Things nursing school FAILED to tell us - page 2

Wouldn't it have been great if they told us this stuff in nursing school? NOTE: A LOT OF MINE WERE MEANT FOR LTC NURSES The human body is capable of holding 200 cups of H2O/coffee in your... Read More

  1. by   Jessy_RN
    Quote from Debbie_LPN
    Here's a couple more after my night at work tonight:

    How not to laugh when an escapee gets his/her wheelchair stuck in a muddy ditch across the street.

    How not to laugh when a resident says "I'm going home" and another resident in a wheelchair yells "You stupid a**, you're not going anywhere! You're stuck in this hole like the rest of us"(while 3 family members walk by)!

    Not to turn red when a patient who is pleasuring himself moans and says inappropriate things while his roomate is staring at him.

    AND FINALLY MY FAVORITE:
    They do not teach you what to do if a combative resident hits another resident in the head with her cane and says "That'll knock some sense in ya!".

    ROTFL
  2. by   CseMgr1
    How many times I was told as a student L.P.N. that following graduation we would not have ANYTHING to do with IV's, other than count the drip rate and report it to the Charge Nurse...only to wind up starting IV's, mixing IVABX and hanging piggybacks....not to mention giving an occasional IV Lasix to patients in full CHF.... because the only R.N. in the house was tied up with two simultaneous codes. Welcome to the REAL world, folks!
    Last edit by CseMgr1 on Sep 24, '05
  3. by   ZASHAGALKA
    Well I for one learned that I can handle a lot more things thrown at me at once than I ever thought possible.

    I've learned that sometimes people die, no matter what we do to them.

    I've learned that sometimes people live, no matter what we do to them.

    I've learned to act like I know strangers that come up to me at wal-mart and say, 'Remember, you took care of my dad, 7 yrs ago!'.

    I've learned that the first thing to do in an emergency is to take MY OWN PULSE.

    I've learned to judge the character of my co-workers by how long in the day they wait to give MOM in relationship to MY shift.

    I've learned that, many times, 'be nice' is my mantra to some coworkers.

    I've learned never to say "I'm bored" or "It's slow".

    I've learned that vented patients want to watch on TV basically whatever you want to watch.

    I've learned that anger and denial are the first two stages of grief and to never underestimate the lengths to which some family members will go to embrace those stages.

    I've learned that there are distinct advantages to being allowed to die gracefully.

    I've learned that, regarding supervisors and family members, if it felt good saying it, it was probably the wrong thing to say.

    I've learned that there is a direct relationship to how much of an ER co-pay you have to pay and what exactly constitutes an emergency.

    I've learned that my interpersonal skills are my most often used skills.

    I've learned that family members that 'are going to complain to management' have often complained about so many people that they lost credibility 10 complaints ago - and so I do the right thing and don't consider the consequences.

    I've learned to say "NO, THANKS AGAIN FOR OFFERING, THOUGH" after the 3rd call begging me to come in to work when I wasn't up to coming. And this, btw, SHOULD be taught in school.

    I've learned that there is a direct relationship between how often an administrator shows up in the trenches to how good an administrator they truly are. (my first DON only showed up 1 a year - to promote the Combined Federal Campaign. When I saw her on the floor, I'd comment, 'Oh, it must be CFC time again).

    I've learned that managers that show up for work in uniform are better clinical allies that those that show up in suits.

    I've learned to keep a jar of mentholatum jelly in my locker (a smear up each nostril blocks out all kinds of smells).

    I'll try to think of more later.

    ~faith,
    Timothy.
  4. by   donsterRN
    Quote from ZASHAGALKA
    Well I for one learned that I can handle a lot more things thrown at me at once than I ever thought possible.

    I've learned that sometimes people die, no matter what we do to them.

    I've learned that sometimes people live, no matter what we do to them.

    I've learned to act like I know strangers that come up to me at wal-mart and say, 'Remember, you took care of my dad, 7 yrs ago!'.

    I've learned that the first thing to do in an emergency is to take MY OWN PULSE.

    I've learned to judge the character of my co-workers by how long in the day they wait to give MOM in relationship to MY shift.

    I've learned that, many times, 'be nice' is my mantra to some coworkers.

    I've learned never to say "I'm bored" or "It's slow".

    I've learned that vented patients want to watch on TV basically whatever you want to watch.

    I've learned that anger and denial are the first two stages of grief and to never underestimate the lengths to which some family members will go to embrace those stages.

    I've learned that there are distinct advantages to being allowed to die gracefully.

    I've learned that, regarding supervisors and family members, if it felt good saying it, it was probably the wrong thing to say.

    I've learned that there is a direct relationship to how much of an ER co-pay you have to pay and what exactly constitutes an emergency.

    I've learned that my interpersonal skills are my most often used skills.

    I've learned that family members that 'are going to complain to management' have often complained about so many people that they lost credibility 10 complaints ago - and so I do the right thing and don't consider the consequences.

    I've learned to say "NO, THANKS AGAIN FOR OFFERING, THOUGH" after the 3rd call begging me to come in to work when I wasn't up to coming. And this, btw, SHOULD be taught in school.

    I've learned that there is a direct relationship between how often an administrator shows up in the trenches to how good an administrator they truly are. (my first DON only showed up 1 a year - to promote the Combined Federal Campaign. When I saw her on the floor, I'd comment, 'Oh, it must be CFC time again).

    I've learned that managers that show up for work in uniform are better clinical allies that those that show up in suits.

    I've learned to keep a jar of mentholatum jelly in my locker (a smear up each nostril blocks out all kinds of smells).

    I'll try to think of more later.

    ~faith,
    Timothy.
    Wow. Excellent post. I hope to remember these in my years as a student and after graduation in beginning practice.
  5. by   talaxandra
    Good observations, Timothy!
    I've learned that the one time you dismiss your wolf-crying patient's reports they really do have something wrong this time...
    ... but every time you think there might be something wrong there isn't.
    I've learned that the most frail looking old people have the tightest grips, and aren't afraid to grab at any of your body parts
    I've learned that feeling something wet on my leg, even if I'm showering a patient, is not a good thing
    And finally - for now - I've learned to drink that water/take that toilet break/devour that sandwich now, because there won't be time later
    Last edit by talaxandra on Nov 11, '07 : Reason: typo
  6. by   CseMgr1
    Quote from ZASHAGALKA
    I've learned that family members that 'are going to complain to management' have often complained about so many people that they lost credibility 10 complaints ago - and so I do the right thing and don't consider the consequences.
    Yeppers. My late father used to refer to these people as "crackpots". Just get out of our way, and let us take care of Mom and Pop, OK? Sheesh.... :angryfire
  7. by   ZASHAGALKA
    Let me add while I'm thinking about it:

    I've learned that, just the reverse of cars that never make 'that' noise for the mechanic, no matter how many times my patient denies chest pain overnight, the moment the doc or day shift nurse comes into the room, patients will pipe up "my chest has been hurting ALL NIGHT!"

    And let me name this one Timothy's Razor: "If something goes wrong with a patient, it'll tend to go wrong JUST after I gave report and said it was fine."

    ~faith,
    Timothy.
    Last edit by ZASHAGALKA on Sep 25, '05
  8. by   talaxandra
    Quote from ZASHAGALKA
    Let me add while I'm thinking about it:
    I've learned that, just the reverse of cars that never make 'that' noise for the mechanic, no matter how many times my patient denies chest pain overnight, the moment the doc or day shift nurse comes into the room, patients will pipe up "my chest has been hurting ALL NIGHT!"
    And let me name this one Timothy's Razor: "If something goes wrong with a patient, it'll tend to go wrong JUST after I gave report and said it was fine."
    You are so right, on both fronts.
  9. by   DutchgirlRN
    Quote from ZASHAGALKA
    no matter how many times my patient denies chest pain overnight, the moment the doc or day shift nurse comes into the room, patients will pipe up "my chest has been hurting ALL NIGHT".
    Wow if I had a nickel for everytime that has happened to me I'd be able to retire.
  10. by   grace90
    here's a few more...

    that sometimes the best way to deal with a grouchy co-worker is to chart somewhere else

    that when we're working short-staffed I can't possibly catch everything or give the care that I really want to give

    that we would work short A LOT

    that when I got out of school I would not know everything

    that when I got out of school I really wouldn't know anything except that potassium is never given IV push, noses are suctioned before mouths, and cold water is never used to flush a G or NG or J tube

    that an effective way to deal with being chewed out on the phone by a doctor is to draw funny faces and/or write DSIAB on your report sheet while holding the phone a few inches from your ear until they finish their tyrade (DSIAB= Dr. So-&-So Is A Buttmunch)

    that I have, do and will make big booboos

    how to smile and say sweetly "Can I help you?" when the patient rings for the 50th time on my shift

    that a little extra pampering such as a pillow fluff and a warm blanket does a lot to calm an anxious patient -or family member

    not to be intimidated when I enter a patient room for the first time in a shift and am received with a glare
  11. by   kadokin
    Quote from A476
    I THINK THAT ALL OF THAT IS NEED TO KNOW INFORMATION. HOW DARE THEY NOT SAY SOMETHING ABOUT THAT STUFF. WHEN I START SCHOOL I WILL HAVE ALL OF THOSE QUESTIONS ANSWERED BEFORE I SET FOOT IN A CLINICAL . BUT MAYBE NOT. I HOPE I NEVER RUN INTO PROJECTILE VOMMITTING OR TOO MUCH POOP.
    Keep dreamin'
  12. by   Manley71704LPN
    Quote from Debbie_LPN
    Wouldn't it have been great if they told us this stuff in nursing school?

    NOTE: A LOT OF MINE WERE MEANT FOR LTC NURSES

    The human body is capable of holding 200 cups of H2O/coffee in your bladder....literally.

    We were always instructed "Your body needs sleep to heal, rest, ect...",yeah that's funny.

    Practicing sterile procedures for EVERYTHING is a waste of time(except catheters).

    Of the 40 pts I have, I know what all the side effects of their meds are(yeah, all 50 meds per pt!!!). Oh yeah, and I know the GENERIC-TRADE names too.

    Remember calcuating drip rates for G-tubes??? I don't.

    They won't tell you what a med-cocktail is in school.

    Anyone else wanna share???? :chuckle
    yeah, what they fail to tell you...

    what to say when a pt says "My poop TASTE bitter" Do you think there's something wrong with me? uh yeah! your eating your poop!!!

    or how to explain test results or anything to a pt on their level.....which is unknown day to day.

    Or my favorite.... What if Q's (questions).... What if i'm in pain tomorrow but i has no pain today? you wanted to say "well let's worry about that tomorrow!"

    I Love nursing....everyday is a new and exciting as the first. Nothing surprises me anymore!
  13. by   Ruby Vee
    that a sat probe on the penis doesn't have a very good tracing.

    that a male patient is obsessed with his penis and will attach to it things that ought not to be attached, and will remove from it things which ought to stay attached. (sat probes do not belong on the penis; foley catheters do!).

    that there is no creature as strong as a demented little old lady.

    that willingness to make dad a dnr is inversely proportional to the quality of relationship they had with dad.

    that managers lie when they're trying to get you to come and work for them.

    that you probably don't really want your manager to come out of the office and give you a hand, no matter how busy you are. (you're an icu manager, you used to be an icu nurse. so how come you can't recognize vt on the little screen above the patient's bed? now is not the time for a complete neuro exam to figure out why he's not responding to you!)

    some of your coworkers are lazy, some lie, and some are lazy liars.

    that you should be wary of eating anything the family made at home and brought in for the nurses.]

    that you will get along with some of the patients no one else can stand, and that sometimes you can't stand everybody's favorite patients. ditto with families.

    that when the patient's family member is having hysterics and the patient's physician orders valium 10 mg. im for the family member, you really ought to consider sending/taking the family member to er rather than carrying out the order. even if your nurse manager insists that if you won't give it, she will, and you'd better be waiting for her in her office when she's done. (nurse manager couldn't recognize respiratory arrest, either. patient's physician intubated family member on the floor of patient's room, and nurse manager assisted with transfer to the er. subsequent conversation in nurse manager's office did not go precisely as nurse manager initially intended it to, and much better than rn expected it to!)

    that if you don't want to explain to journalists on tv why you did what you did, you probably ought not to do it.

    that if you have no sense of humor, you have no business in nursing and probably won't last long anyway!

    ruby


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