Charting Bloopers - page 19
Found in the History and Physical section of a patient's chart who had experienced visual hallucinations while ill: "Patient vehemently denies any auditory, tactile, or old factory... Read More
Jan 31, '05We had two pts with almost exactly the same name (one letter off) .However one was male Leslie . And the other was female Michael.
Poor Leslie varied between BPH and vaginal irritation .
And michael was status post removal of penile implant one day and candidas the next .
Feb 3, '05Quote from Trauma-tizedRNshe must not have cared about the castration.oops another...
Cardiologist discussing the need for a "catheterization" with a very HOH older patient. Doc leaves...next thing I know, pt is on the phone with family telling them that he is going for a castration today! And talking so lound half the unit can hear! Wife wants to talk to nurse. Says she's glad to hear it wasn't his heart afterall. OMG
Aug 18, '05Reading notes from local doctor on a patient from nursing home, who had had a right mastectomy several years earlier..." patient alert x 4, appears well fed, right breast still missing." (like it would grow back like a lizard tail???)
This same doc a few years ago admited a patient to the floor with "pork chop enteritis"...hmmm...
Aug 18, '05Quote from vablueyes:chuckleReading notes from local doctor on a patient from nursing home, who had had a right mastectomy several years earlier..." patient alert x 4, appears well fed, right breast still missing." (like it would grow back like a lizard tail???)
I can see it now, "Found: right breast. Please call and identify..."
Aug 29, '05Quote from RNkatFrom the physician progress notes on a patient with a glass eye:
And then there was the ER doc who charted: "Both breasts equal and reactive to light and accommodation."
ya gotta laugh!
[PHP]Why is it that all of the instruments seeking intelligent life in the universe are pointed away from Earth? [/PHP]
Aug 29, '05Quote from CubbyWhile working at our local Psychiatric Hospital many years ago (when nursing was still fun) I had a patient who had lost his shoes a few days prior. Well this particular day he was acting odder than usual so we checked him for an impaction. It was charted like this 'Checked for impaction, shoe found' OH MY!!!
Ouch! Bet it was hard for the patient to get off on the right foot... Oh well, if the shoe fits...
[PHP][FONT=Comic Sans MS]Why is it that all of the instruments seeking intelligent life in the universe are pointed away from Earth?[/FONT][/PHP]
Aug 30, '05One of my kids was sort of going nuts post op, he was moving all over the place, seeing stuff ect..I called Dr. for possible restriant orders (to keep his f/c and iscision safe) but a thte time he was calm.
MDs order...."if he goes Ape Sh*t overnight call me"...
IS that a medical definition? Funny yhitng was in the night he was calm but he did have a MASSIVe BM overnight right in the middle of his bed..IS that waht the MD meant?
Aug 30, '05Pt telemetry alarm going off at desk repeatedly, pt sleeping w/o any distress noted, telemetry turned off at the desk.
This patient was found dead during the 0400 v/s. Needless to say, this stupid nurse lost her liscense and the hospital is involved in a lawsuit.
Aug 30, '05Quote from daisybabyOUCH !Postop pt came to our floor with MD order: "Foley to low wall suction".
Sep 6, '05Pt with a penile infection:
"Nurse to clean schmegma off pt's penis"
Never mind that the pt was A&Ox3, and had 2 good hands.
Oct 18, '05Seen in my pts chart this evening: Please Toilet Mouth. Thank you.
Had the unit in stitches. What do we do, put toilet water in the mouth. I mean really. And this same md for another pt wrote, Change Prevacid to 30 mg IV. Well, he should have looked at his own orders because the Prevacid was 30 mg IV since the pt was admitted.
And another nurse noted that the MD wrote, if pt dies, don't call me or any resident. Huh?