New member awaiting evaluation from IPN

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    Hello everyone, my name is Amanda and I'm a RN who recently self reported to IPN for ETOH addiction. I've never had any action taken on my license, and thankfully I self reported in hopes of preventing any outside referrals to make this a mandatory decision to keep my license before any outside action was taken. I have HIGH hopes on beating this addiction, and want nothing more than to afford myself the opportunity to get myself better in order to give my pts 100% of me in regards to giving them the care they expect and deserve. I'm taking in a LOT all at once, and it's tough to accept what my self reporting has now made a mandatory responsibilty to accept if I hope to keep my RN license. There's no going back now, I just have to accept the consequences of my actions and do EVERY single thing I can do to comply with the program and take this 1 day at a time. I urge any people going through the IPN program to give me as much feedback as possible on how to be successful. My initial paperwork should arrive at IPN by tommorow at noon, and from there I'll set up my evaluation. My biggest step was saying I have a problem out loud, and then asking for help. I've also had to report to my work so I'm on FMLA as of 4 days ago, which i'm sure ruined a bunch of my colleagues vacation requests which also makes me feel guilty. All I can say is I've taken the 1st step and I'll be dealing with this everyday for the rest of my life. Any support is appreciated. I'll keep you all posted on my progress. Thank you for listening to a RN in need of friends in this VERY difficut time.
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  4. 16 Comments so far...

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    Hey Amanda - I'm Anne and I'm an addict. Welcome to the recovering nurses thread at AN. I hope u will find as much help and insight here as I have. Congrats on this first step to recovery you have taken.

    I live in La, and when I entered into our state's RNP, I was terrified! I had not learned about AN then, and just felt like the biggest failure! I had no one to go to - I will be glad to do anything I can - answer any questions, give input, or just listen. Again, welcome!!


    Anne, RNC
    sallyrnrrt likes this.
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    Hello Anne, I was so happy to get a reply on here! My initial paperwork is scheduled to be received today, and once it's received IPN has up to 4 days to contact me to set up my evaluation. This is definitely scary and uncharted territory for me! Glad I have somewhere I can go in the meantime to talk, helps to remind me I'm not alone! I'll keep you posted on my progress over the next 4 days... Thanks for listening! Hope you have a blessed day!
    Amanda
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    Hi Amanda. I was in IPN before returning to CA. One thing I found is that when you get the list of evaluators, research them as they can vary greatly in cost and approach. The closest may not be the best choice. A word of encouragement the IPN in FL is much more doable than the Diversion program was in CA. It's still not an easy road, but the fact that you were not diverting drugs at work will help.
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    Thank you for your reply Lisa! I will definitely keep in mind that the closest evaluator may not be the best choice, nor will the cheapest. I'll have to look at the evaluators specialtys to see who will be the smartest choice for my situation. I'm thankful that I did not have the problem of diversion at work and I hope that will work in my favor. I've actually already gone on the IPN website and completed the orientation course as a guest to help keep my mind focused during this waiting game. I appreciate everyone's words of support and kindness in these TOUGH times. I'll keep you all posted on my progress. Thank you for any and all support! It is much needed! <3
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    Welcome Amanda! I am an addict, I have had my liscense reinstated with five years probation. I am six months in, and u can do it!!! I was blessed that I was able to find a nursing job fairly quickly. Now, I am focusing in staying sober and fulfilling my requirements to the BON. It's very scary when u are starting the journey, but u will be better at the end. I have 2 years drug free. Good luck to you!!
    HammeRN likes this.
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    Hi Amanda, I'm a recovering alcoholic with over 21 years' sobriety, and I'm here to tell you that you can do this!! Getting and staying sober is the hardest thing you'll ever do in your life....but think of it this way, everything after that will be easy-peasy by comparison.

    I was fortunate in that I got sober a couple of years before starting pre-nursing classes, and learned from the BON of my state that if substance abuse was no longer a problem for me, it wouldn't be one for them. And it never has been, even though I still get an urge to drink every now and again.

    With me, ETOH was a form of self-medication for my then-undiagnosed bipolar disorder, and since I've been treated for it the cravings have subsided to the point where they're almost nonexistent. However, I still take responsibility for maintaining my sobriety and banish any thoughts of drinking FAST when they come along, usually only during times of severe stress. I did a lot of bad things when I was drinking and will spend the rest of my life making up for it, but that's OK. You have several years of a program to get through; at least there's an end to that, and I salute you for being proactive and volunteering to do it instead of the BON forcing you into it.

    I wish you the very best as you face down your demons and work to keep your nursing license. Please keep us posted on your progress, and remember: one day at a time. Sometimes it's even one CRISIS at a time, one HOUR at a time, even one white-knuckled MINUTE at a time. But you can make it.
    jadelpn, catmom1, HammeRN, and 1 other like this.
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    Thank you everyone so much for your support! I had my IPN evaluation today, and it was a LONG day to say the least! Had to say my problems out loud today to another medical professional, and it's scary cause your worried it might bite you in the ass later, if you're truly honest. Thankfully, my MD was very supportive, professional, and non-judgemental, as she is a recovering alcoholic as well. This confirms to me that I can beat this! She did, so why can't I? She said that the bad news was... I'm an alcoholic. The good news is... it is truly a treatable disease if I put in the work. And I intend to, 1 day at a time. It was wierd being the pt today. I had to get poked 3 times for them to get blood. As a nurse, I realized the poking doesn't hurt me a bit... It was a change being the one giving blood... Having someone watch me as I gave them a urine sample. My how the tables have turned... Wierd being a pt! She also told me that it is unsafe for me to try to stop drinking until I make it to a detox facility. She was very supportive and was actually calling IPN to try get my detox expedited before I even left the office. I just hope IPN can facilitate me getting the ball rolling sooner than later. Still not sure what my insurance is going to cover, and my bank account is a LOT lighter than I'd like it to be right now. The most important issue for me is to get sober and learn how to live my life without alcohol. Gonna be a LONG road. Any way, I really appreciate everyone's comments, and I'll keep you posted as I learn more about me treatent plan. THANK YOU ALL, from one struggling RN to another. <3
    remmsyaya, catmom1, TXRN2, and 1 other like this.
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    Quote from HammeRN
    Thank you everyone so much for your support! I had my IPN evaluation today, and it was a LONG day to say the least! Had to say my problems out loud today to another medical professional, and it's scary cause your worried it might bite you in the ass later, if you're truly honest. Thankfully, my MD was very supportive, professional, and non-judgemental, as she is a recovering alcoholic as well. This confirms to me that I can beat this! She did, so why can't I? She said that the bad news was... I'm an alcoholic. The good news is... it is truly a treatable disease if I put in the work. And I intend to, 1 day at a time. It was wierd being the pt today. I had to get poked 3 times for them to get blood. As a nurse, I realized the poking doesn't hurt me a bit... It was a change being the one giving blood... Having someone watch me as I gave them a urine sample. My how the tables have turned... Wierd being a pt! She also told me that it is unsafe for me to try to stop drinking until I make it to a detox facility. She was very supportive and was actually calling IPN to try get my detox expedited before I even left the office. I just hope IPN can facilitate me getting the ball rolling sooner than later. Still not sure what my insurance is going to cover, and my bank account is a LOT lighter than I'd like it to be right now. The most important issue for me is to get sober and learn how to live my life without alcohol. Gonna be a LONG road. Any way, I really appreciate everyone's comments, and I'll keep you posted as I learn more about me treatent plan. THANK YOU ALL, from one struggling RN to another. <3
    Best of luck..you can do this..we are here for you.
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    Thank you Michelle! I need all the prayers I can get! <3


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