Funny doctor orders

[laurenicoleRN]

I worked at a teaching hospital for about a year. I really enjoyed closely interacting with the interns, residents and staff physicians. Many times hilarious orders were written by the newbies. One of my personal favorites was from an intern who only wrote "Vicodin" and that was it. No route, dosage, frequency, etc. Haha! We also had a doctor write "b4" in the chart. We assumed they meant "before." I guess they forgot that this wasn't text messaging. Lol! We also had an older doctor who would write things like, "please call help desk to get the printer fixed." Yes, in the chart. Good times. Please share any of your funny stories from charts!

[FranEMTnurse, CNA, LPN, EMT-I]

Had an order that said "4 mg. prn" the Dr. signed. Had another one nobody could read. I chased him into the parking lot with the chart and asked him what it said. He said, "How would I know? I can't read it." Have had quite a few that say "change wound drsg. daily" but the pt. has 6 wounds and they never say which one. The worst was one that said DNR. So we put a band on the patient and made her a no code. Three days later he came back from vacation and asked how the pt. was doing with the drug neb Rxs he ordered. That's what his "DNR" meant. Great.

:rolleyes:GO FIGURE!

[FranEMTnurse, CNA, LPN, EMT-I]

Had a kid that consistently failed room air trials and could not get weaned from 02. Doctor wrote "Give next dose of prednisone to oximetry machine, as child is pink and without s/s of distress."

:lol2::lol2:

[FranEMTnurse, CNA, LPN, EMT-I]

We really do keep doctors from killing patients

Is that ever the truth!

[msjellybean]

I love reading this stuff. I work in PICU and we have a doctor who will write "check snot for RSV.". Or "get pts butt out of bed" instead of writing ambulate hallways or swab for RSV! Lol. I've also looked at his progress notes and right After we went from paper to computer charting I read a note he had written that stated, "pt not drinking but unable to read the organized ******** in the graphics. ". Haha. Not as good as some that vie read on here

But had to share. :)

This kind of reminds of me a note one of our docs wrote one time. He's notorious for putting random, non-sensical things into his progress notes. I don't remember why the lady was in the hospital, but in the middle of his note, we have this gem, "the pt is laying next to an uneaten chocolate chip cookie. I think this is good."

As for the funniest order I've ever seen, insert NG PRN for hiccups.

[emnicams]

We have a doc that often signs his progress notes "Dr. SoandSo, Bamf." Type "BAMF" in on urbandictionary.com if you don't know what it stands for... and yes, it's well known that THAT is what he means. He's an egotistical guy for sure.

[vanburbian]

Wayyy back, when I worked ortho, we had one doc (my favorite) who used to write the following on the pre printed discharge orders for all of his total knee patients:

SEXUAL ACTIVITY- Not on your knees....

I miss you Dr.C.

[WoosahRN, MSN, RN]

Wayyy back, when I worked ortho, we had one doc (my favorite) who used to write the following on the pre printed discharge orders for all of his total knee patients:

SEXUAL ACTIVITY- Not on your knees....

I miss you Dr.C.

:lol2::lol2::lol2::lol2:

Hahaha! I love it! I love a doc with a good sense of humor!

I can just imagine the discharge teaching!

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

Wayyy back, when I worked ortho, we had one doc (my favorite) who used to write the following on the pre printed discharge orders for all of his total knee patients:

SEXUAL ACTIVITY- Not on your knees....

I miss you Dr.C.

:hhmth: Too funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[canesdukegirl, BSN, RN]

I don't have any funny ones.

I do remember a Dr who was very upset with a nurse who did not give a med the Dr did NOT write an order for. He put it in his progress note but forgot to write an order. He let every nurse at the nurses station know that no matter where he wrote an order we had to find it and follow it. He said if he wrote it on the wall in the men's bathroom that we had to find it and follow it. So that day he carried a roll of toilet paper and wrote all his orders on toilet paper and placed them in the front of the chart. The nurse manager brought the Chief in to take a look, the Chief re-wrote all the orders while steam poured from his ears. What I would have given to be a fly on the wall and heard the discussion between the Chief and that Dr. That Dr. never repeated that behavior.

Can we use this same logic when we are forced to document the SAME thing on 5 different parts of the chart?

[dugb_rn]

I know this is a very late reply, but someone had asked, "As an aside, does anyone else know what a smog enema is? No hospital I've been at since has ever heard of one."

This is what a SMOG enema is at my hospital:

25% Mineral oil

25% Milk of magnesia

25% Glycerin

25% Sorbitol

[YankeeHater]

Just last night I saw a doc write an actual order for "warm blankets prn" I was like, nooooo..we'll just let the poor lady freeze when she's cold in bed! haha..

[Penelope_Pitstop, BSN, RN]

Just last night I saw a doc write an actual order for "warm blankets prn" I was like, nooooo..we'll just let the poor lady freeze when she's cold in bed! haha..

You want another blanket, sir? Sorry, you don't have an order for it. Allow me to page the physician...