Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 2

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   KRVRN
    Imagine being a nursing student helping to pass out lunch trays and coming across one with 2 cans of beer on it. Made sense once the charge nurse told me why it was there, but really surprised me! I also remember a comatose man in the ICU that was getting whiskey through his NG tube.
  2. by   RN-NICU
    One of my favorites...... 3H enema.... High, hot, and hell of alot.
    For the chronically constipated pt, I guess.
  3. by   johnboy
    Here's a rather annoying order written by a first-year resident, on the floor of all places:

    Nitropaste 1.5 inches to chest wall, q6h (fair enough so far),

    "TITRATE" to SBP> 90 by wiping off 1/4 inch at a time.

    How many of you folks have the time to stand by the bedside and take serial BP's when you have 10-14 patients all calling for you, just so you can "titrate" Nitropaste?
  4. by   Furball
    about the dumbest order I ever got was one asking for a u/a on an anuric pt! uh-DUH!!!


    Geesh......
  5. by   canna42
    This wasn't an order a Dr wrote but was a diagnosis on an ER chart. Female patient came in with an ulcer on her leg...badly infected. On the er record our doc wrote for diagnosis...copious ***** drainage..ha ha ha totally left off where ...laughed until we cried. Next time he worked of course we brought it to his attention. The look on his face was priceless. Afterall you cannot alter a permanent record. Also had an elderly doc running through nurses station give a verbal order of " Swab so and so's mouth q 4 hrs with glycerin suppository " . At the time both day and night shift there for report and one of our surgeons..had a good laugh at the poor dears expense..course this is same doc that asked us one morning if the patient from the funeral home came yet .ha ha ha
  6. by   OneChattyNurse
    I had a patient in the LTC facility that received 30cc whiskey PRN. He had drank 5 fifths a week for the past 50 years. His Physician said if she cut him off now he would die! It was kinda funny, he would come up to the nurses station like it was the bar and ask for his "shot".

    Shari
  7. by   joforth
    Originally posted by Yeti1313LPN
    From tonights shift

    --Psychic consult
    --phisic consult

    --Barbara
    that is a good one!!
  8. by   Furball
    In the same vein chatty.

    Once while being a brand new RN doing homecare I called a physician to report worsening sob in an end stage COPD-er. Her sat was 78% and her lips blue tinged. She adamently refused to go to the ER.

    He asked if there were any beers in the fridge. While looking, I tried my darndest to figure out the reason for the odd request. When I got back to the phone I said "yes, there's some Coors light in the fridge". He said "What are you waiting for? Give her 1 or 2, whatever, and then call me." Magically, after 3/4 of a beer she slowed her rate down and could concentrate on pursed lip breathing which she couldn't do before because of anxiety. Her lips pinked and her sat climbed back to her usual 89%. My only reaction at the time was....wow, the things they DON"T teach you in nursing college.
  9. by   JWaldron
    One doctor kept writing the same order every day, because we never carried it out - U/A and C7S for a dialysis patient, and he complained to the N/M that we were refusing to implement his orders! the other funny order was as follows:
    Foley catheter
    Low continuous suction

    on a 26 y.o. male patient! Poor guy!
  10. by   CashewLPN
    --MVI with vitamins.

    --Barbara
  11. by   nu one
    The weirdest I encountered was coffee enema Q1... and it had to be brewed, not instant coffee.... and we did it!!!

    .....imagine having your butt having a coffee break...

  12. by   Ltkristarn
    Originally posted by mattcastens




    You laugh, but that's becoming more common (again). Our surgeons screen patients for possible DTs after their open-heart surgery. If they're found to be at risk, they have a standing order for "Beer: 1 can PO, BID." Thank god they specified "PO".

    They figure that it's easier (and better for the patient) to stem the DTs before they start. We're not going to dry them up anyway, and their bodies can put the energy into healing instead of withdrawl.
    We had the same thing. Patient post op day two for a R THR- major alcoholic. Talking a pint of vodka, plus a case of beer a day- lol. When did he drink water- I don't know? The doc, quote, unquote, "I don't have time to deal with this now, Give him Budweiser two cans po tid prn" It worked. No DTs- thank goodness.
  13. by   lpnandloveit1
    Oh wow I am old. re: three H enema gave a lot of them (for impactions) coffee emema yep given them too. 1--2-3 (glycerine,epsom salt water) and my all time favorite-----Milk and molasass.(yummy)

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