More Confessions Of A Nurse Who Compulsively Eats

Compulsive eating disorder, also known as binge eating disorder, is a distressful problem for millions of people in the United States. However, this affliction dwells in the shadow of less prevalent eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia nervosa. The purpose of this article is to shed some more light on compulsive eating disorder. Nurses Announcements Archive Article

You are reading page 3 of More Confessions Of A Nurse Who Compulsively Eats

TheCommuter, BSN, RN

102 Articles; 27,612 Posts

Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.
You pinpointed your return to your former eating habits to May of last year. Did something trigger this? (It's a rhetorical question.) It sounds like you were on a track that was working for you and got derailed by some person or some thing. I know I'm treading on thin ice here because I'm not a therapist.
I usually weigh myself once a month, at the beginning of the month. I lose weight very slowly ever since becoming hypothyroid more than seven years ago, so it makes not much sense to weigh myself more frequently than once monthly.

Anyhow, I became disgusted and frustrated at myself at the beginning of May when I weighed myself and had lost no weight since the last weigh-in 30 days previously. I had been consistently eating 1500 calories per day and engaging in strenuous exercise five days per week. I was upset that I did not even lose half a pound per week. Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

I dealt with my frustration by slipping back into my old eating habits. It was supposed to be temporary, perhaps a week or so, but it snowballed and I was never able to get back on track.

multi10

180 Posts

Commuter, I understand. Back in May, it's possible that you didn't lose pounds on the scale because you gained muscle by exercising so much. Muscle weighs more than fat. One way to tell if you're getting fit is the way your clothes fit.

Maybe your body needed a rest from the strenuous exercise 5 days a week. You're already back on track.

what helps me is to just not buy fhe food. i buy the minimum at the grocery store. if i have chips and cake at home i will eat them. so i try to never buy anything like that or extra. i also try to exercise alot but since working as a nurse i am often too tired to do as much as before. i have found myself thinking of eating something when i am not hungry and feel like an addict . i can have tons of alcohol in my house and never drink a sip in months. i just dont want it. with most junk foods, i am not like that so i just dont buy it . also part of me feels embarassed to be seen buying it since i am not super super slim. ( i also know that is not completely normal either lol) . the time period where i was , i went to bed hungry, and was hungry many times through out the day and did hours of exercise. i dont know how some people can be that thin and not do the same. have a hard time believing it

multi10

180 Posts

I've visited an Eastern European country eight times over the past few years, typically spending 3 weeks each time. While there, we ate and drank to our heart's content. Upon returning to America we always noticed that we'd lost weight.

There are no preservatives in the food there.

joanna73, BSN, RN

4,767 Posts

Specializes in geriatrics.

To those who are providing tips for not overeating....we know it. I exercise, eat healthy, try distraction, and avoid bringing junk foods into the house. However, although I know it's unhealthy, and I am well aware that I should not binge, I will do so anyway. The emotional component remains regardless, and is deeply rooted for most over-eaters. There have been times when I have eaten a whole pizza and two whole cakes in one sitting. Terrible, yes. But I've done it anyway. When I want to binge, I go out and get whatever I want, then eat it all. Unless you've been through this, you won't understand why people binge.

rubato, ASN, RN

1,111 Posts

Specializes in Oncology/hematology.
I am also a compulsive eater, presently my eating is more controlled since I have little access to the foods I love. I have what is called "exercise bulimia" for years now. Instead of vomiting, I have been known to eat huge amounts of food, then work it off for 3-4 hours. Still a disorder, and just as unhealthy. My weight tends to fluctuate between 10-15 pounds above where it should be. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. The emotional components and distorted thinking still remain. Many of us are secret eaters, who you would never guess. Commuter, I hope you find the answers you're searching for.

Great article Commuter. I am so there with you. I am a food addict. I have a relationship with food that is all consuming. I, like joanna73, am an exercise bulimic. I have been a binge/purge bulimic in the past, but then I found that I could eat everything under the sun when training for marathons and ultra marathons. It was a fabulous new discovery (not so much).

My obsession is more about control. I'm a fabulous dieter. I am so obsessed with food that I love planning out what I'm going to eat all day right down to the calories and protein grams. When I was on Weight Watchers, I just turned my obsession for food from: how much can I eat, to how can I eat the most food for the least amount of points. I'm an ex personal trainer, so I know what foods we need to fuel our bodies. I know all about clean eating, protein, natural foods, blah, blah, blah....

When I'm not dieting, you should see me at an all you can eat buffet. My hubby weighs 250. I weigh 130. He's always joking about how I can out eat him. I can eat at least 4 or 5 plates of food and I leave feeling so sick I swear I'll never do it again. Then, I do.

All the advice in the world can't change the addiction. Believe me, it would be nice to just wake up and say "Today, I won't think about food", but we will. We will either think about what we want to eat, what we're going to eat, what we're not going to eat, or how can we get what we want to eat without someone seeing how much we're going to eat.

I want to have a normal relationship with food. I want to just eat when I'm hungry, stop when I'm full and pick something that's somewhat healthy, but still tastes good. I can't keep running these marathons! :)

amygarside

1,026 Posts

Thank you for sharing. It made me take a look on how I view food and eating. This can help me reflect about how I eat and the quantity of food I eat.

To those who are providing tips for not overeating....we know it. I exercise, eat healthy, try distraction, and avoid bringing junk foods into the house. However, although I know it's unhealthy, and I am well aware that I should not binge, I will do so anyway. The emotional component remains regardless, and is deeply rooted for most over-eaters. There have been times when I have eaten a whole pizza and two whole cakes in one sitting. Terrible, yes. But I've done it anyway. When I want to binge, I go out and get whatever I want, then eat it all. Unless you've been through this, you won't understand why people binge.
The thing that helps me is to not buy it. if the urge is strong enough anyone can just go out to the local open 24 hours a day supermarket but i rry not to as my levels of laziness usuay exceeds the urge. also i do the whole overexercising and sometimes undereating.

joanna73, BSN, RN

4,767 Posts

Specializes in geriatrics.

I used to live in a city of 24 hours. Anything and everything at my disposal. I was also a gym rat.....5-6 days a week, 3-4 hours a day sometimes. But then I was busy with work and school, so the roller coaster of exercising and eating ended for a while. Then my Mom died, so the cycle started again for a few months. Now, I live in a small town and nothing is open 24 hours. No take out, no store open late. As a result, my eating has been healthy and more controlled, only because I have few options. But I know myself very well. If the opportunity presents itself, I would binge again. Was I bingeing every day? Maybe 3 times a week some weeks. Still unhealthy...but it is about control. And I purposely don't buy certain foods. However, when you live in a 24 hour locale....woo hoo! A foodie's delight.

DizzyLizzyNurse

1,024 Posts

Specializes in Peds Medical Floor.
I think that some folks are missing the point.

Those who compulsively over-eat (especially nurses!) are well of aware of how they should be eating and exercising.

The problem isn't knowing better, it's the compulsion itself.

They can have a full stomach and still cram it in... because the fullness isn't what compels them to stop eating.

It is a psychological issue... an addiction, a compulsion, an obsession.

Not bringing junk food into the house is useless.

The car will be on empty, they will have $8 in change, it will be midnight and when the unholy urge to binge rears its ugly head, they will putz into the 7 Eleven on fumes and find the dang chips, pop and chocolate and mindlessly plunk that change out on the counter!

Focusing on healthy eating and execise habits certainly doesn't hurt, but it is not going to work very well without getting to heart of the problem... which is psychological, most likely depression and anxiety.

YES. It's very hard to explain that I get no pleasure out of binge eating. I don't taste the food, I feel soooo sick afterwards I wish I could throw up. I tried to make myself throw up when I was younger but physically couldn't make myself do it. I will be gagging because I have so much food in my belly, but in half an hour when I've digested a little of it and no longer feel sick I will shove more in until I'm sick again.

I've been to counseling, I've been on meds. None has helped much. Then I read a book on intuitive eating and that has helped tremendously. I also threw out my scale because that is a binge eating trigger. I started piano lessons because it keeps my brain and hands busy. You can't put food in your mouth when trying to play! And it gets my brain off thinking about food. I find it relaxing. Intuitive eating and when I still want to shove food in, I eat bags of frozen veggies, salads, and fruits prepared any way I want. I figure I'm still indulging the behavior which isn't good, but a salad or veggies won't hurt my body the same way eating an entire pizza will. I think I ate a full bag and a half of frozen veggies once. Cramps galore afterwards! But still felt less sick than I normally would have. I have lost weight, but I no longer weigh myself. Good luck!!!

Sweet Lady

5 Posts

...now I suspect, I have an eating disorder too....:nailbiting:

texan2011

41 Posts

I don't have an eating disorder, per se, but I do love to eat good food, and of course as I get older I cannot indulge as I used to. It's still hard to break habits and if I may, I would like to share some things that keep me from grabbing food because I am bored, tired or it just looks great because now any extra calories mean I have to buy a whole new wardrobe.

Kind of like keeping track of your savings for a budget -- go to one of the free online weight journal sites. Set a REASONABLE goal and keep track of your calories. If you know you have to write it down, it increases mindfulness. I have also heard from friends that the Overeaters Anon Group is excellent when nothing else works.

Plan something really fun as a reward (in my case I have a trip planned to Florida where I want to fit into my bathing suit without wearing a huge t shirt) to work towards --it made it easier to turn down the alcohol over the holidays (huge weight culprit). It could be a new outfit in a smaller size, an outing -- meeting a friend for coffee -- something rewarding to look forward to besides junk food or too much food.

Accept it's OK to feel hunger sometimes -- that's the only way I am able to get to the weight where I am happiest. I read that it sometimes takes a year for those hunger pains to go away once you reach a desired weight. I am learning to embrace the hunger as the only way I will reach my goal.

Get a weight loss buddy to report to.

Determine to cultivate and "sophisticate" your taste buds by gathering recipes and learning to cook some really tasty lo cal recipes -- like vegetables instead of a huge dinner! Now don't make a face. I cook a lot and when I do go back to fast food or store bought stuff -- it just doesn't taste good anymore because the quality is not there. Be pickier. In the last few weeks I experimented with a mayo-free cole slaw, crunchy walnut kale salad with balsamic vinaigrette dressing and some dried cranberries, oven roasted garlic brussel sprouts -- all were amazing and delicious, and you will not gain much weight even if you consume the entire pan. Eating SHOULD be wonderful. Just make your calories count. After you get used to really good quality food, you may not want the junk or at least you may not dream about it.

Just because some of us don't have an "eating disorder" does not mean this isn't hard. Unfortunately we are surrounded, bombarded and tempted by so much food -- good and bad. A trip into the local Quick Trip is like walking into a land mine. I remember when I was young -- maybe we had ten kinds of candy bars or sweets to pick from!!!