A Man's Perspective: My Life With A Nurse - page 2

I received this from my sister-in-law-thought it was too funny not to share. Enjoy! My Life With A Nurse, by Rick Williams Ah, such mysterious, wondrous creatures are nurses. What treasures... Read More

  1. by   Brownms46
    Originally posted by nightmoves
    ROFLMAO!!!

    How true, how true!

    I loved the part about never going to dinner with more than one nurse.

    My husband served with the Army Special Forces in Vietnam (the Green Berets of song and story.) He frequently comments that I could easily outgross him and his old Army buddies.

    I got the chance last summer. A buddy of his who was a helicopter pilot assigned to his team visited us with his wife (who is also a nurse, also working in acute care.) We entertained them on our boat, and then went to dinner at our yacht club (very informal, no navy blazers or strapless evening gowns here.)

    Dinner was lovely, until "Maggie" and I started to discuss postoperative care of complicated hepatic resections and Whipples. By the time we got to multisystems failure, we had cleared two adjacent tables and our husbands had quickly retired to the bar with pallid, greenish faces. We were a little hurt; those were some of our more "antiseptic" stories!

    And yes, despite what the Declaration of Independence says, not all men are created equal!
    The wimps... :roll:
  2. by   Fgr8Out
    Great anecdote~!!!!

    We actually HAD a patient this past week with the "Nurse As A Sex Kitten" fantasy.... :chuckle He kept making comments such as. "i wont tell your husband if you dont" and "I've always heard nurses were really HOT in bed..." yadda yadda ...which, of course, we ARE.... :chuckle Made me wanna "baliff...WACK his peepee!!" (k, i'm dating myself there...)

    sheesh.... SOME people, huh????
  3. by   JBudd
    When somebody gets fresh, I just look 'im in the eye and say, "there isn't an orifice in the human body that I haven't stuck a tube into at some point, and sometimes I create the orifice".
  4. by   Bossbutterfly
    Originally posted by JBudd
    When somebody gets fresh, I just look 'im in the eye and say, "there isn't an orifice in the human body that I haven't stuck a tube into at some point, and sometimes I create the orifice".

    I will remember that one!!!! If they only knew what these eyes have seen...what these hands have touched.... WHat Ive stepped in....
  5. by   bassbird
    I just had to respond to the "baliff... wack his pee pee" line. Was it Cheech and Chong?

    I used to love that line! I'm a new nurse and from the sounds of it I will need some of those line in the near future :roll
  6. by   rnor
    :chuckle I love it!! Had to print it so my co-workers could read your story...everything you said is so true...
  7. by   AmandaDawn
    Did this guy know what he was talking about or what I e-mailed it to my fiance and all my fellow Nsg school classmates and every other nurse I know.

    Thanks for sharing

    :roll
  8. by   gwenith
    I loved this one and thought it worth another go around!!!
  9. by   funnygirl_rn
    Good ones, thanks!!!
  10. by   karenG
    what can I say?? this man knows us!!!!

    Karen
  11. by   Jay-Jay
    LOVE IT!!

    Thanks for bumping it, Gwenith!
  12. by   rnnurse2be
    Originally posted by fedupnurse
    The beauty of being able to clear a room. Picture this if you dare: 10 ICU nurses out at a bar for lunch. The place was far more crowded than usual and we needed a couple of more places for a couple of latecomers. SO my friend Pat says "watch this!" Hey who took care of that guy last night whos fecal bag ruptured? What was there like a liter of crap in that bag. Heard it was explosive... The more she said (and Pat is anything but quiet) the less crowded the tables around us got. Come to think of it, I rarely have to wait for a table when out with nurse/medical friends!
    :roll :roll :roll
    OH MY GOSH... I about PMP!!! SSOOOOOO FUNNY!! I have a group of friends and I can see this happening!!!!
  13. by   rnnurse2be
    Originally posted by JBudd
    When somebody gets fresh, I just look 'im in the eye and say, "there isn't an orifice in the human body that I haven't stuck a tube into at some point, and sometimes I create the orifice".
    OH Bawhaahwwwww thats sooo funny!

    Oh my gosh, these posts are the funniest thing Ive read today!!:roll

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A Man's Perspective: My Life With A Nurse