Okay- I feel like the walls have already started coming in on me and I haven't even put a dent in my pre-reqs yet. I went to orientation at my school the other day and kind of got an idea that one of the peer leaders was a nurse in recovery by something she said. I've known for a while that I will have to disclose the fact that I am in recovery when I apply for clinicals but what I found out has me in shock and disbelief- It seems way over the top- anyway- here's what happened:
I asked her about the whole disclosing issue and what happens from there. She said this is what I'll have to do if I want to continue on- I pay a $200 fee and go in front of a board where they ask questions regarding my addiction and treatment etc. Then every Monday through Friday for the entire time I'm in clinicals I'll be required to call someone (I guess like a probation officer or something?) and they can drug test me anywhere from 2-3 times a month. I have no worries about passing but it's a $15 collection fee and $35 processing fee each time- and so I'm looking at 100-150 dollars a month for drug testing the whole time I'm in clinicals- and I assure you I DO NOT have that kind of money- I'm basically on a grant and will be struggling as it is without that kind of dent in the bank. I am almost 21 months clean and this goes on until I make 5 years clean- I don't think it has to do with the school- maybe state? I don't know- but it just feels like punishment- and trust me- I "did my time" so to speak- I payed for my addiction and continue to do so, but my addiction is the reason for going into nursing- I want to work with addicts and I just get soo mad- I feel like a kid who is on the verge of a temper tantrum. I know I'll get through it, but I'm just so sick of being put in this position- I know it's all my own doing but I get disguted with this hand I've dealt myself and the consequences never cease! it just seems really unfair- and I know life is unfair and all but sometimes I just want a break from the judging and discrimination. I guess I just needed to vent about this- but doesn't it seem like a bit much? I know that they have to monitor somehow- but don't they know most college students are broke- especially nursing students!??? UGH! okay- I'm done- God, Grant me the serenity....
So, um, how random that a "peer"leader(read=fellow student only) mistakenly took your hypothetical or, uh, question for a 'friend' at such face value right?
Any chance the two of you could share a hoot about that little mix up next time you see them?
Seriously, i don't mean to make light but I'm not sure if, as you say, you 'knew' you'd have to disclose before clinicals...Disclosure, to my way of thinking, unless required as in actual licensing issues or as verifiable criminal record, is an individual choice and while I understand some folks feel otherwise I've always understood y'know, "unless to do so would harm" them. You, Princess, are also a 'them' in these scenarios......
Self disclosure while perhaps the ideal, and I do realize some feel they MUST do so to maintain their sense of rigorous honesty and to each their own, but I believe self disclosure doesn't need to be confused w/self-flagellation either.
I'm truly sorry this happened and if there were any way to put the genie back in the bottle until after school and the proper time comes with the licensing application(if your situation even requires the disclosure then) do know that I wish this could happen for you.
Also know that others have had to go through the process you describe and you know you CAN if you HAVE to also.
Last edit by Miss Mab on Jul 29, '08