I am having the hardest time making a career decision

  1. 0
    Maybe I can get some perspectives from you all. Here is the story: I have a really good job at a smaller community hospital outside of Dallas Texas. I love my co-workers and I am respected among my peers. The pay is ok. I am a mom of a school age daughter (5th grade) and have a supportive husband. I have no family in this area, they live in Europe. Recently I had an amazing job offer from Sharp hospital in San Diego. Great position, great pay. I haven't accepted yet because I am torn. Do I move my whole family out of this small Texas town that we are so comfortable in, or do I take a leap of faith and take the job in San Diego to advance my career? If I was a single female, the choice would be simple. But is my career worth changing my whole daughter's world and everything she has ever known? I just don't want to be selfish. My husband's career is very flexible and he said that he will support me what ever decision I make for us. How would you choose?
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  4. 10 Comments so far...

  5. 0
    I think you should assess if your daughter has a bubbly personality, or if she is quiet.

    If she is bubbly, moving to Cali will be no problem, as she will make new friends almost immediately.
    If she is quiet, moving may be more difficult for her.

    However, if she is going from 5th to 6th grade, she may be changing schools anyway (in my part of the US, K-5th = elementary, 6th-8th is Middle School)

    Either way, im sure you daughter would end up adapting.
  6. 0
    Quote from blackvans1234
    I think you should assess if your daughter has a bubbly personality, or if she is quiet.

    If she is bubbly, moving to Cali will be no problem, as she will make new friends almost immediately.
    If she is quiet, moving may be more difficult for her.

    However, if she is going from 5th to 6th grade, she may be changing schools anyway (in my part of the US, K-5th = elementary, 6th-8th is Middle School)

    Either way, im sure you daughter would end up adapting.
    Good point. She is quiet and shy, so that gives me something else to add to the pro/cons list.
  7. 0
    I think it'd be easier for her to adjust in the 5th grade versus as a teenager or even as a middle schooler. There is so much fun stuff to do in San Diego, she could end up loving it! And moving may make her open up and lose some of her shyness. I would have killed to be able to grow up in CA!

    I live in CA now and really prefer the quality of life here. The only thing I don't like about living in this state is the high cost of living.

    Sharp is a good hospital too.
  8. 3
    Yes, the salaries a lot better out here...then again, the cost of living is much higher. You'll find that your increased salary won't go as far as you think.

    Tough call--it sounds like you have valid reasons for and against moving. Have you asked HER what she thinks about moving? Not saying you have to take what your daughter says as the final decision, but if she's in 5th grade, she's old enough to (IMO) have some input into the decision...or at least you can find out what she thinks.

    My only advice is that if you're going to relocate, this would be the time to do it. Once she gets into junior and (especially!) senior high school, it would be much harder on her to leave, especially if you don't really have to move. If you don't decide to do it now, then wait until she's older.

    Best of luck whatever you decide!
    NurseOnAMotorcycle, prnqday, and GrnTea like this.
  9. 0
    As long as your hubby are in agreement with the move after weighing the pros and cons then you should do it. I don't know about anyone else but when I was in 5th grade, I didn't have a choice on whether or not to move. I didn't make the decisions in my household, I stayed in a childs' place. I'm not saying your daughter's feelings does not count but realize she is in 5th grade and may not have the capicity to make such a grown up decision. I would definitely ask her how she feels about the move and prepare her ahead of time if/when you move. I also trusted my mother that she knew what was best for us and the family.
    Good luck with your decision.
  10. 0
    Quote from Ivana RN-BC
    Maybe I can get some perspectives from you all. Here is the story: I have a really good job at a smaller community hospital outside of Dallas Texas. I love my co-workers and I am respected among my peers. The pay is ok. I am a mom of a school age daughter (5th grade) and have a supportive husband. I have no family in this area, they live in Europe. Recently I had an amazing job offer from Sharp hospital in San Diego. Great position, great pay. I haven't accepted yet because I am torn. Do I move my whole family out of this small Texas town that we are so comfortable in, or do I take a leap of faith and take the job in San Diego to advance my career? If I was a single female, the choice would be simple. But is my career worth changing my whole daughter's world and everything she has ever known? I just don't want to be selfish. My husband's career is very flexible and he said that he will support me what ever decision I make for us. How would you choose?
    I can totally understand what u r going through right now .. I moved to UK when my kids were in 3rd & 5th Grade .., they settled very well in the schools.., then I moved to Canada when my kids were in 7th & 8th grade... & they have settled very well here as well.., Thanks to God... The reason I am saying this is cos I believe children are very resilient... They adapt quickly... My daughter is also very quiet n shy but she has made new friends.. I think it adds on to their personality and gives something extra to learn to adapt to new environment .. If u think its best for ur career move then go ahead ..whatever u do.. Good luck with that xx
  11. 0
    You all are so encouraging. I love that about this board. I guess I am questioning my decision because if I make a bad one, it will affect all of us and not just me.
    Well.....I have made the first step and applied for CA license endorsement. I have also requested finger print cards. I told the director who interviewed me that we will have to fly to San Diego during spring break and make a decision after that. She was very supportive. Thankfully the area has some really great public schools.
  12. 0
    Just remember the grass isn't always greener and with the cost of living so much higher it won't be as big of a raise as you expect. With that being said, there was a reason you applied and if you don't do this you will always wonder. Since you have no major ties to the area and you're husband is willing I'd say go for it! I think you're daughter is at a good age now-I think it would be harder the older she gets. I think traveling there over spring break is a great idea. That way you can get a true feel for the area. If it just doesn't work out then move back but don't let the fear of it not working out keep you from going. Good luck!
  13. 0
    I would do it! You can always move back to your current area but you may never get this opportunity again.


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