Funny things that pts say - page 6

Sometimes sweet innocence can make your whole day...... I once had a pt who had really bad gas as I was helping her into the tub and she stated to me "no need to turn on the jets today honey,... Read More

  1. by   KarynicaRN
    When I began my job as the DON at my employment, I had a resident at a LTC walk up to me and say "so you are our new DOA!"

    I wanted to laugh so hard, but waited until I was out of her sight. What a sweet lady she was. :roll
  2. by   nursebabygirl 08
    Quote from Nurse Salt
    I was working in a 6 bed ward one night two men were VERY confused and restrained for their safety. Well, all night they they were "talking" to each other but not having the same conversation! One was talking about his home being burglarized and the other was laying cement somewhere... But they were going back and forth responding to each other as if they were old friends! Anyway, as this went on at one point one of them mentioned being tied down and the other one goes, "I'm tied down too... When you get out come over here and untie me!" Then they went straight back into their "conversation." The other nurse and I were trying so hard not to laugh but when that happened we couldn't help it! :chuckle

    Girl i feel you !!
  3. by   alcrab01
    When I worked in the PICU, I once took care of an infant with severe hydrocephalus who kept having seizures. The mom and dad (both 17 and first cousins... yeah, I'm from Kentucky), kept astonishing me with their questions.

    One day, Daddy said, "Hey let me ask you something. If that seizure's in her brain, why's it makin' her arm twitch?"

    I started to explain, "Well, you know how your brain controls everything else in your body..." I got a blank stare. Then I said, "Um.. Let me go get the resident! He will be able to explain it much better!"

    Another time, a baby with asthma was admitted in the middle of the night. The mom stuck her head out the door and said, "Hey, excuse me! Do you got a toy or somethin'? He's gettin' tired of playin' with my cigarettes." Go figure, wonder why that kid has asthma?
  4. by   nursebabygirl 08
    Quote from alcrab01
    When I worked in the PICU, I once took care of an infant with severe hydrocephalus who kept having seizures. The mom and dad (both 17 and first cousins... yeah, I'm from Kentucky), kept astonishing me with their questions.

    One day, Daddy said, "Hey let me ask you something. If that seizure's in her brain, why's it makin' her arm twitch?"

    I started to explain, "Well, you know how your brain controls everything else in your body..." I got a blank stare. Then I said, "Um.. Let me go get the resident! He will be able to explain it much better!"

    Another time, a baby with asthma was admitted in the middle of the night. The mom stuck her head out the door and said, "Hey, excuse me! Do you got a toy or somethin'? He's gettin' tired of playin' with my cigarettes." Go figure, wonder why that kid has asthma?


    oh boy!!!
  5. by   Laughs-a-lot, RN
    Awesome!!
  6. by   puppylover
    I work in TBI and SCI, so needless to say I have my share of confused patients. Add nightshift to the mix and things really heat up!
    I asked a lady who sent her the flowers, and she said, "My husband and his wife".
    I had a guy who thought his closet was a fridge full of pizza coupons, and we had to hurry before they ran out of pizza.
    How about the guy that thought his urinal was full of coffee? You can imagine how that played out!
    We had one that thought they were part of the staff, and would try to access the med room to pass meds. He would wander and try to give peas to patients....I guess he thought they were meds! What topped it off was we had a CNA that had been peed on that day, so she had changed into a gown and drawstring pants. The other patients were moreso confused when two "patients" would enter their rooms and try to work! hahaha!
  7. by   Jelet
    Quote from Nurse Salt
    I was working in a 6 bed ward one night two men were VERY confused and restrained for their safety. Well, all night they they were "talking" to each other but not having the same conversation! One was talking about his home being burglarized and the other was laying cement somewhere... But they were going back and forth responding to each other as if they were old friends! Anyway, as this went on at one point one of them mentioned being tied down and the other one goes, "I'm tied down too... When you get out come over here and untie me!" Then they went straight back into their "conversation." The other nurse and I were trying so hard not to laugh but when that happened we couldn't help it! :chuckle
    lolololol
  8. by   alcrab01
    I love alcohol withdrawal patients. They never fail to keep me laughing. One night, I had an old man who was a pill! I ended up having to put him in 4-point restraints. Despite my efforts, he still tried to escape. Sitting at the nurse's station, I could see him doing sit-ups, trying to get the restraints loose. I yelled, "Hey, I can see you!" He said, "I see you too! Quit being so nosy!"

    Later on, I almost peed in my pants.. He had been quiet for awhile and I was hoping that he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden I heard him call out, "Can anyone hear me?!?! Help! I'm tied up! Follow the sound of my voice!" Hahaha that still cracks me up!
  9. by   sbenning5
    Quote from alcrab01
    I love alcohol withdrawal patients. They never fail to keep me laughing. One night, I had an old man who was a pill! I ended up having to put him in 4-point restraints. Despite my efforts, he still tried to escape. Sitting at the nurse's station, I could see him doing sit-ups, trying to get the restraints loose. I yelled, "Hey, I can see you!" He said, "I see you too! Quit being so nosy!"

    Later on, I almost peed in my pants.. He had been quiet for awhile and I was hoping that he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden I heard him call out, "Can anyone hear me?!?! Help! I'm tied up! Follow the sound of my voice!" Hahaha that still cracks me up!



    That's hilarious!!
  10. by   NY-RN_Kay
    Quote from alcrab01
    I love alcohol withdrawal patients. They never fail to keep me laughing. One night, I had an old man who was a pill! I ended up having to put him in 4-point restraints. Despite my efforts, he still tried to escape. Sitting at the nurse's station, I could see him doing sit-ups, trying to get the restraints loose. I yelled, "Hey, I can see you!" He said, "I see you too! Quit being so nosy!"

    Later on, I almost peed in my pants.. He had been quiet for awhile and I was hoping that he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden I heard him call out, "Can anyone hear me?!?! Help! I'm tied up! Follow the sound of my voice!" Hahaha that still cracks me up!

    LMAO!! Oh my that is tooo funny!
  11. by   psalm
    I had a pt. in a semi-private room who needed frequent neuro checks. So I tried to speak softly so the roommate wouldn't be disturbed. I asked my pt. can you tell me your name? And he slowly stated "My name is...Earl" All of a sudden I hear a hearty laugh from the roommate. And yes, it was my pts' name. Cute.
  12. by   nursebabygirl 08
    Quote from NY-SN_Kay
    LMAO!! Oh my that is tooo funny!


    i would have had to go around the corner to laugh
  13. by   JaredCNA
    Last night I moved a very combative (and very confused) pt up in bed. He apparently thought we jerked him up in bed really hard, and he got in my face and told me that next time he would shake a salt shaker in my face if I wasn't more gentle.

    :uhoh21: :chuckle

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