Getting ready to self report - page 2

First le me start my saying i am a addict. i know this and cant control my behavior sometimes. I go on benges every two or three weeks that last two days. then i would get myself all cleaned up for work. I went to rehad twice. No... Read More

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    Quote from sharkiern357
    First le me start my saying i am a addict. i know this and cant control my behavior sometimes. I go on benges every two or three weeks that last two days. then i would get myself all cleaned up for work. I went to rehad twice. No dice just small times of recovery. My addiction is to cocaine by the way. I am not in trouble at work. the board is unaware. My job s great i just scare because its a new job and n still in the 90 Days. I talk to my jobs recovery program and they have a crap load of people in it. i means well over 150 in the system. Im in michigan so i will be going through HPRP. I been off work for a couple of days . i checked myself into the hospital under dehydration and stayed for two days the rehydrated me well andgot me back on my feet. im just sick of this marry go round. I think that if i had some accountablity i would get and stay clean. Just here looking for woords of encouragement and advice. Any people here currently of HPRP or have been through it.
    Let me just start by saying I, too, am an addict. I turned my back on HPRP about 2 years ago, and have regretted everyday. I am looking into trying to get back into the program and trying to get my license back. That's actually why I first got into this forum. When I was in HPRP I was always fighting back and trying not to accept the fact that I have an illness that requires treatment. My addicitonist and my therapist really did fail me during the program, not because they turned me in to become a regulated case, but because they didn't call me out sooner on all of my BS. If you have the chance to get yourself clean AND keep your license, do EVERYTHING in your power to do it. I regret where I am now and envy your position. I am throwing myself at their mercy to let me back in, and you have the opportunity to just walk in on your own terms. What I wouldn't give to be back to that place! Yes, recovery is tough, but everything that is worthwhile is! If you are seriously in love with nursing as much as I am, you need to do this. Get the help of an addictionist (find someone good in your area!!) and get clean!! I feel great now (clean for almost 3 years) and WISH that I would've kept my license when I had the chance. Good luck and keep us posted!!
    TXRN2 likes this.

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    I have a question- I was a non-regulatory participant in hprp and as I was finishing up my contract, my addictionist reported me as being too dependent on some of the meds I was on-- VERY VERY LONG STORY--- anyway, I was in a hissy fit, completely came undone and vowed that I was done with nursing, HPRP, etc. I didn't even start a regulatory contract because I didn't care if I lost my license. It was consequently suspended. And, yes, you probably already guessed it-- I MISS BEING A NURSE! I have had jobs that pay well, but lose interest so quickly because it just doesn't compare. I want to get my license back. I have contacted HPRP, but haven't heard from them yet. Has anyone had or heard of this situation? What happened? Do I stand a chance of getting back in? I've even moved back in with my parents so that I can afford it all again. I know this is crazy, but I can't be the first one this has happened to. Any advice would be appreciated!!
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    I would suggest contacting an attorney who has experience with Nursing Boards who can advise you on the best course of action.

    Good Luck.
    spartan813 and jackstem like this.
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    Quote from mona1023
    I would suggest contacting an attorney who has experience with Nursing Boards who can advise you on the best course of action.

    Good Luck.
    What she said!

    Jack
    spartan813 likes this.
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    I was given a name to call at the board, she was extremely friendly and helpful. I have sent in a "letter of intent" of sorts, and now I wait for a recommendation. Either the BON will be merciful and tell HPRP to let me back in, or I will hear to the contrary. Here's hoping for HPRP (wow, never thought I'd say that!). Thanks for your help!

    Jack, I wanted to give you a special shout. While contemplating all of this, I was reading some of the posts that pertain to recovery and found many of yours. What an inspiration! You really have persevered, and I can't imagine how difficult it must have been. I have lost my marriage, my house and my profession due to my addiction. I have been clean for 3 years now, but just the thought of what I've left in my wake makes me want to just cover my head and never come out again. But I read your post about how you had such a hard time when you went back to your old institution to speak and saw the old lab where you had to drop and your daughter held your hand. (I'm almost to tears writing this!!) I have a daughter that means the world to me and your story just reminded me of the relationship she and I have. You gave me a lot of strength through that story to move forward with my plans. Thank you, Jack. Don't stop doing what you do!
    TXRN2, jadelpn, and jackstem like this.
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    Thanks Spartan...YOU are the reason I do what I do.

    "Step 12 – Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

    Recovery cannot happen in isolation, it requires healthy relationships...especially with others in recovery.

    One day at a time!

    Jack
    LilRedRN1973, spartan813, TXRN2, and 1 other like this.


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