Life just sucks sometimes.

It's because of situations like this that it's so hard to get legitimately sick people hospitalized.

Edit: I'm sure glad we don't live in a world where children just do what their parents say, no questions allowed. There are situations where that is appropriate, but if the child will be harmed? That's another story.

74% divorce rate? Where did that statistic come from? I understand that statistics can be altered to make them say whatever you want them to. I also understand that in some areas, it's almost gauche to stay together if you have kids. I've never heard of parents divorcing so their kids won't feel left out, but I'm sure it's happened.

Edit #2: When my pastor was in seminary in the 1970s, his first wife left him (no kids) and his mom threw a fit because "What are the neighbors going to think?" Um, maybe they don't care because it's none of their business? Anyway, a couple years ago, he was going to accompany some people on a mission trip in our region and cancelled because of a "family emergency." We found out later that his parents were separating after 60 years of marriage! His dad had turned 83, and realized he might not have much time left and said, "Your mom's control freak issues are worse than ever. I just can't live with her any more." I do not know if they got divorced.

My sister is 38, and when she was in high school, she wanted our parents to divorce because kids at school were teasing her for having married parents! Can you believe it! Meanwhile, 40 years earlier my grandparents divorced (for some very good reasons) and a lot of parents wouldn't allow their kids to associate with my dad and his siblings any more.

You just can't win.

What a wonderful, inspiring story! My husband died of a medical incident 4 yrs ago (read my first thread) and my world turned upside down. Not only did my husband die, leaving me with a 9 and 10 yr old but it wiped out my career too. Since then life has been one large black hole that I fell deeper into every year. I too, have been using antidepressants and Lorazapam on and off for the last 4 years. I was unable to afford therapy as I still have Kaiser, and their MD's were partially responsible for his death and I have no trust in their healthcare providers. God please help me if I ever have to rely on them for a serious, major medical event.

So after my med mal settlement, and then from re-reading the words of encouragement from the nurses on my first thread, I found a therapist who lets me pay a reduced fee and I pay for it my self. His first recommendation was that I not take antidepressants as he felt my depression was something that I needed therapy for, not drugs. So I have been Paxil free, and almost Lorazapam free for 5 mths now, and therapy is slowly working. I still have a long ways to go, and will probably never work as an RN again but there is hope in my future instead of blackness. There is a small light at the end of the tunnel.

So what have I learned so far? Life is suffering, living life is painful and now I have one more I can add-- LIFE CAN BE SUCKY! But until you work through the pain and suffering and issues that life throws you, you are doomed in run around in circles. It takes real courage to face issues and learn to cope and change, and therapy is not easy.

Antidepressants are for people who do have chemical imbalances and need the drugs to function, not for the majority of us that have depression from having a sucky life or situation.

I also feel insurance companies are behind the push for antidepresssants as it is cheaper to fill a $10 rx for Paxil/Prozac than to pay for therapy. Too many people I know are on antidepressants and therapy was never even mentioned. They need to learn how to cope with life, and stop running around in circles.

And having a sucky life should be a ICD-9!

I have to agree with Grandma! My life sucked, and I was depressed. I had owned my own business in Canada, gave up everything and moved the the US to be with my husband. I could not however work, so I stayed home with the children, home schooled them and focused on our family. Nothing wrong with that, but I found myself getting more and more depressed.

I had a revelation last summer that I needed challenges and really had none! I had already figured I wanted to be a nurse, but I didn't have the self-confidence (or figured my hubby would let me) to go back to school (I'm 40). Well, I did it! I started with a couple classes and got A's. I feel GREAT! I haven't had a depressive episode in a long time. I have goals again and challenges and I feel great! This is the best I have felt in my whole life. All I can say is if your not happy with your life, do something about it! I did and I am so happy, and so is my family. Its wonderful!

you go girl

Great post. I completely agree with you. I know too many people whos "brains are making them sad", so they happily take those expensive antidepressants, when clearly from anyone elses perspective, their life sucks, but it was them who made it that way in alot of cases. (not all). These are the kind of people who dont realize that they need to make their own lives better to be happier. So they contine to take these medications, not without side effects and continue on in their ignorant bliss because "its not their fault", and never even consider doing something to fix their crappy lives. I just dont get society. I understand that there are real mental illnesses, but these days, everyone has a mental illness. Its like a pandemic really.

And there are a lot of people whose bad decisions were influenced by their depression or other mental illness.

Another part of the problem is our language.

You aren't 'depressed' because your life is sucky. You are sad. When it progresses to the point where you not only have physical symptoms but they affect your life functions THEN you are depressed.

Like the person that experiences a loss and thinks they are depressed. Nope, that's not even depression. That's grief. It can turn into depression but people need to remember that sadness and grief aren't depression.

We throw the word around to much.

When I was in college, I had a relationship that tanked (half my fault) and I went to see the psychiatrist at the Quack Shack (our nickname for Student Health ) because I just wasn't getting over it, and she wanted to put me on Prozac that very first visit! At the time, I didn't know enough about Prozac to really have an opinion and the drug was relatively new as well, but I declined because I was not depressed! Plus, I really didn't have $70 a month to spend on something I didn't need.

I HAVE experienced clinical depression. This wasn't it.

Some of my favorite stories and life lessons are from my grandparents as well.....what a wealth of knowledge and love they are......



Well.....

It takes 2 ingredients to make a rainbow



Sun

and

Rain


It is like everything else in life.....would we recognize true beauty if there wasn't ugly to compare it too....

What about sweet and sour......


Life is a journey...it is easy to get stuck in places like sadness....either through not knowing, wanting, or realizing it we, as humans, live where we are. Less of us take the roads less traveled in our own lives, we walk the same worn paths we walk most of our lives only to wonder why our shoes are worn and our feet sore. Sometimes in life we must take a turn in a new direction, not forgetting our past, but making a different future. Just remember it is about the journey, not the destination.

CONGRATULATIONS on finding some peace.....

Its also all that marketing on the TV or idiot box. Your life will be so much better if you take whatever. Please talk to your doctor. Then the Doctors nowadays are so prescription happy.