It's hard to live with a nurse because... - page 7
1) When you forget to flush the toilet, you get a complete analysis with a plan on how to correct any noted problems. 2) Thanksgiving dinner comes in pre-cut small pieces because she doesn't want... Read More
Sep 16, '01I have been a nurse for 3 years so my family has learned alot of medical terms. Here is a good example of one of them. The other nite my husband and I were driving home and he was eating gobstoppers and he made a choking sound. I said honey don't be choking on those it will be awfully hard to do the heimlech manuever on you when you are driving 60mph down the interstate. That is ok he said you can just do an episiotomy. I started laughing so hard. I told him that he was anatomically incorrect to be doing that. He said well what is that emergency thing when they cut a hole in your throat. I said a tracheotomy, he said well I knew it had an otomy on the end of it.
Nov 2, '01my husband was having abdominal pain for several weeks, nothing specific, just dull ache, no appetite. I strongly advised him to go to DR. HE refused - doesn't like Dr.s or hospital. One Sunday the pain worsened, I wanted to take him to ER- thought appendicitis - again he refused. HE inisted on playing volley ball in his regular leaque, I went along knowing he would never be able to play. Well guess what, he played. Then came home, sat down at the table to eat supper, and declared his pain was so bad, he couldn't eat, and was ready to go to ER. I said "FINE, GO" I stayed home with the kids. About an hour later he came flying in the house, said he had acute appendicitis and was going to have surgery. I asked him what he was doing home, had he ever heard of a telephone. He said he had things to do first! When I went with him back to the hospital, the anesthesiologist stated this was the first emergency surgery he had been called to see that walked out of ER and he had to wait on him. So sometimes all this wait and see attitude we preach to our families can backfire on us. He had a ruptured appendix and was quite sick for awhile. luckily all turned out well. Stomach aches are not always about constipation.
Nov 3, '01OK, My husband is the little sympathy person, even though I'm the nurse. I was getting more and more short of breathe walking stairs and even walking down a short hallway at work. Then I had a coughing spell at home at 0400. For some reason I went into the bathroom and flipped the light on - I was entirely blue - lips, face, hands. I freaked and woke up my husband to take me to ER now (before I die).
He found a cough drop in the medicine cabinet, slapped it in my hand and told me to go back to bed! I was live-ed. Though - it did the trick. I did go to the doctor the next morning and indeed had pneumonia.
I do really grill the babysitters and Daycare for I&O and BM's.
I love the story about the kid puking at the buffet
Nov 15, '01My best one was the time my youngest was about 9 years old and hurt his shoulder at school.. When the teacher asked him what she should do he said, "Call my mom she is a nurse and she has an X-ray machine.." Course I don't know where he thought I kept it.. Also, when my oldest was 8 years old he decided to be Evil Knivel and construct a ramp and jump his bicycle. He went over the handlebars and suffered an epidural hematoma.. I was only inat the time but rushed him to ED and then on to major medical center for craniotomy.. When I went to see him post-op found the hair that had been shaved and promplty threw in down the incinerator so he couldn't die because there was no hair to put on his head.....
Oh we are a sick bunch aren't we.... But it's ok.. Also, don't know if any of you remember the ER movie with Michael Learned as an ED MD and the drunk that she ordered 100 MG of IVP Valium for who continued to trash on the stretcher.. Had to watch the whole movie so I could see who the consulting MD was for the flick....LOL
Nov 16, '01all so true!! My family has banned me from watching ER since I woke them up yelling at the TV while the idiot "doctor" killed a woman by giving her mag sulfate for a post partum hemmorrhage.
My kids believe I have no understanding of their ailments, my husband and brothers cover their veins, my mother believes the woman at the health food store over me every time and people I really don't know well volunteer intimate details of their bodily functions. In preschool, my oldest daughter passed out the milk while she told her classmates that it had calcium for strong bones and teeth. They all knew that mom leaving work for a sick kid ment all day in bed, no videos, no books, no radio, no telephone and clear liquids only. If they agreed to it, I knew they were sick. I have been heard to say--it's a live with it kind of thing--for those things that are annoying to the person but not worth whine time to me.
Nov 16, '01oh yes, and you should have seen the look on the doctor's face when he brought in the x-ray reading of my daughter's arm to tell me it was broken and I responded "oh, good!" I hadn't wanted to run off to the ER for nothing and look silly after my friend (also RN) and I had stared at her arm doing the is it or isn't it routine!
Nov 16, '01A friend of my 15 yr old injured herself at school. My child assisted her to the office and promptly called me for advice. When she got off the phone she instructed the office staff how to care for the injured friend. Noone would listen to her and the friend was quite uncomfortable. She finally yelled " none of your people know what you are doing, if you are not going to listen to me, you had better get her to a Dr. damn fast" and off she stomped............would make a mother [RN] proud
Nov 19, '01I RECEIVED AN "EMERGENCY" CALL AT WORK ONE EVENING--MY DAUGHTER CALLED LONG DISTANCE FROM COLLEGE, AND EVEN PAID FOR THE CALL HERSELF (MOST UNUSUAL). WELL, HER ROOM-MATE WAS SICK, AND ACCORDING TO MY DAUGHTER, HER TEMP WAS 103, SHE WAS DEHYDRATED, AND A BUG WAS GOING AROUND AT HER DORM. STUDENT HEALTH HAD BEEN CALLED, AND DUE TO THE BUG GOING AROUND, THEY WERE OVERLOADED WITH PATIENTS ALREADY. THE ROOMMATE WAS TOLD TO TAKE TYLENOL AND IBUPROFEN (ALTERNATING), AND TO DRINK FLUIDS, ETC. AND TO CALL IN THE MORNING. MY DAUGHTER HAD GONE TO THE STORE AND BOUGHT OJ AND GATERADE FOR HER--THE SICK ROOMMATE--ALREADY. THEN SHE INSTRUCTED THE ENTIRE HALL (HALF THE GIRLS HAD THE BUG, AND THE OTHER HALF WERE JUST WATCHING, AND GETTING INFO FOR WHEN THEY WOULD GET THE BUG, BUT THERE WAS A CROWD IN THE ROOM) "DON'T DO ANYTHING UNTIL I CALL MY MOM!! SHE WILL KNOW WHAT TO DO, AND SHE WILL KNOW IF STUDENT HEALTH IS RIGHT----SHE'S AN RNC NURSE---IN MED-SURG NO LESS!!!" I DOUBT IF THE OTHER GIRLS KNEW WHAT SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT, BUT NOBODY MOVED UNTIL THE PHONE CALL WAS COMPLETE.
MAKES A MOTHER SO PROUD!!! MY CHILD THINKS I ACTUALLY KNOW SOMETHING!!
I LATER FOUND OUT THE REASON FOR THE DISTRUST OF STUDENT HEALTH---EVERY FEMALE THAT CAME IN WITH ANY SYMPTOM FROM A COUGH TO A RASH TO A HURT FOOT WAS GRILLED ABOUT PROBABLY BEING PREGNANT.
A WEEK LATER, WHEN MY KID FINALLY CAUGHT WHATEVER WAS GOING AROUND, ALMOST THE ENTIRE HALL CAME TO TAKE CARE OF HER--SHE WAS THEIR FAVORITE NURSE BY NOW.
Nov 19, '01I know what everyone is talking about here when it comes to no sympathy to family.
My hubby is an IDDM.....as well as hypothyroidism, high blood pressure and high cholesterol.
He eats more sugar and fat than anyone I know...his excuse....I'm on medication ...... my body.....my life!
However if I drink more than 2 bourbons he goes off!!
Oh and he is a bit of a hypochondriac....you know the type... if he has more than 2 BM in 1 day he has diarrhoea.....if none he is constipated.....that kind of thing.
So consequently I tend to ignore his complaints of I feel nauseous,etc etc.
Backfired on me once though when he ended up in ER with ketoacidosis!!
But even then he was the worst patient....complained the docs didn't know what they were doing,wouldn'd adhere to sliding scale insulin and kept giving himself extra shots of insulin to bring his sugars down so he could get home quicker!
Nov 20, '01This absolutely kills me. We are so much alike.
My daughter got into an argument with one of her friends at school. She proudly informed them that her daddy was a nurse to which they responded "he must be a doctor and isn't telling you". Thank you, no. I am a nurse and proud of it. My kids know the rules around here. No blood, no bones, no LOC, no problem. They also make me shut up while watching Trauma or ER, "Dad, it's just a TV show".
The testicular exam story was tooooo funny. LMAO.
Nov 25, '01You know you're a nurse when...
- using a public restroom, you wash your hands for a full minute and turn off the faucets with your elbows...
- you can almost SEE the germs on doorknobs and telephones...
- you can watch the goriest movie and eat almost anything
- your favorite dream is the one where you leave a mess at the bedside and tell the Dr. to clean it up!
- everyone including complete strangers tells you about each and everyache and pain they have...
Nov 28, '01Being an L&D nurse, I am absolutely no help to any of my family when they are sick. They will call with aches or pains and I'll ask "Are you pregnant? Because if your not, I can't fix it?" They soon quit calling! As for the kids...well, no blood spurting, no bones sticking out, no flames at least four feet high? Don't wake me up!
Also, being a night nurse with a small child at home, and two others at school, I have to thank someone for Barney and Nickelodeon. For they raised a wonderful child! I would sleep on the couch and she would play and watch Barney and Face. When it was time for Gullah-Gullah Island, that meant it was time to wake up Mommy to get lunch! Don't know how we could have survived without them!
Once I worked in a small hospital as the Nurse Manager of L&D and was also staff. I worked M-F 7a-7p and was on call all of the rest of the time. Needless to say, I rarely saw home. One particulary bad week, my husband called to say our middle child, then 7, had been falling asleep at school and complaining of "not feeling good". After the BM conversation, I told him to take her temp, no temp...ok, well make sure she eats and goes to bed early, I'll see you when I get home tomorrow. I hadn't been home for two days at that point. When I did get home the next night, it was already dark in the house and the lighting wasn't bright and we had dark paneling, but I could see my child was severely dehydrated....her eyes were even flat! So.......off to the ER we went....OMG! We walked in the door under those bright flourescent lights.....the kid was orange as a pumpkin! She had a severe case of Hepatitis A! Poor thing was hospitalized for a week! Wouldn't let anyone do her draws or IV's but Mommy and she never cried once! I felt so bad about putting her off for so long I quit the job! But, as useless as I am sometimes, my kids tell me everything...sometimes more than I want to know. And their friends have told me before their own parents that they are pregnant!
But through it all we have survived and I wouldn't trade careers for anything!
Dec 1, '01Don't just love when your family treats you like you don't know your a** from a hole in the ground? My 10 year old was sick the other morning. He had vomited for about 2 hours and then went back to sleep. My husband tended to him since I had worked late the night before. After my son woke up, he kept on c/o of a belly ache. He just wasn't acting right though. I finally told my husband I was taking him to the ER. My hubby said fine (I'm the nurse here) and that I wouldn't feel better till the doc told me it was just the flu. Well, we got to ER and the kid's temp went up and his WBC was 13,000. I called my husband and told him he better get his butt to the hospital because our son was going in for an appendectomy. I just wanted to say so bad "I told you so." My son did fine, but now my hubby has a bad case of N/V/D and coughing. He is dehydrated, but refuses to let me take him in for some IV fluids. This has been going on for over 30 hours now!! Oh well, I guess when he finally depletes his K+ level and he is so weak he can't move, he will let me take him in!!