new medications for females

  1. > >
    > >
    > >D a m i t o l
    > >
    > >Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 hours.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >S t. M o m 's W o r t
    > >
    > >Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers
    > >unconscious for up to six hours.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >E m p t y N e s t r o g e n
    > >
    > >Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the
    > >memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till
    > >they moved out.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >P e p t o b i m b o
    > >
    > >Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an
    evening
    > >out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >D u m e r o l
    > >
    > >When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing
    > >enjoyment
    > >of country western music.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >F l i p i t o r
    > >
    > >Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the
    > >urge
    > >to flip off other drivers.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >A n t i b o y o t i c s
    > >
    > >When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving
    > >grades,
    > >freeing up phone lines, and reducing money spent on make-up.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >M e n i c i l l i n
    > >
    > >Potent antiboyotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines
    as,
    > >"You make me want to be a better person ... can we get naked now?"
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >B u y a g r a
    > >
    > >Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and
    > >duration
    > >of spending spree.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >Extra Strength Buy-One-all
    > >
    > >When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so
    > >severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by
    > >Dr.
    > >Laura.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >J a c k A s s p i r i n
    > >
    > >Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday,
    > >anniversary or phone number.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >A n t i-t a l k s i d e n t
    > >
    > >A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to
    > >share
    > >their life stories with total strangers.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >S e x c e d r i n
    > >
    > >More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a
    > >headache," syndrome.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >R a g a m e t
    > >
    > >When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging
    on
    > >him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself
    •  
  2. 4 Comments

  3. by   renerian
    :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle

    renerian
  4. by   emily_mom
    I think I need some Flipitor....&%*#$ drivers!!!!!
  5. by   melissa24
    :chuckle

    This is the funniest thing I have seen in a long time...thanks for the laugh!
  6. by   LilgirlRN
    You're welcome

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