Bill Would Let Patients Pick Nurse Gender - page 8

JUNEAU, Alaska -- Faith Myers, an Anchorage woman with schizophrenia, has been in and out of mental institutions since 2000. She said she felt violated during the time she spent at the Alaska... Read More

  1. by   Sis123
    Ok then. :stone
  2. by   Tweety
    Quote from earle58
    sorry tweety but i must respectfully disagree.
    even though i haven't read any statistics, there are a number of women who have been either raped or sexually molested as children by their male perpetrators.
    the thought of a male md or male nurse performing anything that exposes my genitalia, literally breaks me out in a sweat and i am totally rendered incapable of making any intellectual decisions....i am humiliated and much more. as a child, when one is repeatedly sexually molested and sodomized by a dozen men, with everyone watching and laughing and treating you like a wild animal, you are humiliated. and no matter how irrational your decision for a female md/np/nurse is, there's a reason for it and not always a matter of modesty or prudishness. the same type of rationale also applies to the many, many women/girls who have been raped.

    when i was giving birth to josh, my female ob wasn't there so a male ob came to deliver; he tried to see how dilated i was. i crossed my legs as tightly as possible and told him in no uncertain terms that i will have this baby by myself if he dares to come near me. he saw the panic in my eyes and heard it in my tone....they got a female ob stat as i delivered literally 3 minutes later.
    unreasonable? ridiculous? only to those who don't know my hx.

    leslie

    I stand corrected. The idea that most females prefer female nurses because of feelings of humiliation around male caregivers is a foreign idea to me and I apologize for not talking abuse into consideration.

    I'd like to think I'd know the difference between a profressional examination and a rape. (And yes, I have been raped by a man once.) But I certainly don't stand in judgement of people who feel humilated by the presence of an MD or Nurse, just because it's strange to me.

    That this doctor respected your feelings is what is important here. No law mandated him to leave the room. He profressionally stepped away.
  3. by   Tweety
    Quote from Sis123

    When there are several nurses on a med surg floor, why can't a patient have a same sex nurse if it is an issue, at least for peri-care/ caths, etc?

    Do you even have to ask a question like that? In this thread alone over and over it was stated that the preferences of the patient are first and foremost considered.
  4. by   leslie :-D
    Quote from mattsmom81
    Leslie (((HUGS))) and thank you for sharing...your story helps nurses understand, to avoid judging, and work with compassion. Knowing how many incest and rape survivors are out there, we must be sure we are helping our patients feel safe.
    the reason i disclosed what i did is that one never knows what a person has endured in their life; thankfully you guys respect a pt's wishes, not even questioning why they'd prefer someone of their own gender....but as it has been demonstrated here, thankfully all of you DO indeed, respect such requests; and it's not always a matter of being modest. even if it was, it should still be respected.

    i remember one time a male pt would not allow me to catheterize him- we had no male nurses and we were pretty close in age. so i told him i understood; told him the repercussions of not being catheterized and he said he fully understood. the nurse i was working with that noc, was considered to be a bitter, old woman by her colleagues, yet she and i got along well. i told her about my patient- she walked in with the cath kit and he allowed her to do it. so i'm wondering if it was because we were so close in age; or if it was this nurse's no-nonsense demeanor that disinhibited him; or even her age (in her late 60's), who knows? had he refused the catheterization from her, then i would have called the md and said he refused, and have him come in to do it. you just never know the why's.

    leslie
  5. by   nursesinabox
    Quote from caroladybelle
    Good Grief!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    They don't want to pass laws to guarantee sufficient numbers of qualified staff, but they will legislate gender.

    What are they going to do to enforce it...do a chromesome test or make us flash our privates to prove ourselves worthy of caring for a patient?

    I have worked plenty of units with no male staff whatsoever.

    Um...I don't think what they're referring to here is the lack of male staff...if anything, it's women who don't want men coming in their rooms and cleaning their privates...it's bad enough having another woman do it! For God sake! Would you really have the "good grief" attitude and not relate towards a woman who is too modest/uncomfortable to have a man touch her naked body??? I agree that there are a million more important things the gov't should be busy ameliorating, and that these issues should be left up to the staff, but if WE were doing a decent job allowing patients to keep their dignity, THEY wouldn't have to step in.
  6. by   nursesinabox
    Quote from Tweety
    I stand corrected. The idea that most females prefer female nurses because of feelings of humiliation around male caregivers is a foreign idea to me and I apologize for not talking abuse into consideration.

    I'd like to think I'd know the difference between a profressional examination and a rape. (And yes, I have been raped by a man once.) But I certainly don't stand in judgement of people who feel humilated by the presence of an MD or Nurse, just because it's strange to me.

    That this doctor respected your feelings is what is important here. No law mandated him to leave the room. He profressionally stepped away.

    I am very sorry to hear about both of your horrible encounters. If I may just return to the original point about whether or not a person has the right to make refusals/requests due to their comfort levels regarding the sex of the person washing them...I must ask why a woman needs to have been violated in order to have a valid excuse for feeling uncomfortable with a man washing her genitals??? Is that not normal even without a Hx??? It's even more of a problem for most Muslim women, we should just get used to it as a patient's right. It's mainly women who have these concerns anyway, so what's the big deal? Nursing is a female-dominated profession, we should have enough of them to remedy this problem shoudn't we?
  7. by   leslie :-D
    Quote from Tweety

    I'd like to think I'd know the difference between a profressional examination and a rape. (And yes, I have been raped by a man once.) But I certainly don't stand in judgement of people who feel humilated by the presence of an MD or Nurse, just because it's strange to me.
    tweety, there are some things in life that no matter how irrational one is, the somatic response (sweating, hyperventilating) is a major indicator that one has NOT healed from events earlier in life. not everyone is strong enough to render themselves capable of differentiating between a professional exam by a male vs. viewing the entire male population as overwhelmingly threatening when it comes to exposing a woman's genetalia. there's no rhyme or reason for me. i can't believe i even have kids!! some people, depending on the severity of abuse, are literally scarred for life. and nurses should always assume the worst if a male or female refuses care from the opposite sex.

    leslie
  8. by   Overland1
    Quote from steelcityrn
    You work with nurses who while giving care they are talking on cell phones? I thought you had to have phones turned off before entering a hospital because of monitors? What kind of hospital doyou work in? Anyway, just so you know, Ihave always made sure the pt was covered at all times and a curtain pulled with the door closed, and cna's always do the same.
    The cell phone/monitors thing has become much less of a problem as the findings have been that cell phones and two-way radios are not really likely to affect the operation of monitors and ECG recorders. Several years ago, some of the phones of that era (anybody recall the old Motorola Flip-phone?) would drive the ECG crazy.... I actually saw this happen in the ER and the person involved was still using the (antique) Flip phone. The newer phones and monitors are not really affected by the phones and radios. The greater concern is privacy.... people on cell phones in a patient room, broadcasting to the masses the details of what is going on with whomever in that room.

    Back to the male/female thing, in an emergent situation, choosing a male or female nurse is not as easy to do. Also, most of the female patients I have seen in hospital and in the field do not have a problem with a male being the care provider. The main consideration is more than likely the manner in which the provider presents himself to the patient. In mental health units (or other areas in which a patient is likely to complain, having a staff "witness" nearby usually keeps bogus complaints at bay.
  9. by   ladypoetess
    Quote from FROGGYLEGS


    Male nurses/CNAs are a rarity at my job as well. I assume this is more for females wanting female nurses. I don't know why, but it seems like it is always the women who don't want male caregivers. The men don't seem to care. I can't think of a single male pt to ever refuse care based on sex, but I guess it happens.

    I have had it happen - I work in a psych hospital, and a man on the geropsychiatry unit had an enlarged testicle that he flatly refused to allow any female nurses OR doctors to look at. The only way we could get an evaluation of it was to get the medical doctor (male) to come in the next day and see the pt.
  10. by   clarkheart
    Everyone has been making some very valid observations on this most delicate subject. As a male nurse working in a very culturally diversified community (esp. Hmong,Laotian,Punjabi,Hispanic), I am very aware of my female patient's feelings toward a man taking care of them. It is not unusual at all for my patients to be unable to speak English. Usually the patient is OK with general care and I will ask a female nurse to bath/peri-care if needed. My utmost concern is always making my patient feel comfortable. I will trade duties with my female nurses whenerver I need them to help me with caring for these patients. I have never had any problems getting my fellow nurses to help me in this.
  11. by   Tweety
    Quote from clarkheart
    I am very aware of my female patient's feelings toward a man taking care of them. ........... I have never had any problems getting my fellow nurses to help me in this.

    Which is how it is with nursing. The presumption that because we are male we have not respect for the "dignity" of the female patient when she is most vulnerable shows this persons ignorance. The sad thing is through fear based rhetoric sometimes the general public buys into stereotypes.
    Last edit by Tweety on Apr 29, '05
  12. by   CapeCodMermaid
    Where I work, we try to respect our patients' wishes,but if they say "no black people or no foreigners" I go in and ask them as to why....some times all we have are black people and "foreigners".
    As an aside: the last time I was in the hospital as a patient, I would have been happy to have ANYONE come help me. I guess they thought that because I was an RN I should have been able to take care of myself...not easy considering the fact that my doctor told me "Do Not Move an Inch!!"
  13. by   edeverges
    as a male nurse working in methadone maintenance. we are constantly observing urine drug screens. i believe our patients do better than average because we actual observe the patient during the process vs. unobserved uds. however many of our patients have a history of sexual abuseso i appreciate the fact that my female counter parts obtain the female uds. when they are not available i reschedule the ramdomised uds.

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