Men are like...

  1. Ok... sorry guys... this one was too funny & yes, I know someone is gonna get me back for this one!


    Men are like.....Laxatives. They irritate the crap out of you.

    Men are like.....Bananas. The older they get, the less firm they are.

    Men are like.....Vacations. They never seem to be long enough.

    Men are like.....Bank Machines. Once they withdraw they lose interest.

    Men are like.....Weather. Nothing can be done to change them.

    Men are like.....Blenders. You need one, but you're not quite sure why= .

    Men are like.....Cement. After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.

    Men are like.....Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

    Men are like.....Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep yo= u
    up all night long.

    Men are like.....Commercials. You can't believe a word they say.

    Men are like.....Department Stores. Their clothes are always half off.

    Men are like.....Government bonds. They take so long to mature.

    Men are like.....Horoscopes. They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

    Men are like.....Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

    Men are like.....Popcorn. They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

    Men are like.....Snowstorms. You never know when they're coming, how
    many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

    Men are like.....Lava Lamps. Fun to look at, but not very bright.

    Men are like.....Parking Spots. All the good ones are taken and the
    rest are handicapped




    :chuckle
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  2. 18 Comments

  3. by   debyan
    :roll::roll: deb
  4. by   klhs
    ever notice how there seem to be more government bonds and parking spaces than coffee???
  5. by   Just Angi
  6. by   zudy
    :chuckle I threw my blender out!
  7. by   ladyjane
    also like potato chips: you can't have just one.
  8. by   Ted
    I resemble those remarks!

    :chuckle :roll :chuckle

    Very funny!

    Ted
  9. by   eltrip
    :chuckle :roll :roll :roll
  10. by   sanakruz
    Very good.
  11. by   J-RN student
  12. by   Talino
    Awwwllll .... to appreciate your men, there are simple rules you women should know:

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
    2. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
    3. Don't make us guess.
    4. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
    5. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
    6. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.
    7. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
    8. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
    9. Shopping is not everybody's idea of a good time.
    10. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
    11. You have enough clothes.
    12. You have too many shoes.
    13. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
    14. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and your Dad probably is too.
    15. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
    16. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
    17. Share the bathroom.
    18. Share the closet.
    19. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
    20. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
    21. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
    22. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
    23. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
    24. It is neither your interest nor ours to take the quiz together.
    25. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    26. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
    27. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
    28. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
    29. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
    30. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done -not both.
    31. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
    32. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
    33. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at
    34. When we're turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the off-ramp, you saying, "This is our exit," is not strictly necessary.
    35. Because I'm a man I will share equally in the housework. You do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, and the dishes. I'll do the rest.
    :kiss
  13. by   RN2B4SUR
    Love your list Talino! In the end we all want each other more then we speak!
  14. by   OBNURSEHEATHER
    Originally posted by RN2B4SUR
    In the end we all want each other more then we speak!
    Isn't that the truth? None of this matters when you're naked.

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