Health Questionaire

  1. [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']health[font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style'] question & answer session
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]i've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
    a: your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. everything wears out eventually. speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. want to live longer? take a nap.

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]should i cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: you must grasp logistical efficiencies. what does a cow eat? hay and corn. and what are these? vegetables. so a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. need grain? eat chicken. beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). and a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products


    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]should i reduce my alcohol intake?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: no, not at all. wine is made from fruit.brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. beer is also made out of grain. bottoms up!

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]how can i calculate my body/fat ratio?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. if you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]what are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: can't think of a single one, sorry. my philosophy is: no pain...good !

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]aren't fried foods bad for you?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: you're not listening!!!... foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. in fact, they're permeated in it. how could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: definitely not! when you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. you should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]is chocolate bad for me?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: are you crazy? [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']hello[font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']cocoa beans! another vegetable!!! it's the best feel-good food around!

    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]is swimming good for your figure?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: if swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.


    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']q: [color=maroon][color=maroon]is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']a: hey! 'round' is a shape!


    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']well, i hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about[font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']food and diets.
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']and remember:
    [font=bookman old style][font='bookman old style']"life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways " martini in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "woo hoo, what a ride"
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  2. 2 Comments

  3. by   CHATSDALE
    yipee yipee

    i always knew that i was doing the right thing...thank you thank you for

    showing how right i have been...i will never diviate from the course again
  4. by   bethin
    I've been right all along. Thank God!!



    So, why am I still overweight? :uhoh21:

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