Funny things you have said but wish you didn't - page 21

A few years ago, I was on the phone with a person from the local lumber company. having in mind to ask if they had any tar paper. But instead, toilet paper slipped out. That remark started the... Read More

  1. by   danissa
    This comes from one of my colleagues, who is so funny and tries to talk sooo politely all the time...... we had twins, Mother Scottish, Father Spanish, and my friend asks them, Oh, so politely..."Will you be bringing them up Bisexual???" :roll Of course, she meant BI-LINGUAL!!!!!!
  2. by   angell883RN
    [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]
    It was last Xmas- I wanted to purchase a "gas card" as a stocking stuffer for my son, well my husband and I were riding down the road when i screamed, with delight, "Oh look honey, we better stop at that Mobil, gas is only $2.99, I can get my gas card there! " Well I wasn't thinking, of course! I was thinking I'd get it cheaper there and my son would have that "$2.99" price locked in until he used it! Duhhhhhhhhhhhhh- it wouldn't matter what the price! a $50 gas card is $50 period!they will NEVER let me forget that one!:icon_roll
  3. by   jakay RN
    woops!!
  4. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from danissa
    This comes from one of my colleagues, who is so funny and tries to talk sooo politely all the time...... we had twins, Mother Scottish, Father Spanish, and my friend asks them, Oh, so politely..."Will you be bringing them up Bisexual???" :roll Of course, she meant BI-LINGUAL!!!!!!
    :lol::clphnds:Wjat was her answer??
  5. by   MommieAmanda
    A few months ago I was taking care of a young man in his mid 20's who had attempte suicide by taking just about everything in his medicine cabinet.
    A couple hours after he was extubated I had to give him some meds. As I usually do when I give pills to someone for the first time, I asked if he had any trouble taking pills. His reply? "That's kind of why I'm here." Insert foot in mouth.
  6. by   danissa
    Quote from Franemtnurse
    :lol::clphnds:Wjat was her answer??
    Fran , the answer was for all around to burst into tears of laughter! Honestly, this woman is unconsciously one of the funniest people on the planet!
  7. by   LiverpoolJane
    It was a Friday afternoon in 1989 and we had just completed our 8 week induction as student nurses and we were all visiting the wards we were starting on Monday.
    As I walked down the old Nightingale ward I heard someone shout my name - I turned around to see a lady I knew from being local to my mums - Mrs K. She tells me "I'm on my way out ... I've got bowel cancer.... they haven't said that but my brother had the same thing so I know....." So went the conversation.
    Then the time came for us all to leave and without thinking I said "goodbye - I'll see you Monday - if you're still here!!!" Cringe - what do you say after that? I scuttled off and was dreading Monday morning as I didn't know how to face her - I needn't have worried as when I went I was told she had died on Saturday.

    A case of "here's your hat, what's your hurry"
  8. by   danissa
    Oh Jane, I know it's sad that the woman died, BUT...OMG! How on earth did you get your foot out of your mouth after saying that?? Babe, you made me laugh out loud here!


    "Here's your Hat, whats your Hurry?"...FAB, Haven't heard that expression for years, since my Granny died I think! She had wonderful sayings like that all the time!
  9. by   LiverpoolJane
    When I said "...if you're still here" I actually meant if she hadn't been discharged, as I honestly didn't think she looked any different to when I used to see here every night at the bus stop. I couldn't think of a way of expalining myself so ... I just give it toes - as quick as I could.

    It's one of those situations - and I've got hundreds of them - that will always make me cringe. I have a terrible habit of hearing something really stupid being said and when I turn to find out who said it - it's me!!

    Yes my nan also had a way with words and I wish I could recall them all.



    Quote from danissa
    Oh Jane, I know it's sad that the woman died, BUT...OMG! How on earth did you get your foot out of your mouth after saying that?? Babe, you made me laugh out loud here!


    "Here's your Hat, whats your Hurry?"...FAB, Haven't heard that expression for years, since my Granny died I think! She had wonderful sayings like that all the time!
  10. by   xviii-xxv
    i was doing a PA on a female pt one time.so i was trying to test her sensation (touch) i had her close her eyes and got a cotton ball.i was up all night and was nearly losing it (worked double shift) i lightly run the cotton ball onto her foot (dorsal) then i suddenly blurted out, "are u dumb?" ( what i was really trying to say was do u feel anything and at the same time i was thinking of the word numb *reduced or no sensation**got everything mixed up*)..my entire face went red and i profusely apologized to the pt..luckily she just laughed probably thinking "poor nurse"... :imbar:imbar:imbar
  11. by   jakay RN
    That happened to me too.:chuckle
  12. by   FranEMTnurse
    Poor duh umb patients
    Last edit by ElvishDNP on Feb 21, '08 : Reason: deleting out image file that didn't show up
  13. by   sarah_bellum
    I didn't say this but, I probably would have.

    A pt called the nurse in his room to report he thought he was going to have DTs.

    The next words out of her mouth (without thinking) were "What do you take for this at home?"

    The patient stared at her and said "Uh, alcohol?"

    :beercuphe





    When she recounted this at the nurses station I about died laughing! Ask a stupid question....:smackingf

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