20 Years Later...

Gone is the activism. Gone is the mentoring, under-the-wing, supportive person I used to be. I see the serious downgrading of the health care professions through a growing socialist agenda. The usurpation of the hospital setting by administrators that couldn't care less about patient care, so long as JCAHO gives them a "thumbs up" and the profits continue.

I started out my career as one of the few men in the field. Most people thought we (male RNs) were gay. Most nurses held deeps suspicions that "we" were trying to "take over" nursing. I've had more than a few managers that made me feel like I was their own personal whipping post, working off the frustrations of an over-bearing husband, father, brother, boyfriend, etc...

Now that most of those growing pains in nursing are past, where is the relief?

My shifts each hold more and more stress: worrying about taking PROPER care of my patients, having help to accomplish what I need for my pts, having more to accomplish than one person should, no breaks, maintaining multiple certifications - recertifying every 2 years, physicians that don't listen, management that doesn't care, going home each day and for the first hour or two running through the day's events trying to remember if everything got done, signed, noted, checked, co-signed, consented, documented, copied, cleaned, counted, etc...

ER was my love for many years and now each shift is the beginning of 12 hours of quick decisions, occasional assaults, sour stomach, self-doubt, watching out for what my co-workers do, etc, ad infinitum...

I want out of nursing SO bad. But, at 50 years old, people think something is "wrong" with me for trying to leave nursing. Can't even get a job interview for anything non-nursing. I've been in industrial sales, a machine-tool electrician, medical equipment repair, programmer, computer sales/service. No one will give me an opportunity to move on to something else...

Well, thanks for letting me vent...

Me...