You want what????

I work in a Level 1 trauma center. One night in the midst of the "ER" chaos, I had a mother bring a perfectly healthy baby to the ER at 0230 because he's sick. She was very vague, but asked the triage medic, triage RN, registration, me, and the doctor all for a work excuse. On discharge I gave her that excuse with little Johnny's name on it as he was my patient. She was furious. "I was here and my boss will not accept this," she screamed. I politely explained our policy was to give excuses for the patient only. She left and called 911 from our lobby to report her rude nurse. The police came and arrested her. I have always wondered what became of her.

I also once had a patient whose complaint was "constipation." When I entered his room he was on all fours on the bed buck naked yelling "don't use no lube, just give it to me straight." Psych saw him quite quickly.

Share some of your "requests" you have recieved.