From the mouths of non-nurses - page 4

My wife, a piano teacher, and I were talking about music and she was using some pretty "technical" terms that I, not a music professional, didn't understand. She said, "Now you know what it's like... Read More

  1. by   fronkey bean
    Quote from nursegirl1988
    My sons often ask me when I come home from work "Did you get to do anything cool today, like put a tube is some guys , or stick him with needles?" I once answered "no, but I got to put a suppository in a patients rectum" and he replied "Mom you have the coolest job!" If he only thinks I am this cool when he is 16......
    That is so funny. My 10y/o daughter does the same thing.
  2. by   seasonedlpn
    I had a Home Health patient that had me confused for a while. She complained about her "henrids"...figured out she meant hemorrhoids. She also talked about getting a new "brow" in the store...she meant bra. I never will figure out how they come up with this stuff...like "limp noids"..and the ever popular "prostrate".
  3. by   peridotgirl
    Quote from fronkey bean
    I was working w/ a tech. one day and she kept looking at the heart monitor screen w/ a frown on her face. finally she asked, "What is big eminy?"
    I don't understand. what did she actually mean (in med terms)?
  4. by   prmenrs
    A cardiac arrythmia called bigeminy.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bigeminy
    Last edit by prmenrs on Nov 23, '07
  5. by   rannRN
    hi..just want to clear out something...what is a "big eminy?' what does this mean?
  6. by   Diary/Dairy
    Bigeminy (every other beat a PVC or something not sinus)
  7. by   fronkey bean
    Quote from peridotgirl
    I don't understand. what did she actually mean (in med terms)?
    she meant bigeminy, as in the heart rhythm:spin:
  8. by   NOTEWORTHY
    Just about all my male patients call a urinal "the jug;" and I call it making water.
    Urinate sounds crude and lay people don't know what void is.
    How do you ask your patients if they are having any difficulties voiding?
  9. by   tiggerforhim
    Quote from NOTEWORTHY
    Just about all my male patients call a urinal "the jug;" and I call it making water.
    Urinate sounds crude and lay people don't know what void is.
    How do you ask your patients if they are having any difficulties voiding?
    Depending on the education level:
    PhD - Are you having an impediment with elimination, fecal or urinary?
    Master's - Do you have any hindrance to your urination?
    Bachelor's - Do you have any problems with going to the bathroom?
    High school - Do ya have any problems p****ing?
    Grade school - Do ya have any problems peeing?
    Pre-school on down - Wee-wee?

    Now please take this in the best way possible. I am in no way making fun of a steriotype or anybody's education level or lack thereof, just in the light hearted spirit of the humor forum.
  10. by   treysdaddy08
    Quote from tiggerforhim
    Depending on the education level:
    PhD - Are you having an impediment with elimination, fecal or urinary?
    Master's - Do you have any hindrance to your urination?
    Bachelor's - Do you have any problems with going to the bathroom?
    High school - Do ya have any problems p****ing?
    Grade school - Do ya have any problems peeing?
    Pre-school on down - Wee-wee?

    Now please take this in the best way possible. I am in no way making fun of a steriotype or anybody's education level or lack thereof, just in the light hearted spirit of the humor forum.
    what do you ask them if they're from arkansas?
  11. by   bear49709
    SLIGHTLY MORBID,

    I was patroling south of bahgdad when we called to a NG MP squad that had a casualty from an RPG (Rocket Propelled Grenade.) When we arrive the SSG (Staff Seargent) was missing most of his left leg and his left arm was in shreads. We hit him with the morphine and turniquets then got to driving while a medic tried to save his limbs without killing him. We get a Medevac (helicopter) to meet us up the road. As we're loading him the flight doc, a very attractive female we had run into many times, was helping load him into the bird. The PT grabs her by the back of the head and gently pulls her close. She complies figuring hes got a last request or something. Then we hear him say, "I got this problem, It burns when I pee!" We all about died laughing at the clear vioence and self control it took him to try and make us smile in his condition.
  12. by   karenG
    some years ago when working at Moorfields Eye Hospital, I was taking a medical history from a little old lady.. she told me that she was aneuronic! this puzzled me so I asked her what she meant by this. She told me her GP had told that she was aneuronic because she used to have a neuron and a synapse but they had stopped working so she was now aneuronic!! and yes, I had to try very very hard not to laugh..

    she was lovely but her doc had obviously run out of patience with her!!

    Karen
  13. by   StacieRN
    Quote from kmcnelly
    what do you ask them if they're from arkansas?
    Hey! I resemble that remark!

close