What is a Yankee? The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?..... The position of the dirt bag.
Why is divorce so expensive?.....Because it's worth it.
What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth...One US Leader.
What do attorneys use for birth control...Their personalities.
How many women does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just sit there in the dark and b***h.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart? Through his chest with a sharp knife.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade. Who has the biggest boobs? The blonde, because she's 18.
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? Mace will do that to you.
Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia? Everyone has the same DNA.
Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays? Because on Tuesday and
Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
Where does an Irish family go on vacation? A different bar.
What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the
other? A speech impediment.
What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at
half-mast? They’re hiring.
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