. We who see patients and families at their most vulnerable need to be able to set good boundaries regardless of what the other person does.

    Would the situation change if it was 5 years from now? (the article stated 8 months or so). 20 years? Is there an acceptable time length? What about if the couple got divorced first with no infidelity?
    The article states that the midwife added both husband and wife on Facebook just days after the birth. The husband then began saying that he was staying overnight at friends' houses when, apparently, he was staying with the midwife. He moved in with her after five months of sneaking around.

    The usual length of time to wait before beginning a personal relationship is one year after ending the professional relationship. That gives the parties a better chance to meet on equal footing and see each other more realistically.

    If the man had been divorced apart from anything the midwife had done and they together had not chosen to betray her trust, the situation would be different.

    Why is this even news? You want stories about people being immoral just stick your head out the window.
    It isn't the fact that two people decided to do something immoral that's raising eyebrows here. Unfortunately, that's all too common. It's the idea that a medical professional turned her back on the ethical standards that a lot of us adhere to and betrayed her patient in the process that is so appalling. When you enter people's personal lives you have an obligation not to take advantage of that intimate access for your own purposes.

    The husband is a personal and marital failure. BTW, he left his wife on Mother's Day.

    The midwife is a personal and professional failure. She has three children, two of them with the long-time boyfriend she broke up with to be with the other woman's husband.

    It's disturbing to see a ho-hum attitude toward professional ethics. Is this not being taught anymore? Has life just become a free-for-all with even professional people tossing responsibility out the window if they feel like doing something? I really hope not.


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