The Redneck Farmer

  1. A Redneck Farmer got in his pickup, drove to a neighboring farm, and knocked at the farmhouse door. A young boy about 12 opened the door.

    "Is yer paw home?" the farmer asked.

    "No sir, he ain't," the boy replied. "He went into town."

    "Well, said the farmer, is yer maw here?"

    "No, sir, she ain't here neither. She went into town with paw."

    "How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"

    "He went with maw and paw."

    The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other and mumbling to himself.

    "Is there anything I can do fer ya?" the boy asked politely. "I know where all the tools are, if you want to borry one, or maybe I could take a message fer paw."

    "Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to yer paw. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Pearly Mae, pregnant."

    The boy considered for a moment. "You would have to talk to Pa 'bout that", he finally conceded. "If it helps you any, I know that Pa charges $50 for the bull and $25 for the hog, but I really don't know how much he gets fer Howard.
    Last edit by FranEMTnurse on Jan 14, '05
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  2. 14 Comments

  3. by   Thunderwolf
    Good one!
  4. by   CHATSDALE
    Wild,,,lol
  5. by   Chad_KY_SRNA
    As a Kentuckian I must take offence at this reference to our sexual immorality, on the lighter side of things however that was funny as heck.
  6. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from Chad_KY_SRNA
    As a Kentuckian I must take offence at this reference to our sexual immorality, on the lighter side of things however that was funny as heck.
    Sorry about the offense. I changed the title so it wouldn't be referred to the state, but I missed the second one. It has now been edited out too.
    Last edit by FranEMTnurse on Jan 14, '05
  7. by   JVanRN
    Yeah I'm offended too...I have no idea why...but I'm totally offended.
  8. by   Nurseboy1
    Fran strikes the forum once again . Yet another good one.
  9. by   Chad_KY_SRNA
    It's weird but like five new threads are things that we have been discussing in my psych class. I wasn't horribly offended but honestly most of the people here in Eastern Kentucky are wonderful caring people who will give you the shirt off of their backs. I wish you could see "my Kentucky". Local college students, healthcare workers, friends, and neighbors, 99% of the people I know are honest caring people. We have all of the modern conveniences with a small town atmosphere. Y'all have a great day Greetings From Kentucky! Stop By Sometime.
  10. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from Chad_KY_SRNA
    It's weird but like five new threads are things that we have been discussing in my psych class. I wasn't horribly offended but honestly most of the people here in Eastern Kentucky are wonderful caring people who will give you the shirt off of their backs. I wish you could see "my Kentucky". Local college students, healthcare workers, friends, and neighbors, 99% of the people I know are honest caring people. We have all of the modern conveniences with a small town atmosphere. Y'all have a great day Greetings From Kentucky! Stop By Sometime.
    Chad, There's no need for you to stick up for your state. There are a lot of states that get tabbed with that stereotype. To name a few: Virginia, Tennessee, West Virginia, North Carolina, and even New York. So you're not alone. And as far as Kentucky is concerned, I have always wanted to tour Kentucky, Montana, Utah, Colorado, and Arizona. I don't think I ever will in this life, but it is a nice dream of mine. I too have been referred to as a hillbilly, redneck, if you will, but I just let it bounce off. I know what type of a person I am, and I doubt people will ever stop stereotyping.
  11. by   CHATSDALE
    'rednecks' are the salt of the earth....the finest people i have ever been honored to know..there is a special place in heaven for them
    i grew up in Arkansas, there was always room at their table for a guest...there was always a sense of humor to laugh at non funny droughts, cows that decided that a cold stormy night was the perfect time to bring a calf into the world
    they sacrificed to educate their children to have a better life than could be eked out with 40 acres and a mule
    they joined the army and fought for a country which needed them so very much
    they saw the world and then returned to the hills and deltas that gave them birth
    GOD LOVE THEM and fran they would never take offense when none was meant
    you keep the jokes coming...we need them now as never before
    thank you
  12. by   Chad_KY_SRNA
    Thank you Chatsdale, thats what I tried to say and failed to do. I too love Fran's jokes.
  13. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from CHATSDALE
    'rednecks' are the salt of the earth....the finest people i have ever been honored to know..there is a special place in heaven for them
    i grew up in Arkansas, there was always room at their table for a guest...there was always a sense of humor to laugh at non funny droughts, cows that decided that a cold stormy night was the perfect time to bring a calf into the world
    they sacrificed to educate their children to have a better life than could be eked out with 40 acres and a mule
    they joined the army and fought for a country which needed them so very much
    they saw the world and then returned to the hills and deltas that gave them birth
    GOD LOVE THEM and fran they would never take offense when none was meant
    you keep the jokes coming...we need them now as never before
    thank you
    Thanks, Dale and Chad for your support. I appreciate it.
  14. by   Chad_KY_SRNA
    I love the "weiner dog"

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