How to Keep a Healthy Level of Insanity

  1. Here are a few things that can help you keep your sense of humor "healthy" and assist with dealing with the insanity of everyday life at work and home. Some of the suggestions may work better if you work in an office, but many are very adaptable.

    At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

    Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

    Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

    Put your garbage can on your desk and labet it "in"

    Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffiene addictions, switch to espresso.

    In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."

    Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."

    Don't use any punctuation marks or capital letters.

    As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

    As people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

    Specify that your drive-through order is "to go"

    Sing along at the opera.

    Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

    Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.

    Five days in advance, tell your frinds you can't attend their party because your're not in the mood.

    When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking ot, yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!"

    Tell your children over dinner. "due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

    And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity....

    Send this list to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you or asked you not to send them stuff like this.
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  2. 2 Comments

  3. by   ?burntout
    :chuckle
  4. by   tattooednursie
    today at work I already tried the fries thing . . . .Tomorrow I will page myself over the intercom. I am serious.

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