Thoughts to live by..... - page 2
Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Always read stuff that will make you look... Read More
Nov 7, '01If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
Never pat an animal that has sneaky eyes!
A wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
Deja Moo: The feeling that you have heard this bull.... before.
Nov 7, '01My personal favorite came to me from my Aunt who teaches High School English:
Arguing with a teenager is like mud wrestling a pig-you both get dirty and the pig enjoys it.
Nov 7, '01As useful as a third butt cheek
When I die bury me face down so old so and so can kiss my A#* goodbye...an actual request from a family friend.
If you were to line up 9 good men and 1 SOB up against the wall, I'd pick the SOB every time from my mom
Never have more children than you can afford to raise on your own...again mom
Some days you are the windshield, some days you are the bug.
Nov 9, '01All easy problems have already been solved.
Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidy.
Fertility is hereditary. If your parents didn't have any children, neither will you.
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
If at first you do succeed-try to hide your astonishment.
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?
Indecision is the key to flexibility.
It's easy to get lost in thought if it's not familiar territory to you.
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
Marriage means commitment. Ofcourse, so does insanity.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Punctuality is disappointing if no one is there to appreciate it.
A rolling stone gathers momentum.
Status Quo. Latin for "the mess we're in."
Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins, you can't imagine the smell.
Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining.
Nov 11, '01SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 20 success is . . . having sex.
At age 35 success is . . .having money.
At age 50 success is . . . having money.
At age 60 success is . . . having sex.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
Nov 13, '01Although you try to take one day at a time, sometimes several days may attack you at once.
Nov 16, '01When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.
Live your life in such a manner, that when you die the
world cries and you rejoice!