Has a pt given you a chuckle lately? - page 2

Just wondering what comments patients have said to you recently that made you laugh. You know that saying about kids say the darndest things? Sometimes it's not just the kids. I had an elderly... Read More

  1. by   susi_q
    Took care of a female pt going thru DTs last weekend - really degenerated during the shift, and ended up in wrist & posey restraints. Of course, she was not happy about that. We all had to leave the room giggling though when she pulled me aside and said (not too quietly) "if those boys (respiratory therapists) would let her go, she would dance for them in the back room and they wouldn't have to tell anyone." Needless to say ... they didn't let her go, but we didn't let them forget the offer either.
  2. by   dingofred
    I had a woman one time that was admitted for detox, (hooked on pain pills), that could come up
    with the best reasons for needing a pain pill. The one that made me bust a gut was when she called me
    in because she was having vaginal spasms!!
    Wanted to tell her to sit back and enjoy! :imbar
  3. by   MandyInMS
    hahaha...for real...that's a complaint ? -gigglin-
  4. by   spot
    Male patient to female friend RN, "I need a vase" (pt was referring to a urinal). Not realizing what he was asking for, she replied, "How big is your bouquet??"
  5. by   frannybee
    I'm loving this guys! Keep em coming. Laughter is the best antidote for a cr*ppy day at work
  6. by   MarcusKspn
    We had a lady at the nursing home where I pass meds at. One time she had a mild UTI and was started on an ATB for it. Now this lady is a little bit slow sometimes, but she knew her pills, and she knew she never had to take this big white pill before. She came up to the nurses station and asked my charge-nurse why she has to take this extra pill. My nurse pleasently explained to her that she had a mild UTI and needed to take this pill for to get rid of it. The lady slowly wheeled herself to the nurse, leaned forward and very quietly stated: "But, I havent been with anybody?". We all had to try our hardest not to laugh as the nurse slowly explained that that is not the only way you can get an UTI to our poor confused lady.
  7. by   JnJTyson
    While working as a CNA on the 3-11 shift at a SNF, I kept getting calls to the front desk from a woman asking for ham sandwiches for her friends. (Its about 10p) At first I just tried telling her the kitchen was closed. But she called back a few more times (I wasn't the only one answering the phone) So finally I went down there to see exactly what was going on.

    She was sitting on her bed just chatting away in a quiet voice. So I went up next to her and asked her who her friends were, how many were there and such (none there of course) finally I sat down in the chair next to her bed to try and talk to her a while. She looked at me with no emotion and said in the most monotone voice "You're sitting on my friend."

    I have never gotten out of a chair so quickly in my life!!! Thank goodness she came out of it after a few mins of talking to me only. But I had to squat down to talk to her. I actually would never sit in her chair again!!!
  8. by   Nancy Nurse 8
    Oh, man, don't ever read that last story after working a graveyard! I cried til I wept!:chuckle
  9. by   jnrsmommy
    Looking back, this is rather funny, but at the time it definitely was not. I was working as a CNA at a LTC facility, and I was assisting to clean up a patient. The other aide was telling me about this patient and how her husband used to be in this room with her, in the bed that she was lying in. She also mentioned that the chair right next to me was his and he used to love sitting in it. As soon as she was done talking, the chair started to rise as if someone was getting out of it. The problem I had with that was that I could see the plug and it was not plugged in. Let me tell you, it took all I had to stay where I was and not run screaming down the hall!!
  10. by   emc-lpn
    The funniest guy where I work gets all the new staff with this one- calls them to his room , has a full urinal with a straw in it and asks if they can please get him some ice. When he finds out there is going to be a new person he saves his tea from lunch or dinner and gets them everytime. Once they find out he is indep. with all care and gets up to the BR, and that is his gag urinal, they get in the spirit of things too and beg to be the next person to take the uninitiated in.
  11. by   Nancy Nurse 8
    One place where I worked OB had the nurses warning me about "Initiation". They said you've been initiated to OB when you walked into a patient's BR and discovered her husband urination there.
    I got the Royale Initiation. "Here, let me dump your pitcher & get you fresh ice water!" I bubbled.
    He was in there, all right, but his back wasn't to me. He was sitting down with his trousers around his ankles making horrible loud sounds. :imbar "Scuse me!", I shrilled, and BOOM! slammed the door, beating a hasty retreat.
  12. by   Nancy Nurse 8
    (Oops! I mean here husband was urination in there...)
  13. by   Nancy Nurse 8
    GEEZE, I mean URINATING in there! Fumble-fingers McGee!

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