I'm not sure if I'm cut out for this

[cherryharlean]

I'm a college student right now, majoring in Psychology. There is no nursing major here, so I'm kind of stuck with whether I should continue with my psych major or transfer to nursing school instead.

But besides all that technical stuff, I'm doubting whether I want to be a nurse. I mean, I definitely want to be a nurse. I just don't know if I can handle it.

My personality seems outwardly perfect for nursing, because I like to help people and listen to them. I'm sympathetic and compassionate. I don't freak out about wounds or blood or anything like that. But the thing is that I do get irritated with people sometimes, especially when I feel like they are using me or not appreciating what I do for them. I don't mean like I want them to shower me with gifts for all my fantastic work, but if they just use me everytime they need something and never say at least a simple thank you. I know that nurses may go through this with some people. I do admit that I am not infinitely patient and angelic. I don't show this anger or frustration outwardly but I keep it inside, until I get home, or talk to my friends.

I also have a major problem with women telling me what to do. Don't ask me why. I don't mind if a male asks me to do something but if a female tells me to do something, or bosses me around, or acts like she is better than me in any way, I get really irritated. So I'm thinking that this will be a problem when a female doctor tells me to do something...

And the problem that affects me as of this point is that I am NOT good at math or science. I am really good at English and history, and everyday I question why I am trying to be a nurse when nursing has nothing to do with language or history.

I don't know. In my heart, I know that nursing is my calling, but then I list out all these things and I think that maybe I shouldn't pursue this. I know this was a LONG post, but I'm really confused right now.

Is there anyone else that is going through this or knows what I'm talking about? Is there anyone that is doubting their career choice?

Should I just go for my dream, even though there is a possibility for failure?

Thanks for any advice, I really do appreciate it.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

It's great that you are self-aware. If you take the attitude that these are things you need to change about yourself, then you're on your way. If you take the attitude that there's nothing you can do about it, then forget it because you're going to have a tough time in nursing and you should find another career plain and simple.

However, I would like to encourage, rather than discourage you.

Issue #1 - Nursing is not necessarily a thankless job, Most people have manners and do indeed say thank you. Some even send cards, candy and nice notes to administration. But there are going to be plenty of patients and families that no matter what you do it isn't going to be good enough. I work in a tough environment myself and have to listen to whining complaining patients and family members after I've just broken my back trying to make a difference, or even in fact rescured them from a potentially dangerous outcome. At the end of the day if I know I've worked hard, given my personal best (and that varies from day to day), then I have to find satisfaction from within.

Issue #2 - Again, it's good that you're self-aware that you have this issue. Maybe you can talk it over with someone as to where it comes from and that might help you overcome it. Don't worry about female doctors, (however, we are at a time for the first time in history female med school students are the majority), worry first about your female instructors, preceptors, charge nurses and managers. From Day 1 in nursing school you are going to be directed, taught and judged by female instructors because 90% of instructors out there are female (not really, I'm making that up, but male instructors are rare because the pay is so low) and trust me they can put up on negativity right away. You have to learn to accept delegation from females plain and simple. You have to accept that as a student and new grad you're at the bottom of the totem pole and chances are females are going to be directing you. I've always had female bosses and right now my bosses boss is female as well. In fact there is only one male nurse manager in my facility.

I also work with several female interns and residents and it's not like Grey's Anatomy. Give respect and you will get it. It's easy.

Issue #3 - Math is something you must conquer in school, but in the real world we're lucky to have pharmacists and machines do our calculations so once you get through school you should be fine. Most schools have labs and tutors available should you need it. Many people buy into a self-concept "I'm no good in math", and it becomes self-perpetuating. Change how you talk to yourself saying "I have the intelligence to learn math and be a competent math student" rather than defeat yourself.

Good luck!

[cherryharlean]

This is a very belated thank you- but THANK YOU for that reply!! :)

I really mean it when I say it changed my mind, and reassured me. Thanks a million!