What is it with nurses and cell phones? Just a vent.

Guest343211 · Sep 9, 2012

As long as they're used appropriately, I don't see the problem either. We're all adults, we should know where the line is.
With that said, the whole "cell phone culture" does amuse and baffle me. Who are you texting? Why do people care about knowing every mundane detail of their friends' lives? And I'm not so sure the world is really that much more dangerous now than it was 40 years ago. It just *seems* like it because of the 24 hour news cycle.
Let's face it, modern media has made us a nation of melodramatic, paranoid people with very short attention spans.

Yes. I must agree with ^ this.

And how in the world does this have ANYTHING to do with being a good mom????? I have children, and I've managed to be a good mom without the cellular-to-umbilical-cord issue? Imagine this as if you were at work receiving multiple calls through the work phone from your kids or whomever? It's call etiquette and professionalism.

It's not like your cell phone is a CR monitor that you have to carefully watch or any high tech piece of equipment connected to your patient in a critical care unit--where you have to keep a close eye on the patient and these devices--even with carefully set alarms.

BTW, the phone has an alarm. It's called vibrate. After that, it's up to the user to say, "Excuse me," and then carefully check his/her phone. Geez, combine it with a brief bathroom break. I mean, who doesn't have to pee on a 8 or 12 hour shift? Although, I must say, I've had patients so sick, that it has been very hard to take a 3 minute pee break, but usually, you can do it.

I go to work to work. I'm not not telling people not to check their messages from time-to-time. I am saying limit it, be brief, and use etiquette. Etiquette is important because it shows courtesy for others--and IMHO, it also shows professionalism.

I think most people here are talking about those people that have to check their phones so frequently and openly, that it's like an issue of national security. Clearly, these people have a problem with wisely using these devices.

If you are getting a bunch of silly or unimportant, non-emergent, non-work-related texts, message back, "I'm at work. Can't chat" or whatever.

The really special people are those that think it's cute to continue with gossip-texting throughout their shifts. Really? They know who they are, and so do those that work with them.

Again, it's about using good judgment and showing respect for others and for what you are doing.

iluvivt, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2012

Yes..... during any class I silence my phone...but I absolutely will NOT turn it OFF. I am the ONLY parent my daughter has and she has had a lot of medical problems. So yes I am one of those people that will be available for my daughter to text me if she needs to. I usually call her before I go into a class or a test and make sure she has someone to call if she cannot get to me. Everyone's life situation is different and people have different resources.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Sep 9, 2012

To answer your question, nothing changes. To a certain degree, those who feel the need to "stay in touch in case of an emergency" know this too. But, see...........its not about helping the situation so whether they actually can help or if they are powerless to do anything is a mute point.
There is a very specific personality type that insists on "keeping in touch in case of an emergency". As you read the posts by the people from this group, you will find they all sound very much alike. Read their posts only, skipping over the comments by other people, and you'll start to think they are one person posting under different accounts.
That personality type would be OCD (using the term in a slang, non-clinical way). The issues relating to the need for control OVER EVERYTHING AT ALL TIMES bleeds from their words and actions. Heck, even if you use the clinical definition of OCD, one of the symptoms is "REPEATED CHECKING" lol. You'll also notice a theme amongst this group concerning their inability to let anyone else handle a problem that arises. I counted two who said their spouse lacked the "common sense" to handle emergencies hence they needed to be available to coach them through things. Practically made it sound as though their spouses were one burnt brain cell away from collecting disability or something. But, again its about control, not about helping the situation. Letting the spouse handle the situation would be relinquishing control. Can't do that, they wouldn't get their fix. Much better to belittle our spouse and treat them like children also.
Truth is, its not about being concerned for a loved one or wanting to help with w/e situation that arises. Its about wanting to "be in control", and being at work on the job or at the doctor's office/clinic is not going to stop them from getting their fix. There is no focus on anyone else's needs in their actions. Any parent who is focused on what is best for their child and family would not use the "I'm going to be on my phone when I need to be, get over it, I have a family" approach in life. People get fired for less. From what I understand, unemployement is not something that helps family functioning. Maybe they have found some way to handle homelessness and still care for their loved ones.
The really sad part is, what these people consider "emergencies" and what comes to mind for us when they use the term are................completely different. I have many co-workers who are constantly handling family business and "emergencies" at work. From what I can tell, none of it is truly anything to get excited about. Most of it is an emergency of the "You need to take out the trash" or "We are low on milk" variety. But, remaining completely in touch in case there is an (lol, cough, ahem) emergency satisfies their need to be in control so.............good luck explaining to them how far over the line they've gone. They need the feeling of control more than they need your approval.

This is the best explanation of the whole phenomenon I've ever heard. Thank you.

JZ_RN · Sep 9, 2012

What is SUCH an emergency that it couldn't wait for you to get in touch with your kids/husband/nanny/mailman/etc in a half an hour?? Seriously.
And in case you've forgotten, you are being compensated to attend all these "ridiculous" mandatory meetings and classes at work. Who cares if you don't care about the content, or are too smart for it. Someone higher up obviously does, and they are paying you for it.
Show some respect.

They don't always pay you for them but they're mandatory nonetheless, how about having some respect for me, my family, my free-time, my sleep?

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2012

They don't always pay you for them but they're mandatory nonetheless, how about having some respect for me, my family, my free-time, my sleep?

Then that is an issue with your employer that should be addressed. If it is mandatory, then they need to be ponying up the pay. Otherwise, it is voluntary.

JZ_RN · Sep 9, 2012

And the single moms or mothers period do use that as an excuse. Anyone can have an emergency, not just "single moms" or "mothers". I find that women use the excuse of single motherhood and their kids and beat it to death in order to get their way.

I told everyone in my family, if i'm at work., call my cell phone if there's an emergency. I probably will be working, but call multiple times, then I'll feel it vibrate and KNOW it's an emergency and have to go and answer somewhere. This has never happened. And I've never been reprimanded or called out for phone use at work, because I rarely if ever do use my phone while working. At lunch, yeah. Some people have too many emergencies because they plan poorly and their families plan poorly. However, to tell me "no cell phones", when I know my family will likely not be able to reach me by calling work if there were an emergency... I'm keeping my cell phone in my pocket. No one will likely ever even know. I'm not a child and won't be treated as such. Some people have no respect for their jobs or co-workers, bosses, or patients and use the phone excessively. It makes me annoyed when people are calling using the work phones too, meanwhile I need to contact pharmacies, patients, or insurance companies.

As mentioned by me several times before though, pointless trainings and mandatory meetings are different. I am a nurse, I don't need to go to meetings about budgets every 2 weeks. I am not an accountant. I don't waste things or steal from my job. I don't care about saving 3 cents by working myself to death and cutting staffing. I care about patient care and I do a good job at it. I've never been to a meeting or training that helped me do my job better or improved morale in any way so if I want to use my phone, I will. Don't whine about respect when you don't respect my time, hard work, or intelligence at all and show it blatantly.

This topic shows me just how little management does respect it's staff by treating them like children over a phone. If a nurse uses her phone like a toy while actually working, she's a poor employee anyways. Address that nurse, don't treat us all like idiots. Don't mandate "no phones" like we're in junior high school. You don't seem to mind me using my phone when the managers call for picking up shifts.

I think the people complaining about phones really need to pick their battles better anyways. It's not life and death and if it is, that's a horrible nurse anyways.

JZ_RN · Sep 9, 2012

Then that is an issue with your employer that should be addressed. If it is mandatory, then they need to be ponying up the pay. Otherwise, it is voluntary.

I did leave a facility that required you attend unpaid meetings. They weren't voluntary, you got fired or reprimanded for not coming. But you see the total lack of respect management can have for the staff is a real issue.

allnurses Guide · Sep 9, 2012

Woah woah calm down spidey's mom! I was simply expressing my amusement how an innocuous object could expose so much division and contempt among people. While I am totally neutral on this and don't care either way, I think it's just inevitable culture change as technology changes. One side is adamant that it's disrespectful. The other side thinks it's perfectly normal to text anywhere, everywhere. What can be done?
By the way, nurses are actually given iPhones on my floor and we text each other all the time with work-related messages. If you walk into our hospital and see nurses on their phones, don't be mad!

I wasn't un-calm. :coollook: Just giving you some examples of other areas.

This issue is huge - comedians joke about it, there are editorials all over the country about it.

My point was, it isn't just allnurses.com or nurses.

And the OP was talking about people who are being rude and disrepectful. Not those who keep their phone on vibrate and check messages later.

Our hospital doesn't condone this behavior but nurses and docs use their own cell phones to text each other all the time. In fact, when I was on call I got a text in the middle of the night one time from a nurse who is glued to her phone and texts. When I didn't respond (I was asleep), she texted another nurse who then CALLED me. I heard the phone - I didn't hear a little quiet beep in the middle of the night. I was livid - my patient needed a nurse asap. I'm not a part of the texting culture and the policy is CALL the nurse on call.

(p.s. I'm still calm :) )

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2012

My question to the single Moms: Why is there no other parent?

Barring being widowed young, the victim of rape or incest, having an unfaithful/abusive spouse that one gets divorced from, there should be another parent there.

Yes, some people choose to adopt as singles. This is not optimal FOR THE CHILD, and they should have thought this through ahead of time. Others choose donor sperm either through banking or the "he looks really hot and I looooovve him ssooooo much" method. Again this is not optimal FOR THE CHILD, and should have been thought through ahead of time.

And some have chosen single parenthood by choosing to marry/ be intimate with those that were very poor choices ..... And choosing to break up with them when they are no longer so "in looove with them". Leaving their children in a less than optimal situation, that they did not choose.

Roughly 70% of filings for divorce are initiated by women. The vast majority are not for domestic violence. Barring those for infidelity, domestic violence or desertion, there are a large number of women choosing to go it alone as parents. Which means they are deliberately putting their children and themselves in the single parenthood conundrum.

I am truly sorry, if you did lose a spouse young, if you were in an rape/incest/abusive relationship that left you as a single parent, and will offer you support as best I can.

But there are many who make their own choices that lead to single parenthood, or shut out the other parent, or choose a spouse that is poor parenting material, and then complain of "lack of compassion" from coworkers.

uRNmyway, ASN, RN · Sep 9, 2012

My question to the single Moms: Why is there no other parent?
Barring being widowed young, the victim of rape or incest, having an unfaithful/abusive spouse that one gets divorced from, there should be another parent there.
Yes, some people choose to adopt as singles. This is not optimal FOR THE CHILD, and they should have thought this through ahead of time. Others choose donor sperm either through banking or the "he looks really hot and I looooovve him ssooooo much" method. Again this is not optimal FOR THE CHILD, and should have been thought through ahead of time.
And some have chosen single parenthood by choosing to marry/ be intimate with those that were very poor choices ..... And choosing to break up with them when they are no longer so "in looove with them". Leaving their children in a less than optimal situation, that they did not choose.
Roughly 70% of filings for divorce are initiated by women. The vast majority are not for domestic violence. Barring those for infidelity, domestic violence or desertion, there are a large number of women choosing to go it alone as parents. Which means they are deliberately putting their children and themselves in the single parenthood conundrum.
I am truly sorry, if you did lose a spouse young, if you were in an rape/incest/abusive relationship that left you as a single parent, and will offer you support as best I can.
But there are many who make their own choices that lead to single parenthood, or shut out the other parent, or choose a spouse that is poor parenting material, and then complain of "lack of compassion" from coworkers.

I think of all of that is subject for an entirely different thread, and honestly, seeing how judgmental that was, I would not want to participate in it. How people choose to parent is absolutely none of your business. Sometimes, people just make the best out of a bad situation, whether it is because of abusive relationships, rape/incest, or just having a child with someone who turned out to be an incompetent idiot, male or female (by the way, I am not implying that is the case with my boyfriend, he does very well in general parenting, just not emergency situations).

My mother was a single parent, mostly because my dad went hog-wild when he became single again, and slowly started having less time to spend with us. Does that make my mom a bad person? Did I turn out any worst for it? I dont think so. That bull poop is another topic that grinds my gears, that of assuming that children raised by single parents dont do as well as those raised by a typical nuclear family unit. I have seen parents stay together for their kids sakes, meanwhile growing to hate each others guts. Do you think the kids cant see that? Kids can sense the tension, the animosity, and it affects them. I think THAT is worst than having two parents living apart, or even being raised by a single parent.

And that is not to say that it is not better for a child to be raised by two loving parents, who also love each other. But I just hate the assumption that single parents are doing something wrong by trying their best to raise their kids properly.

edmia, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2012

It isn't just allnurses. This is a hot-button issue everywhere because there is no cell phone common courtesy practiced and frankly, folks are sick of it.
It's a hot-button issue when I walk up to the nurses' station and see 3 nurses with their heads down texting furiously away. And this is not to children who are ill or in the ER or husbands who forgot how to diaper a baby. Mostly it is nurses who are gossiping.
It's a hot-button issue when you are in a restaurant and someone you invited out to dinner continues to look at their phone and texts back while you are trying to have a conversation.
It's a hot-button issue in a meeting with one person doesn't put their phone on silence and the ring-tone is their grandson singing an irritating song at full volume.
It's a hot-button issue when you are in class and you get distracted from what the teacher is saying by phones going off around you or people texting away.
Common courtesy means in a classroom or restaurant or meeting, you give the teacher, or your date or your co-workers some respect.
When I'm giving report on a hospice patient and that co-worker's phone goes off . .. I lose my place.
I think this is normal - to get irritated by this issue. We aren't crazy. Yet.

You are right. The hot button issue isn't the device itself, but the disrespect that underlines the behavior.

I still disagree with having a no cell phone policy but that's because I am always present for the person in front of me. That may be my patient, co-worker, employee at a store, instructor in a class, my husband, whoever! Simple courtesy is something you can't make rules for, so those of us who are respectful and would use our devices appropriately, are dumbed down to the lowest common denominator: the ignorant amongst us.

Sent from my iPhone using allnurses.com

Ruas61, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2012

My question to the single Moms: Why is there no other parent?
Barring being widowed young, the victim of rape or incest, having an unfaithful/abusive spouse that one gets divorced from, there should be another parent there.
Yes, some people choose to adopt as singles. This is not optimal FOR THE CHILD, and they should have thought this through ahead of time. Others choose donor sperm either through banking or the "he looks really hot and I looooovve him ssooooo much" method. Again this is not optimal FOR THE CHILD, and should have been thought through ahead of time.
And some have chosen single parenthood by choosing to marry/ be intimate with those that were very poor choices ..... And choosing to break up with them when they are no longer so "in looove with them". Leaving their children in a less than optimal situation, that they did not choose.
Roughly 70% of filings for divorce are initiated by women. The vast majority are not for domestic violence. Barring those for infidelity, domestic violence or desertion, there are a large number of women choosing to go it alone as parents. Which means they are deliberately putting their children and themselves in the single parenthood conundrum.
I am truly sorry, if you did lose a spouse young, if you were in an rape/incest/abusive relationship that left you as a single parent, and will offer you support as best I can.
But there are many who make their own choices that lead to single parenthood, or shut out the other parent, or choose a spouse that is poor parenting material, and then complain of "lack of compassion" from coworkers.

Maybe you should publish your playbook for life. Your comments really defeat yourself.