A.A.A.D.D.- Age Activated Attention Ds.

  1. Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D.- Age Activated

    Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:

    I decided to wash my car. As I start toward the garage, I

    notice that there is mail on the hall table. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the trash can under the table and notice that the trash can is full.



    So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out

    the trash first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.



    I take my checkbook off the table and see that there is only

    one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I find the ice tea that I had been drinking.



    I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push

    the tea aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

    I see that the tea is getting warm, and I decide I should

    put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.



    As I head toward the kitchen with the tea, a vase of flowers

    on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered.

    I set the tea down on the counter, and I discover my reading

    glasses that I've been searching for all morning.



    I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm

    going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on

    the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot

    the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I

    realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, we will be looking for the remote, but nobody will remember that it's

    on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den

    where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.



    I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills on

    the floor, So I set the remote back down on the table and

    get some paper towels. Then I head down the hall trying to

    remember what I was planning to do.



    At the end of the day: the car isn't washed, the bills

    aren't paid, there is a warm glass of tea sitting on the

    counter, the flowers aren't watered, there is still only one check in my checkbook, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really
    •  
  2. 3 Comments

  3. by   gwenith
    Here are some more "senioor moments"

    Three old pilots are walking on the ramp. first one says,
    "Windy, isn't it?"
    Second one says,"No, its Thursday!"
    Third one says, "So am I. Lets go get a beer."

    ----------------------------------

    A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid.
    It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It 's perfect."

    "Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?"

    "Twelve thirty."

    ------------------------------------
    Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
    A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm.

    A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?" Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.' "

    The doctor said, " I didn't say that. I said,

    'You got a heart murmur. Be careful.'"

    ------------------------------------

    As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car
    going the wrong way on Interstate 280. Please be careful!"

    "It's not just one car," said Herman.

    "It's hundreds of them!"

    ---------------------------------------

    An elderly gent was invited to his old friends' home for dinner one evening. He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms-Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc...

    The couple had been married almost 70 years, and clearly they were still very much in love. While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over and said to his host, "I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names." The old man hung his head.

    "I have to tell you the truth," he said, "I forgot her name about 10 years ago.
  4. by   jnette
    Wonderful, PRN ! (and Gwenith)... Loved them ! ESPECIALLY the FIRST one (A.A.A. D.D.) Boy, can I relate to that !

    The others were super, too. Got a few friends I definately need to share these with .


    Thanx for sharing .
    Last edit by jnette on Apr 5, '03
  5. by   gwenith
    Not mine but I think it's worth repeating here

    My forgetter's getting better
    But my rememberer is broke
    to you that may seem funny
    but, to me, that is no joke

    For when I'm "here" I'm wondering
    If I really should be "there"
    And, when I try to think it through,
    I haven't got a prayer!

    Oft times I walk into a room,
    Say "what am I here for?"
    I wrack my brain, but all in vain
    A zero, is my score.

    At times I put something away
    Where it is safe, but, Gee!
    The person it is safest from
    Is, generally, me!

    When shopping I may see someone,
    Say "Hi" and have a chat,
    Then, when the person walks away
    I ask myself, "who's that?"

    Yes, my forgetter's getting better
    While my rememberer is broke,
    And it's driving me plumb crazy
    And that isn't any joke.

close