SORRY THIS IS LONG
Eight years ago I lost my license due t a felony conviction of obtaining controlled substances. I made a terrible decision about how to deal with a life crisis during that time and was addicted to pain medications. In 2009 I finally got up the nerve to attempt to get my license reinstated. I didn't try before then because I felt ashamed and unworthy and didn't think I had a chance, but to my surprise and after a lot of hoop jumping and $2700.00, my license was reinstated. I was elated. I had never had an addiction before 8 years ago and never had a problem nor relapse after and went through rehab. I was also able to get my record expunged. The problem I am having now is that no one will hired me. Although I can legally check "no" on the convictions question, there is still an adverse disciplinary action on my license that spells out the whole incident and therefore I have to begin every interview with....."8 years ago...and explain what happened. The problem I now face is that although my record is expunged and my background check comes back clear, I am still being denied employment at every turn. I have been honest with everyone upfront and have even had 4 facilities offer me employment knowing my history, and then take back the offer due to someone on the corporate level saying no. I have sent out 74 resumes in a little over 30 days most with applications attached and a summary of my disciplinary action included and no one is responding. I've been applying and job hunting for 3 months. If I do get lucky and get to meet someone face to face, they will give me all this positive talk about how everyone makes mistakes and it's ok, and then I never hear from them again. The BON told me that hundreds of nurses have these types of things on their records and still can be employed. I feel like I have wasted my time, energy, hopes and a lot of money that I didn't have to spare for nothing. When I finally got my license back, I was so full of hope and optimism. I knew it would be hard having that mark on my record, but I never dreamed it would be like this. I have been comfort eating, depressed and reliving the shame that I've felt for so many years all over again and it is making me want to give up because I just don't know what to do. I have applied for CNA and caregiver positions just to get my foot back in the door and to build trust. I have applied for receptionists' positions in physicians offices and even offered to volunteer at our local hospital in order to establish trust and let them see my work ethic before they hire, but they have all just blown me off, or said we'll call you and I never hear from them. Does anyone have any suggestions or should I just hang it up?
Thanks in advance and sorry to be so down right now.