Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 54

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   SuesquatchRN
    Administer via fallopian tube.
  2. by   bambam1288
    this is so funny .. LOL
  3. by   tri-rn
    "SCDs until ambulating well" on a bilat BKA pt.
  4. by   sweetieprn
    I work on a respiratory unit, had an order for a Psych Consult...on an unresponsive trach/vent patient. Funny thing was the nurse on the previous shift had noted the order pending family approval. The daughter wanted to know why her mother who had been unresponsive and on the vent for 15yrs warranted a psych consult. We all had a good laugh imagining exactly how that consult would play out! Unbelievable some of the things you see on a daily basis!
  5. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from sweetieprn
    I work on a respiratory unit, had an order for a Psych Consult...on an unresponsive trach/vent patient. Funny thing was the nurse on the previous shift had noted the order pending family approval. The daughter wanted to know why her mother who had been unresponsive and on the vent for 15yrs warranted a psych consult. We all had a good laugh imagining exactly how that consult would play out! Unbelievable some of the things you see on a daily basis!
    Go figure!!!
  6. by   tish8532
    I had a situation similar to Nurse-Lou...

    we had a frequent patient, who the cardiologist would write the ETOH orders... he was a COPD'r, bilateral BKA's, 2-3 ppd smoker... PVD, with a wife who harped on him... the Dr used to say that it was easier to give the man a belt Q6 hrs, than to go thru the DT's...

    But it wasn't a specific liquor... we never knew what was going to come up from pharmacy to the narc PYXIS... in the amber (cough syrup) bottle. whiskey, vodka... and even the patient used to chuckle at his "waitresses" bringing whatever the "bartender" wanted to serve
  7. by   OutlawNurse86
    "Change battery in clock in patient room"

    "Scotch, 1/2 oz, q6h prn"

    The best order I have ever see a Doc write (not really funny, but I was EXTREMELY thankful that he wrote it):
    "21mg Nicotine patch, and Ativan 0.5 to 2mg, po or IV, q2-3h prn, also resume home Xanax"
  8. by   gladtobeOB
    Kleenex at the bedside prn
  9. by   RN77
    About 30 years ago, when computer orders were just beginning to become popular, the older docs couldn't understand why they had to use the new system, and why they couldn't just write orders in the chart, "Like always." Well, they could, and the US would enter them, but the administration was really trying to get all the docs to put their orders directly into the computer, in order to improve efficiency and get care to the patients in a more timely manner. One doc, in particular, had great difficulty getting his orders into the computer and was quite frustrated with the whole process. On one patient's chart, after a long struggle with trying to get the order in, he typed, "Go to hell, computer." Of course, THAT one went in without any problems and is now, permanently, a part of that patient's record.
  10. by   HollyHobby
    "Puree bacon and put down NG tube."
    From a cardiologist!

    We have a nurse on our unit who collects funny orders, errors in dictation, or anything else that gets messed up when written and/or put into the computer by the unit clerk. Whenever we come across something hilarious, we put a copy in her mailbox. A few good ones:

    "CT of Elvis, STAT". Instead of "CT of pelvis". (Sorry, but Elvis has left the building.)

    We had one doc who always dictated a very thorough H&P, including details about the patient's sexual history, pets in the home, etc. I came across this one, which implied something the doc surely didn't mean:
    "Pt has had 12 sexual partners, one dog."

    My personal favorite: "Propofol drip, titrate for seduction." (Instead of sedation.)
  11. by   ivorybunny
    NPO until fully awake...

    Apply 1" of nitropaste to chest wall Q6, have a 8 hour nitrate free period at night
  12. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from sweetieprn
    i work on a respiratory unit, had an order for a psych consult...on an unresponsive trach/vent patient. funny thing was the nurse on the previous shift had noted the order pending family approval. the daughter wanted to know why her mother who had been unresponsive and on the vent for 15yrs warranted a psych consult. we all had a good laugh imagining exactly how that consult would play out! unbelievable some of the things you see on a daily basis!
    usually what that means is that the attending needs help with the psych meds. could this med that we've been putting down her ng tube every day because she takes it at home be causing some of these symptoms? could it be interfering with this other drug? if it is, can we just stop it or do we have to taper it? what will happen if we don't taper it?

    and then there are the patients (two of them in the past five years) with conversion reactions. one was faking unresponsiveness and the other was faking seizures. pysch consult helped us figure that one out.

    here's one you probably haven't seen in a chart: "witch doctor consult."

    it worked, too!
  13. by   ShirleyBRN
    Quote from NurseTrish38
    I have heard of the sugar tx for pressure ulcers from wound care nurses nowadays but they don't use it anymore.

    But the back rub thing I think went out when we all started having 10 to 12 patients, ( 8 most nights on my floor),and some patients with the multiple psych problems + medical problems most nurses get on med surg or cardiac floors like where I work if we tried therapuetic touch they would become abusive or think we were commiting battery on them... I am serious...
    sad but true I wish it were different because human touch is important.
    Another good decub remedy you don't see anymore....... Mix Maalox with Iodine and leave open to air (preferably a fan blowing directly on their butt). Just remember to turn pt so that they are facing the door :redpinkhe

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